1010G零散版友作文互改帖（Issue）

figuechenUID：2850619

Issue131——"The arts (painting, music, literature, etc.) reveal the otherwise hidden ideas and impulses of a society."  

观点：不是所有艺术都揭露社会理念和动力，但大师作品都会。
分论点：
1. 艺术表现的是艺术家的思考，所以未必反映社会理念和动力。
2. 但艺术也能用来反映社会理念和动力。
3. 经典的传世之作大多反映了社会理念和动力。

Word:704
    What is art? According to Freud, art is a kind of release of individual lust, converting the human libido into plentiful creativity. Since arts are simply a reflection of the artists, they do not reveal the hidden ideas and impulses of a society all the time. On the other hand however, if we examine the history of air carefully, we will find that great works are the arts that reveal human characters and social ideas.
    Arts are created by artists, and therefore arts, in essence, are the expression of the artists, which might not have something to do with revelation of social ideas and impulses. For example, romantic love stories written by Jane Austen, such as Pride and Prejudice, stand on the view that one of the ways for a woman to raise her social status is to find a husband who owns both money and gentry. These works reflect more of her own senses than the ideas and impulses of a society, because the idea of pursuing for an outstanding husband is a human character which has remained for centuries and will definitely last, which cannot be described as impulses of a society. Another example is the Heroic Symphony, which was composed by Beethoven to honor and praise the wise general Napoleon. However, he felt disappointed after Napoleon announced himself the King and altered the original title of the symphony which contains the name of Napoleon. This composition reflects completely the political view of Beethoven, since there actually lay little demurs for Napoleon to be the King and therefore his view mixed in the composition cannot be called the ideas and impulses of a society.
    Arts, on the other hand, do have the function to reveal ideas and impulses in a society. Artists are people who live in a society and their ideas can somehow be regarded as the representative of contemporary people. For instance, Uncle Tom’s Cabin, a novel highly praised by President Lincoln, has aroused great sympathy for the African Americans who have been the slaves in the plantations in the South. This novel reflects the miserable lives of the salves and their pursuits for happiness and love, and some comments even describe the novel as the one which directly leads to the Civil War. We cannot gainsay that this novel reveals the ideas and impulses of the American society. Picasso is another example in the painting field. His painting work Guernica, which is a quite abstract one, denounced the German’s bombing in Guernica in the Spain Civil War, which involved in hundreds of thousands of innocent people. This work reveals not only his hatred, but also the accusation of the imperialism and the demands for peace of the whole society.
    Even if both styles exist in art field, there is fact which cannot be denied is that those influential works in art own the function of revealing social ideas and impulses. One of the most important reasons why these works deserve being defined as the great works is that the social ideas and impulses which are contained in these works strike a sympathetic chord in the viewers and critics. For example, the Catcher in the Rye, the book which George Bush considered one of the books that affected him most, has called for the society attention to the spiritual demands for youngsters, which evoked the same feeling of many readers. The Old Man and the Sea, written by Hemingway, mirrors the ideas and impulses of the American society to overcome difficulties and head for success. Millions of readers have been moved by the famous saying which I paraphrase that “Men can be annihilated, but they should not be defeated.” These works which are regarded as classics own the feature in common that they all disclose the human character and the social ideas.
    As Picasso said, “Art is a lie that tells us the truth”. It is because exaggerated methods are adopted that art is a lie, and it is because of the social function of arts to reveal the society ideas and impulses that art tells us the truth. It remains the truth that not all arts should head for society ideas and impulses, but at least those masterpieces should.

谢谢楼下了~

sucre1990UID：2619918

62# figuechen 占楼Issue131——"The arts (painting, music, literature, etc.) reveal the otherwise hidden ideas and impulses of a society."  

观点：不是所有艺术都揭露社会理念和动力，但大师作品都会。
分论点：
1. 艺术表现的是艺术家的思考，所以未必反映社会理念和动力。
2. 但艺术也能用来反映社会理念和动力。
3. 经典的传世之作大多反映了社会理念和动力。

Word:704
    What is art? According to Freud, art is a kind of release of individual lust, converting the human libido into plentiful creativity. Since arts are simply a reflection of the artists, they do not reveal the hidden ideas and impulses of a society all the time. On the other hand however, if we examine the history of air （笔误）carefully, we will find that great works are the arts（我觉得有点问题） that reveal human characters and social ideas.
    Arts are created by artists, and therefore arts, in essence, are the expression of the artists, which might not have something to do with revelation of social ideas and impulses. For example, romantic love stories written by Jane Austen, such as Pride and Prejudice, stand on the view that one of the ways for a woman to raise her social status is to find a husband who owns both money and gentry. These works reflect more of her own senses than the ideas and impulses of a society, because the idea of pursuing for an outstanding husband is a human character which has remained for centuries and will definitely last, which cannot be described as impulses of a society. Another example is the Heroic Symphony, which was composed by Beethoven to honor and praise the wise general Napoleon. However, he felt disappointed after Napoleon announced himself the King and altered the original title of the symphony which contains the name of Napoleon. This composition reflects completely the political view of Beethoven, since there actually lay little（几乎没有？） demurs for Napoleon to be the King and therefore his view mixed in the composition cannot be called the ideas and impulses of a society.
    Arts, on the other hand, do have the function to reveal ideas and impulses in a society. Artists are people who live in a society and their ideas can somehow be regarded as the representative of contemporary people.（感觉与前面的论证自相矛盾了，艺术作品反映的是艺术家推出不一定代表社会理念：艺术家是代表当代的人民的人？大众是社会的构成，艺术家反映社会理念？是否有些矛盾？） For instance, Uncle Tom’s Cabin, a novel highly praised by President Lincoln, has aroused great sympathy for the African Americans who have been the slaves in the plantations in the South. This novel reflects the miserable lives of the salves and their pursuits for happiness and love, and some comments even describe the novel as the one which directly leads to the Civil War. We cannot gainsay that this novel reveals the ideas and impulses of the American society. Picasso is another example in the painting field. His painting work Guernica, which is a quite abstract one, denounced the German’s bombing in Guernica in the Spain Civil War, which involved in hundreds of thousands of innocent people. This work reveals not only his hatred, but also the accusation of the imperialism and the demands for peace of the whole society.
    Even if both styles exist in art field, there is fact which cannot be denied is that those influential works in art own the function of revealing social ideas and impulses.（傲慢与偏见难道不是有影响的作品吗？） One of the most important reasons why these works deserve being defined as the great works is that the social ideas and impulses which are contained in these works strike a sympathetic chord in the viewers and critics. For example, the Catcher in the Rye, the book which George Bush considered one of the books that affected him most, has called for the society attention to the spiritual demands for youngsters, which evoked the same feeling of many readers. The Old Man and the Sea, written by Hemingway, mirrors the ideas and impulses of the American society to overcome difficulties and head for success. Millions of readers have been moved by the famous saying which I paraphrase that “Men can be annihilated, but they should not be defeated.” These works which are regarded as classics own the feature in common that they all disclose the human character and the social ideas.
    As Picasso said, “Art is a lie that tells us the truth”. It is because exaggerated methods are adopted that art is a lie, and it is because of the social function of arts to reveal the society ideas and impulses that art tells us the truth. It remains the truth that not all arts should head for society ideas and impulses, but at least those masterpieces should.
文章的例子很丰富，感觉文章很有意思，语言也很好，只是论证上有点问题
文章中的二段论证用的例子不好，用的例子中的艺术作品我们不能不说他们不是masterpiece，而后面你写的是masterpiece都能揭示社会的理念和动力，我觉得有点自相矛盾了。如果把二段的例子换下我觉得会更好（自己的观点）
还有请问作者最后一段的意思是什么，我没读懂。
相互交流，互相提高。

sucre1990UID：2619918

50"In order to improve the quality of instruction at the college and university level, all faculty should be required to spend time working outside the academic world in professions relevant to the courses they teach."


It appears to me that the writer's view, to improve the quality of instruction at the college and university level, all faculty should be required to spend time working outside the academic world in professions relevant to the courses they teach, is lack of thoughtful consideration. The measure to develop a discipline's instruction is depending on its own attribution and not all the branches of science are the same.

It is true that the practical disciplines' teachers, such as engineering and electronics teachers, need working experience besides academic knowledge for better teaching purpose. In these fields, students' future careers are always meant to apply their knowledge into practice. If teachers don't have the insightful working-relevant experience, it is almost impossible to lead students to a right direction of their learning. Besides if the faculty don't know how the theory knowledge is utilized in real world and work, how they can guide their students to contribute to the society. Take aeronautics engineering, my best known discipline, for example. The knowledge of air dynamics is very complicated, and it has a lot of formulas, equations and theories. If we are not taught how the theory is applied or how the formula is deduced by the teacher who has airplane designing and manufacturing work experience with vivid case in production, we can hardly remember these or just mess them up and even don't mention to apply it in future career.

Additionally, if these teachers, regarded as the most talent and creative people in the practical technology fields, work in the correlative jobs ,it may have a positive effect to the field which will indirectly improve the teaching level .Even sometimes more exciting events like Nikola Tesla who always put theory into application ,began the alternate era will happen. But the practical branches are just a part of disciplines in university courses, another part is obvious not the same situation.

When it comes to the real academic knowledge or the theoretical ones, it seems ridiculous rather than rational to push professors to work out of their academic world. They are not suitable for non-academic world. Like math and physics for instance, as we know, these subject are basically the individual and thinking work, if the teachers in these areas are asked to work outside, they may feel helpless or even hurt for they have not got enough skills to deal with people because they used to be too busy thinking in their world to get along with other people. And it will waste them a lot of time which could has spent on their meaningful creation. Moreover, there is not much such their knowledge-related work out there. If the teachers are exhausted, how can it be happen to improve the level  of  teaching.

To be frank, the improvement of some branches of sciences is actually based on some genius, which we may not be willing to admit, but can you image that if there was no Albert Einstein, we could still knew the theory of nuclear fusion. Such people with inborn talent are here to improve .So the instruction level sometimes may depend on the born of a genius of the time instead of a teacher's skill much less to ordering teacher to work in related work.

In sum, I concede order faculty to work out the academic world in their professions related work is the way to improve teaching level in some cases. But these cases must refer to the ones that have much to do with application. If apply such method in the theoretical ones, it may even block the development of the courses’ instruction. In my view, every branch of learning has its own development process and its own character. If we want to make a difference in instruction, we should consider their differences and then make the proper plan.
谢谢楼下的

anniehalUID：2716032

It appears to me that the writer's view, to improve the quality of instruction at the college and university level, all faculty should be required to spend time working outside the academic world in professions relevant to the courses they teach,（换下自己的话陈述会更好。。恩^^） is lack of thoughtful consideration. The measure to develop a discipline's instruction is depending on its own attribution and not all the branches of science are the same.

It is true that the practical disciplines' teachers, such as engineering and electronics teachers, need working experience besides academic knowledge for better teaching purpose(for the purpose of providing better teaching quality). In these fields, students' future careers are always meant to apply their knowledge into practice. If teachers don't have the insightful working-relevant experience, it is almost impossible to lead students to a right direction of their learning. Besides if the faculty don't know how the theory knowledge is utilized in real world and work(pragmatically), how they can guide their students to contribute to the society. Take aeronautics engineering, my best known discipline, for example.(词句没有谓语阿。。) The knowledge of air dynamics is very complicated, and it has a lot of formulas, equations and theories. If we are not taught how the theory is applied or how the formula is deduced by the teacher who has airplane designing and manufacturing work experience with vivid case in production,（此if从句太长，头重脚轻了） we can hardly remember these or just mess them up and even don't mention to apply it in future career.

Additionally, if these teachers, regarded as the most talent and creative people in the practical technology fields, work in the correlative jobs ,it may have a positive effect to the field which will indirectly improve the teaching level .Even sometimes more exciting events like Nikola Tesla who always put theory into application ,began the alternate era will happen（？）. But the practical branches are just a part of disciplines in university courses, another part is obvious not the same situation.

When it comes to the real academic knowledge or the theoretical ones, it seems ridiculous rather than rational to push professors to work out of their academic world. They（who？） are not suitable for non-academic world. Like math and physics for instance, as we know, these subject are basically the individual and thinking work（有点chinglish><）, if the teachers in these areas are asked to work outside, they may feel helpless or even hurt for they(太夸张了吧。。) have not got enough skills to deal with people because they used to be too busy thinking in their world to get along with other people. And it will waste them a lot of time which could has spent on their meaningful creation. Moreover, there is not much such their knowledge-related work out there.（语法有问题） If the teachers are exhausted, how can it be happen to improve the level  of  teaching.(这段的切入点不大好，个人认为最好强调，有些学科例如文科，是要更多的critical thinking的工作，而不是实际经验。而不是侧重强调他们的social skill不好)

To be frank, the improvement of some branches of sciences is actually based on some genius, which we may not be willing to admit, but can you image that if there was no Albert Einstein, we could still knew the theory of nuclear fusion. Such people with inborn talent are here to improve .So the instruction level sometimes may depend on the born of a genius of the time instead of a teacher's skill much less to ordering teacher to work in related work.（这段在干吗？？。。和主旨关系不大吧。。建议删除，最后一段总结的时候也完全没提及这段阿。。）

In sum, I concede order faculty to work out the academic world in their professions related work is the way to improve teaching level in some cases. But these cases must refer to the ones that have much to do with application. If apply such method in the theoretical ones, it may even block the development of the courses’ instruction. In my view, every branch of learning has its own development process and its own character. If we want to make a difference in instruction, we should consider their differences and then make the proper plan.

anniehalUID：2716032

TOPIC: ISSUE40 - "Scholars and researchers should not be concerned with whether their work makes a contribution to the larger society. It is more important that they pursue their individual interests, however unusual or idiosyncratic those interests may seem."
WORDS: 242-580          TIME: 00:40:19          DATE: 2010-7-17 18:26:12

I partly agree with the statement above. Scholars and researchers should be concerned with the results of their work, as the effects it will bring to the offspring and world could influence the whole nature.  However, it is quite hard to tell the future. On this base, we should also encourage scientists to pursue their own interest, no matter how idiosyncratic it seems, since their work may also be useful and rewarding when it is needed in the unknown future. In my point of view, theses two kinds of research are all the same importance.

We are facing many urgent problems these days, such as environment pollution, decreasing energy resources, increasing global warming and so on. These kinds of problems are called to be solved as soon as possible, as we can see the uncontroverted impact they would lay on in our near future. Therefore, many scientific projects were made especially for solving these issues. And undoubtedly, the results of scholars and researchers' work, whether they would be effective and useful to solve these problems, are the major criteria to judge whether their work is meaningful or not. Besides these long-term issues we have today, regarding to those immediate problems, such as new diseases, machinery malfunctions, it is also scientists’ responsibility to try their bests to work out the issues than concerning their own dreams. Just like lately, many researchers are working hard on finding the methods to solve the leaking oil problem of Britain BP, which is concerned a lot by the large public. Scientists and researchers, who have more professional knowledge than the general people, should burden more responsibility to discover the ways to solve problems and make contribution to the larger society.

However, no one can foresee the future. It is entirely possible that some researchers we regard as wasting time and energy these days would help the future development of science and technology. It was impossible to tell that heliocentric system discovered by Copernicus would paved the way for corroborating(支持，证实) observation of Galileo, which also set the stage for Newton’s Law of Gravity, and ultimately led to Relativism uncovered by Einstein. All the theories are simply single idea at the first stage, but they maybe the essential foundation of the discovery afterwards. And as it’s known to all, interests is the best guide, without which scientists will just have little passion in their work, let alone continuously persisting. Without the interest of inventing the bomb, how could Nobel conducted thousands and millions of dangerous experiments? Without the passion about finding the long-lightening bulb material, how could Edison found the bulb made of tungsten wire after countless failures? Therefore, it is quite important to encourage and support scholars and researchers to work in the fiend that really interests them, even it may looks like an absurd fairy tale, since only these kinds of work can scholars have the determination to insist on and they are probably be useful in the future researches.

On one hand, regarding to those pressing problems relating to the whole social welfare and safeness, it is a great concern that whether scholars and researchers’ work will make the contribution to the larger society or not. On the other hand, supporting scientists to pursue their own interests properly is also of great importance, due to all the findings maybe valuable in the future work. In my point of view, both of the two ideas about research are meaningful to the whole society.

追梦小木耳UID：2781857

I partly agree with the statement above. Scholars and researchers should be concerned with the results of their work, as the effects it will bring to the offspring and world could influence the whole nature.  However, it is quite hard to tell the future. On this base, we should also encourage scientists to pursue their own interest, no matter how idiosyncratic it seems, since their work may also be useful and rewarding when it is needed in the unknown future. In my point of view, theses two kinds of research are of all the same importance.

We are facing many urgent problems these days nowadays, such as environment environmental pollution, decreasing amount of energy resources, increasing global warming and so on. These kinds of problems are called to be solved call for solutions as soon as possible, as we can see the uncontroverted impact they would lay on in our near future. Therefore, many scientific projects were made especially for solving these issues. And undoubtedly, the results of scholars and researchers' work, whether they would be effective and useful to solve these problems, are the major criteria to judge whether their work is meaningful or not. Besides these long-term issues we have today, are regarding to those immediate problems, such as new diseases, machinery malfunctions, it is also scientists’ responsibility to try their bests to work out the issues than concerning their own dreams. Just like lately, many researchers are working hard on finding the methods to solve the leaking oil problem of Britain BP, which is concerned a lot by the large public. Scientists and researchers, who have more professional knowledge than the general people, should burden more responsibility to discover the ways to solve problems and make contribution to the larger society.
主题句最好能在开头点出~

However, no one can foresee the future. It is entirely possible that some researchers we regard as who are thought to be wasting time and energy these days would help the future development of science and technology. It was impossible to tell that heliocentric system discovered by Copernicus would paved the way for corroborating(支持，证实) observation of Galileo, which also set the stage for Newton’s Law of Gravity, and ultimately led to Relativism uncovered by Einstein. All the theories are simply single idea at the first stage, but they maybe the essential foundation of the discovery afterwards. And as it’s known to all
it is known, interests is are the best guide, without which scientists will just have little passion in their work, let alone continuously persisting. Without the interest of inventing the bomb, how could Nobel conducted thousands and millions of dangerous experiments? Without the passion about finding the long-lightening bulb material, how could Edison found the bulb made of tungsten wire after countless failures? Therefore, it is quite important to encourage and support scholars and researchers to work in the fiend field that really interests them, even it may looks like an absurd fairy tale, since only these kinds of work can scholars have the determination to insist on and they are probably be useful in the future researches.

On one hand, regarding to those pressing problems relating to the whole social welfare and safeness, it is a great concern that whether scholars and researchers’ work will make the contribution to the larger society or not. On the other hand, supporting scientists to pursue their own interests properly is also of great importance, due to all the findings maybe valuable in the future work. In my point of view, both of the two ideas about research are meaningful to the whole society.

作者关于两方面的论述都非常充分。但是忽视了最重要的一点，也是我认为的这个题目的论点——如果科学家的个人兴趣和社会贡献相矛盾怎么办？如果仅凭兴趣做科研，做出的结果对国家社会有害怎么办？比如有些人明明知道克隆人违背社会道德伦理，还是凭着自己的兴趣和执着去研究，这对吗？应该被鼓励吗？

虽然把两方面并列起来看也是有道理的，但是这个问题涉及到了比较，就涉及了好处和坏处，而作者仅仅说了各自的好处，是不完整的。比如你说到了研究环保问题是对社会有好处的，那么如果科学家为了自己的兴趣而做导致污染环境的实验应当被鼓励吗？虽然如你所写，未来是未知的，科研可能有潜在的好处，但其坏处也是难以预料的。比如核能的利用等等。

希望作者再深入想一想这个问题

追梦小木耳UID：2781857

11 All nations should help support the development of a global university designed to engage students in the process of solving the world's most persistent social problems."

不同意。世界大学看起来合理，但是忽略了各国的差异，是不实际的
1看起来似乎融合了世界上的所有资源，来解决社会问题，并且能够使落后国家的学生受益。但是忽略了各国的差异，不能实现这样的目标
2 首先，由于各国的国情不同，最急迫的社会问题也不同，无法通过学生讨论解决。有些国家贫困，有些国家犯罪率高，有的国家歧视妇女。
  对于相同的社会问题，由于社会制度、历史文化不同，解决的方法也不同。比如贫困，各国普遍存在，没有统一的方法可以解决。比如有的是人口多引起的，有的是资源不足，有的是长期战争。。。。
3 让所有国家参与也是不可能的。因为各个国家投资不同，所起的影响不同。比如发达国家投资的钱多，老师好，就会起主导作用，解决本国的社会问题，忽视不发达国家的问题。或者强加想法给不发达的国家

Word:572

The proposition to assemble the support of all nations to build global university appears to be sensible, while it ignores the diversity of each society so as the social problems, which makes it unpractical to conduct.

The proposal presented seems practical on the ground that the global university would merge available resources from all nations to cultivate students. And with the wisdom and intelligence of the students, those long-time existed social problems that people have been confronting could be all solved. However, from my perspective, the establishment of global university has failed to figure out the complication of those persistent social problems, as well as the its possibility

First of all, the vague definition of persistent social problems limits the amount of problems to a certain number, ignoring the fact that different society may confront different prolonged problems. There exist paramount situations that can hardly be simply summarized by the students. In most African countries, the urgent and chronic problem is poverty; in mid-east countries, it may be feminine discrimination; in China and India, it is the over large population and in some other countries somewhere, it may be high criminal rate, racial discrimination or economic crisis. Although, the global university consists of students from all nations, possibility is little to identify all the chronic social problems in each nation, nor can they conclude the universally persistent social problems.

Even if the international students in global university have had identified the protracted social problems that exist in most nations, it remains to be a doubt whether they are able to conceive effective solutions to these problems. As for the same social problem in different countries, it could have stem from various roots, thus calling for distinguished solutions. For instance, poverty is a world-wide social problem that has bothered people for centuries. Can the global university students solve this problem? Considering the distinctions in developing level, culture and history, there must involve a variety of essential reasons for poverty including exploding population, prolonged civil war, the lake of resources and supplements or backward development of technology. With so much complex circumstances, how could the students come up with a concrete method to solve world-spread poverty?

Second, the involvement of all nations would lead to new argument with justice and equity. Due to the difference of educational level, the quality of faculty as well as the investment that each country has contributed to the global university varies. Just as the United Nations, the countries who invest high qualified professors and more money would have large influence over the others. Hence, students from these countries may have more focus, and the decisions made to solve certain social problems could be beneficial to these countries. For instance, one nation could attribute its high rate of crime to the immigrants. To solve the problem, the students from the nation propose to control immigrations, which may be effective but damage the profit of the nations whose citizens intend to emigrate to that country. With the beneficial conflicts between nations, just solution that proper to all nations could hardly be agreed on.  

In conclusion, the establishment of global university is presumptuous. Owing to the gigantic distinction of each nation, it is arduous to arrive at consensus toward every single social problem. From my point of view, the government of each nation has duties to dedicate to solving own persistent social problems and had better not interfere other nations’ problems.

tyarelUID：2756223

既然当中漏了有没改的，那我还是占楼改70L的吧


11 All nations should help support the development of a global university designed to engage students in the process of solving the world's most persistent social problems."

不同意。世界大学看起来合理，但是忽略了各国的差异，是不实际的
1看起来似乎融合了世界上的所有资源，来解决社会问题，并且能够使落后国家的学生受益。但是忽略了各国的差异，不能实现这样的目标
2 首先，由于各国的国情不同，最急迫的社会问题也不同，无法通过学生讨论解决。有些国家贫困，有些国家犯罪率高，有的国家歧视妇女。
  对于相同的社会问题，由于社会制度、历史文化不同，解决的方法也不同。比如贫困，各国普遍存在，没有统一的方法可以解决。比如有的是人口多引起的，有的是资源不足，有的是长期战争。。。。
3 让所有国家参与也是不可能的。因为各个国家投资不同，所起的影响不同。比如发达国家投资的钱多，老师好，就会起主导作用，解决本国的社会问题，忽视不发达国家的问题。或者强加想法给不发达的国家

Word:572

The proposition to assemble the support of all nations to build global university appears to be sensible, while it ignores the diversity of each society so as the social problems, which makes it unpractical to conduct. (infeasible?只是个建议～)

The proposal presented seems practical on the ground that the global university would merge available resources from all nations to cultivate students. And with the wisdom and intelligence of the students, those long-time existed (existent?) social problems that people have been confronting could be all solved. However, from my perspective, the establishment of global university has failed to figure out the complication of those persistent social problems, as well as the its possibility

First of all, the vague definition of persistent social problems limits the amount of problems to a certain number, ignoring the fact that different society may confront different prolonged problems. There exist paramount situations that can hardly be simply summarized by the students. In most African countries, the urgent and chronic problem is poverty; in mid-east countries, it may be feminine discrimination; in China and India, it is the over large population and in some other countries somewhere, it may be high criminal rate, racial discrimination or economic crisis. Although, the global university consists of students from all nations, possibility is little (感觉有点怪,我只见过这个搭配low likelihood) to identify all the chronic social problems in each nation, nor can they conclude the universally persistent social problems. (conclude problem?这个搭配比较困惑)

Even if the international students in global university have had identified the protracted social problems that exist in most nations, it remains to be a doubt whether they are able to conceive effective solutions to these problems. As for the same social problem in different countries, it could have stem from various roots, thus calling for distinguished solutions. For instance, poverty is a world-wide social problem that has bothered people for centuries. Can the global university students solve this problem? Considering the distinctions in developing level, culture and history, there must involve a variety of essential reasons for poverty including exploding population, prolonged civil war, the lake (lack) of resources and supplements or backward development of technology. With so much (many?) complex circumstances, how could the students come up with a concrete method to solve world-spread poverty?

Second (上面是一个方面的2个小点，这里换了个方面，所以个人觉得on the other hand会更合适一点), the involvement of all nations would lead to new argument with justice and equity. Due to the difference of educational level, the quality of faculty as well as the investment that each country has contributed to the global university varies. Just as the United Nations, the countries who invest high qualified professors and more money would have large influence over the others. Hence, students from these countries may have more focus, and the decisions made to solve certain social problems could be beneficial to these countries. For instance, one nation could attribute its high rate of crime to the immigrants. To solve the problem, the students from the nation propose to control immigrations, which may be effective but damage the profit of the nations whose citizens intend to emigrate to that country. With the beneficial conflicts between nations, just solution that proper to all nations could hardly be agreed on.  

In conclusion, the establishment of global university is presumptuous. Owing to the gigantic distinction of each nation, it is arduous to arrive at consensus toward every single social problem. From my point of view, the government of each nation has duties to dedicate to solving own persistent social problems and had better not interfere other nations’ problems.


囧,2天改同一个题目，大家果然反对比较多～
逻辑挺清楚的，分析方面也没什么问题，对这个提议的主要反驳点抓住了
就对后一个的反驳的例子提点建议，我觉得这个例子还不够典型，或者说不是特别有力。即使在国内任何政策总有受益群体和受害群体，感觉有点拿国家利益和个人利益比较的疑问，不太平衡，体现不出国家与国家之间因为实力不同话语权不同的这个论点。其实我觉得环境问题碳排放量这个不就是个很好的例子嘛？哥本哈根大会就是一个扯着合作解决世界问题大旗结果各国互相扯皮的典型案例，是吧～拿这么一个更具有世界意义的例子感觉更有力～

tyarelUID：2756223

51 "Education will be truly effective only when it is specifically designed to meet the individual needs and interests of each student."
51．只有针对每个学生的需要和兴趣，教育才真正的有意义。

With more and more concerns for educational quality, people try to make education truly effective. However, I cannot agree with the assertion that whether education is designed for individual decides its efficiency. In my opinion, the only criterion, especially to school education, is whether education fulfills its function to assist students in developing their views and to offer them helpful skills.

Foremost, students should find their interests and targets after learning. Helping them have their own ambitions and dreams is the first and most important aim. Since students may merely have a rough understand about so many fields, it's not effortless to them to find their career goals. Learning in the school will be the first step of their contact with the various aspects of the world. Through that, they will gradually find out what exactly they are good at most, as well as their interests. After that, with the conducts and suggestions from experienced teachers, students can build their own views of life. Goals decided at that time will direct them and become what they pursue all their lives. On the contrary, image students graduating without any directions, how can they find most satisfactory jobs, let alone realize their values all their lives. Hence, whether it can contribute to students’ discovery their own interests and formation of views of lives is the first measurement to the efficiency of education.

Those having definitive directions but owning no skills also have little chance to succeed since they have nothing to real their dreams. So, besides that mentioned above, personal ability is another necessary condition to them. Through instructions from teachers, students will have a good command of knowledge in different fields and especially in colleges, students can obtain more expertise. Even they don't choose their majors as their careers, study also train them in other ways. For instance, the experience of making presentation does well to students' skills on speech, which is essential since it will be needed in interviews. What's more, the homework required to be finished with classmates trains students’ teamwork spirits, from which can they recognize the importance of cooperation and learn to take the interests of the whole team into consideration. Students without these skills will just be like the eagles without wings and never will they achieve their ambitions. In no way is the education effective if students cannot learn sufficient skills from that.

In addition, a third thing students should master from school education is how to learn. Accessible as all the information is to students during their study in the school, it's still impossible for them to gain all they need in such a short time. Thus, the only way is to teach them the methods of learn, which will conduce to them even though they are no longer in the school, like how to consult document. Those having no ideas about study methods will recognize that the expertise they get in schools is far from enough and their lack of this ability will be their Achilles’ Heel however talented they are. Hence, it is the responsibility of education that is to instruct students the means of study. And how can the education that fails to do their duty be considered as effective?

In short, what matters to education is not which means it chooses but what it provides to students. Therefore, education carrying out its obligations and offering those instrumental to students' future is the real effective one.

谢谢楼下了～

yiranlanUID：2857147

Paragraph1:
1.觉得MORE AND MORE太口语话,建议用INCREASING这类的代替
2.especially to school education, I would use for instead of to, also I don't get what do you by saying especially. I like the sentense without it. (PS. I am tired of swtiching back and forth between english and Chinese, so plz bear with me of using english. hope LS doesn't mind)

P2:
1.The most important aim
2. Rough understanding
3. effoetless for them ?
4. drop the, learing in school
5.Goals decided at that time will direct them and become what they pursue [add sth here?]all their lives.   suggest change become to achieve   add in before all
6. graduating without[]any diractions      sugguest: having
7. let alone realize their values all their lives     I don't quite get what you try to say here
8.contribute to students’ discovery[of] their own interests

P3:
1. never will they achieve their ambitions     I can't say this is wrong, but somehow uncomfortable... Sth like never be able to achieve....
2. In no way is the education [] effective if students cannot learn sufficient skills from that.
    suggest: There is no way education is effective if....
                   Education is not effctive if......  It is unrealistic that education.....
P4:
1.the methods of learning
2.however talented they are        ? missing sth?
3. drop the before education
4. what matters to education is not which means it chooses     I don't get this >.<

Suggestions:
1. Use long sentenses only when you mastered the sturcture, otherwise it is very easily to confuse people.
2. More emphasis on your view of this issue, at least briefly list the major reasonings

yiranlanUID：2857147

BLANK FOR MYSELF

anniehalUID：2716032

66# 追梦小木耳
朋友。。心急阿~。。

tyarelUID：2756223

占71L～

tyarelUID：2756223

43 "To be an effective leader, a public official must maintain the highest ethical and moral standards."
43．一个政府官员要想成为一位有成效的领导者，必须有极高的伦理和道德修养。



1.道德和伦理修养是很重要的，政府官员必须以国家为重不谋私利才会成为有成效的领导者
2.highest道德和伦理并不是唯一或者最重要的衡量标准，关键在于是否有能力解决社会关注的问题
3.作为一个领导者，还必须要有自信或者说魄力，特别对于意在推行改革的领导者


According to the statement, the author regarded highest ethical and moral standard as the measurement of an effective leader. Undeniably, high moral standard is really essential. But, is that the only contributor? In my opinion, some other qualities including whether he is willing to serve the public, whether he is qualified to the position and whether he is trusts himself are the key points to an effective leader.

Foremost, whether a public official is willing to dedicate himself to serving the public is fundamental to an effective leader. Can you image a person never considering the interests of the country and the public will make great contributions to society? All they care is just what the position and his rights can bring him. Corruptions may be the best example. Those bribed must focus more on themselves. And thus, they sought interests regardless of civilians. On the contrary, it's natural that all those effective leaders will devote all their efforts to their work since that is their aspiration and motivation. Therefore, willingness to serve the public with dedication and integrity is the basic requirement to an effective leader.

Compared with dedication, capability may be a more critical criterion. It is nearly impossible to consider a leader without any capabilities as effective. Without any contributions, the leader will lose the favor from the public, and resignation may be inevitable, just like the latest 5 Japanese presidents. So, only those promoting the development of the country and bringing prosperity to civilians will be advocated. For instance, Hitler isn’t a person with highest moral standard of course. He waged the World War 2 and committed countless horrible crimes besides slaughtered numerous Jews. However, what indeed rendered almost all Germans are faithful a madman like him besides his outstanding speech skills? Why he can lead Germany to challenge the world? The only reason is his capability. After becoming the fuehrer of Germany, Hitler reformed the economical system, reopened factories along the Rhine and built highways across the country. All he did turned Germany from a loser of World War 1 having no alliances with terrible deficit and more than 6 million unemployed people to one of the most powerful and developed countries. This great change just happened in the first 3 years of his duration and meanwhile the annual growth in economy was more than 30% while the rate of unemployment declined from 30% to 0%. Hence, it is understandable what an effective leader Hitler was to Germany in that time. You can regard Hitler as a crazy or a devil, but you have to attribute the revival of Germany to his capability and he can’t be more effective as a leader.

Last but not least, to be an effective leader also calls for confidence, especially to those having plans of reformation. Beneficial as it is to some classes, reformation will also offend others' interests. Thus, it's rather stressful to implement reformations under the opposing voices from opposition party and the public. Imaging if Obama did not insist his policy in medicine, how can Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act be legislated? Without confidence, an official will easily influenced by different ideas and cannot persist with his opinions. Hesitation will make it hard to be an effective leader.

To sum up, maybe high moral standard is useful to an effective leader, but what matter are his dedication, capability and confidence. Those lacking these cannot be an effective leader no matter how high their ethical and moral standard is.

sucre1990UID：2619918

74# tyarel 占楼



According to the statement, the author regarded highest ethical and moral standard as the measurement of an effective leader. Undeniably, high moral standard is really essential. But, is that the only contributor? In my opinion, some other qualities including whether he is willing to serve the public, whether he is qualified to the position and whether he is trusts(trusts) himself are the key points to an effective leader.

Foremost, whether a public official is willing to dedicate himself to serving the public is fundamental to an effective leader. Can you image a person never considering the interests of the country and the public will make great contributions to society? All they care is just what the position and his rights can bring him. Corruptions may be the best example. Those bribed must focus more on themselves. And thus, they sought interests regardless of civilians. On the contrary, it's natural that all those effective leaders will devote all their efforts to their work since that is their aspiration and motivation. Therefore, willingness to serve the public with dedication and integrity is the basic requirement to an effective leader.(例子感觉没说开 举例不充分 可以说说腐败造成的后果)

Compared with dedication, capability may be a more critical criterion. It is nearly impossible to consider a leader without any capabilities as effective. Without any contributions, the leader will lose the favor from the public, and resignation may be inevitable, just like the latest 5 Japanese presidents. So, only those promoting the development of the country and bringing prosperity to civilians will be advocated. For instance, Hitler isn’t a person with highest moral standard of course. He waged the World War 2 and committed countless horrible crimes besides slaughtered numerous Jews. However, what indeed rendered almost all Germans are faithful a madman like him besides his outstanding speech skills? Why he can lead Germany to challenge the world? The only reason is his capability. After becoming the fuehrer of Germany, Hitler reformed the economical(economic) system, reopened factories along the Rhine and built highways across the country. All he did turned Germany from a loser of World War 1 having no alliances with terrible deficit and more than 6 million unemployed people to one of the most powerful and developed countries. This great change just happened in the first 3 years of his duration and meanwhile the annual growth in economy was more than 30% while the rate of unemployment declined from 30% to 0%. Hence, it is understandable what an effective leader Hitler was to Germany in（at） that time. You can regard Hitler as a crazy or a devil, but you have to attribute the revival of Germany to his capability and he can’t be more effective as a leader.

Last but not least, to be an effective leader also calls for confidence, especially to those having plans of（for） reformation. Beneficial as it is to some classes, reformation will also offend others' interests. Thus, it's rather stressful to implement reformations under the opposing voices from opposition party and the public. Imaging if Obama did not insist his policy in medicine, how can Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act be legislated? Without confidence, an official will easily influenced by different ideas and cannot persist with his opinions. Hesitation will make it hard to be an effective leader.

To sum up, maybe high moral standard is useful to an effective leader, but what matter are his dedication, capability and confidence. Those lacking these cannot be an effective leader no matter how high their ethical and moral standard is.
如果不论主题来说的话文章的思路很清晰，语言也很流畅，只是例子的选取有些问题，如果将有几个例子稍微说开点，我会觉得更好。
但就本题来说我想你是不是有点跑题了，题目中说的是道德跟effective leader的关系，而你在说什么品质可以使成为一个effective leader。就想题目说鱼离不开水，你的文章在写鱼还需要吃东西。希望提到你的见解
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