1006G小九的备考日志——我心中有猛虎，细嗅蔷薇。完结篇

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      转了一圈，发现强人一堆。我这只小菜鸟犹豫了片刻，还是弱弱地抬头。
      就算单词一遍还没过完，就算英语的基础并不优秀，就算离目标有一千公里的距离，至少，还是要抬头，迈出一步。
      荀子曰：不积跬步，无以至千里；不积小流，无以至江海。从今天开始，不再四处张望，专注脚下，目光坚定。
      其实想不出什么宣言，我实在不是个激越的人。只是想起Siegfried Sassoon的句子"In me the tiger sniffe the rose."余光中先生把它翻译为：我心中有猛虎，细嗅蔷薇。甚是喜欢。
       谨以此记录备考的每一天。
      

123runfordreamUID: 2697608

我心中有猛虎，细嗅蔷薇。
我喜欢。
In me the tiger sniffe the rose。
加油加油。我们一起杀G。

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忘记空出来，编辑掉，留给斑斑。

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11.8笔记补上
20 questions for writers
审题是打开思路的第一步，这20个问题归结起来是这样一种逻辑思考状态：

第一，问现象。
1.What does X mean? (Definition)
11.What is the present status of X? (Comparison)
13. What are the facts about X? (Reportage)
15.What kind of person is X? (Characterization/Profile)
16. What is my personal response to X? (Reflection)

第二，问细节。
2. What are the various features of X? (Description)
3. What are the component parts of X? (Simple Analysis)
9. What are the types of X? (Classification)
19. What are the essential major points or features of X? (Summary)


第三，问原因。（这一问是举例论证的阐述重点）
4. How is X made or done? (Process Analysis)
7.What are the causes of X? (Causal Analysis)
14. How did X happen? (Narration)
17. What is my memory of X? (Reminiscence)就这一问，我的看法是选择事例来论证观点导致的原因。
20. What case can be made for or against X? (Persuasion)

第四，问结果。
6. What is the essential function of X? (Functional Analysis)
8. What are the consequences of X? (Causal Analysis)
12. What is the significance of X? (Interpretation)
18. What is the value of X? (Evaluation)

第五，拓展思路。
5. How should X be made or done? (Directional Analysis) 当个人论点与论题现象相左，这个问题则是表明自我观点的重要问题，提出见解，说明原因。

10. How is X like or unlike Y? (Comparison) 横向比较也是开阔思路的办法，如果只围绕一个题目一种现象去解释难免词穷理尽，而适当的联想对比会更形象更丰富。


看完第一讲后理清了一下思路，不至于拿到问题不知从何下手。做一个小小的总结，不知道是否有理解偏差，望各位指正。

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继续，继续。
Writing anxiety and writer's block 看过去可以总结为两句话：Writing 是弹簧，你若它就强=。=我们要在战略上藐视它，在战术上重视它。
其实充分的准备和扎实的基本功才是最重要的，只要心里有底，就可以扫除恐惧。

Then start to write.
1.Ask yourself what your purpose is for writing about the subject.
这一步需要审题，回到第一讲，也就是问现象，问细节，然后确定观点。写出Thesis。

2.Ask yourself how you are going to achieve this purpose.
同样结合第一讲，问原因，问结果，想事例，

3.Start the ideas flowing

Gather as many good and bad ideas, suggestions, examples, sentences, false starts, etc. as you can. Perhaps some friends can join in. Jot down everything that comes to mind, including material you are sure you will throw out. Be ready to keep adding to the list at odd moments as ideas continue to come to mind.信息事例的收集和整理，往往出现意想不到的小火花。

See if you can find a fresh analogy that opens up a new set of ideas. Build your analogy by using the word like. For example, if you are writing about violence on television, is that violence like clowns fighting in a carnival act (that is, we know that no one is really getting hurt)?这个方法很有意思。

4.Nutshell your whole idea.
窃以为这个就是准备Thesis sentence的时候。

5.Diagram your major points somehow.

6.Write a first draft.
对我来说写个草稿然后不断修改的过程是非常重要的，每一次的修改都是一次进步，在不断完善的过程中查漏补缺。

苏东坡先生说：“竹之始生，一寸之萌耳，而节叶具焉。自蜩腹蛇蚹，以至于剑拔十寻者，生而有之也。今画者乃节节而为之，叶叶而累之，岂复有竹乎！故画竹必先得成竹于胸中，执笔熟视，乃见其所欲画者，急其从之，振笔直遂，以追其所见，如兔起鹘落，少纵则逝矣。”
与君共勉。

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第六讲笔记
What is a thesis
A thesis statement declares what you believe and what you intend to prove. A good thesis statement makes the difference between a thoughtful research project and a simple retelling of facts.
A thesis statement is a sentence (or sentences) that expresses the main ideas of your paper and answers the question or questions posed by your paper.
The thesis statement is typically located at the end of your opening paragraph.(这点需要格外明确,以前不曾注意过的问题)
You must do a lot of background reading before you know enough about a subject to identify key or essential questions. You may not know how you stand on an issue until you have examined the evidence. You will likely begin your research with a working, preliminary or tentative thesis which you will continue to refine until you are certain of where the evidence leads.(thesis的确定不可想当然，要建立在事实证据的基础之上，而对证据的分析理解也是必不可少的。这个问题其实表现得很突出，我看到题目往往立即得出结论然后根据结论选择可以证明结论的证据，但在真正的paper写作中，这是一个本末倒置的问题，只有对事实根据做理解分析才有可能得出结论，而结论也要受得住证据的考量，牢记)
Remember, your reader will be looking for your thesis. Make it clear, strong, and easy to find.（感觉类似于高考改卷中找关键词=。=）

Argumentative Thesis Statements
An argumentative thesis statement will tell your audience:
·your claim or assertion
·the reasons/evidence that support this claim
·the order in which you will be presenting your reasons and evidence
简言之，要做到有理有据
Questions to ask yourself when writing an argumentative thesis statement:
·What is my claim or assertion?
·What are the reasons I have to support my claim or assertion?
·In what order should I present my reasons?
说白了，I and A都是要求我们做一个说客，thesis就是一针见血的总结归纳，I and A不是novel，不需要华丽的词藻和繁杂的虚构，需要的是充分的事实和强有力的结论，循序渐进或者各个击破，目的只有一个，说服。
Attributes of a good thesis:

·It should be contestable, proposing an arguable point with which people could reasonably disagree. A strong thesis is provocative; it takes a stand and justifies the discussion you will present.
·It tackles a subject that could be adequately covered in the format of the project assigned.
·It is specific and focused. A strong thesis proves a point without discussing “everything about …” Instead of music, think "American jazz in the 1930s" and your argument about it. （注意，主题不要假，大，空，要具体针对问题！）
·It clearly asserts your own conclusion based on evidence. Be flexible. The evidence may lead you to a conclusion you didn't think you'd reach.（又一次强调，事实说话）
·It provides the reader with a map to guide him/her through your work. （thesis 的作用）
·It anticipates and refutes the counter-arguments
·It avoids vague language (like "it seems").
·It avoids the first person. ("I believe," "In my opinion") (这是我常犯的毛病)
·It should pass the So what? or Who cares? (Would your most honest friend ask why he should care or respond with "but everyone knows that"?) For instance, "people should avoid driving under the influence of alcohol," would be unlikely to evoke any opposition.

（To be sure to choose a topic worth arguing about or exploring. This means to construct a thesis statement or research question about a problem that is still debated, controversial, up in the air.）

("Tell me something new about something I care about."That will automatically make your paper significant and interesting both for you to write and the reader to study. )

公式：

Specific topic + Attitude/Angle/Argument = Thesis

What you plan to argue + How you plan to argue it = Thesis

Try these five tests:

·Does the thesis inspire a reasonable reader to ask, "How?" or Why?"
·Would a reasonable reader NOT respond with "Duh!" or "So what?" or "Gee, no kidding!" or "Who cares?" (should pass the so what or who cares)
·Does the thesis avoid general phrasing and/or sweeping words such as "all" or "none" or "every"?
·Does the thesis lead the reader toward the topic sentences (the subtopics needed to prove the thesis)?
·Can the thesis be adequately developed in the required length of the paper or project?
How to write a good thesis
1.Rank with justification　
2.Contrasts (of perspectives of sources)
从反对观点出发
Although newspapers at the time claimed ……, the most significant cause/explanation/reason, etc. is ……
While Sb. and Sb. maintains that  ................, more accurately/importantly, etc, X's position is the stronger one. (Substitute "most historians" for  So and So and the appropriate person or view or source for X)
3.Perception versus reality;
Although Turner himself may have believed X, the real causes were Y and Z.(再次强调事实说话)
4.Good versus bad reasons:
Historians generally list six reasons as the cause for X, but among these are four that are valid and two that are not.
5. Cause and Effect:
·Certainly, X was the cause and Y was its effect, but between the two are two other factors of equal importance.
·Separately the causes would have not necessarily led to a rampage; however, together their effect was inevitably murderous.  （千里之堤毁于蚁穴？）
·Although the effects of the rampage were . . ., the causes were understandable/justifiable/inevitable.
·The more important effects of Nat Turner's rebellion went beyond those of  the local rampage.
6.Challenge:
Nat Turner's rebellion not a righteous response to the injustice of slavery; it was motivated purely by disturbing psychological issues.   （这个我没太明白=。=）
【知识小补充】

Nat Turner’s Rebellion

　　1831年8月在美国弗吉尼亚州爆发的由N.特纳领导的反奴隶制起义。特纳1800年10月2日生于弗吉尼亚州南安普敦县，为该地种植园主B.特纳的黑人奴隶，浸信会传教士。他认为反对奴隶制是上帝的旨意，利用宗教活动团结了大批黑人奴隶。1831年8月21日在南安普敦县发动起义，约有76名黑奴和自由黑人参加
。8月23日起义队伍遭到邻近地区派来的大批军队和民团的围攻，起义失败。随后约有28名黑人被逮捕审讯，16人被处决，另有100多名无辜黑人惨遭杀害。特纳逃亡后未能再集合支持者。10月31日被捕，11月5日被判绞刑，11日就义。

　　这次起义导致南部奴隶主在立法上加强对黑人奴隶的压迫。他们颁布了一系列禁止黑人受教育，不准黑人集会等新禁令。

7.提出系列问题：
·
What should the audience/reader do/feel/believe?

·        Who are the major players on both/each side and how did they contribute to?(抓住主要人物)
·        Which are the most important? （分清主次）
·        What was the impact of?
·        Can I compare? How is X like or unlike Y?（联想第一讲）
·        What if?  Can I predict?（可以？）
·        How could we solve/improve/design/deal with?
·        Is there a better solution to?
·        How can you defend?
·        What changes would you recommend to?
·        Was it effective, justified, defensible, warranted? （考虑得好周到）
·        Why did this happen?Why did it succeed?Why did it fail?
·        What should be? What are/would be the possible outcomes of?
·        What are the problems related to?
·        What were the motives behind?
·        Why are the opponents protesting?
·        What is my personal response to?
·        What case can I make for?
·        What is the significance of?
·        Where will the next move(s) occur?
·        How is this debate likely to affect?
·        What is the value or, what is/are the potential benefit(s) of?
·        What are three/four/five reasons for us to believe?
Thesis Brainstorming
As you read look for:

• Interesting contrasts or comparisons or patterns emerging in the information
• Is there something about the topic that surprises you?
• Do you encounter ideas that make you wonder why?
• Does something an "expert" says make you respond, "no way! That can be right!" or "Yes, absolutely. I agree!"

As you read you may discover evidence that may affect your stance. It is okay to revise your thesis!（flexible,前面提到过）
Create a list of sample questions to guide your research:

• How many hours of television does the average young child watch per week? （数据）
• How do we identify a "violent" program?
• Which types of programs are most violent? （定义分类）
• Are there scientific research studies that have observed children before and after watching violent programs? （证据）
• Are there experts you might contact? （证据）
• Which major groups are involved in investigating this question? （可信度）

总结：

Thesis 要求强有力的观点，并且观点不空，具象而不抽象，需要事实根据并证明其可信度，要有可讨论的空间，足以引起人的兴趣，并引导全文。简言之，务实而非务虚，重内容而非形式。

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终于把昨天的笔记补齐了，今天看了些论文资料，没有背单词，心中惶惶然。
学习了草木MM的7-11讲。
感觉时间还是很紧张，不知道是不是无法平衡英语学习时间和论文写作时间的关系，计划的进度没能赶上。
自我反省ING

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来晚了，啥也不说了，上笔记。
第七讲笔记
Topic sentences reveal the main point of a paragraph. They show the relationship of each paragraph to the essay's thesis, telegraph the point of a paragraph, and tell your reader what to expect in the paragraph that follows. Topic sentences also establish their relevance right away, making clear why the points they're making are important to the essay's main ideas. They argue rather than report.
Signposts, as their name suggests, prepare the reader for a change in the argument's direction. They show how far the essay's argument has progressed vis-ˆ-vis the claims of the thesis.

Topic sentences and signposts occupy a middle ground in the writing process.

Forms of Topic Sentences
Sometimes topic sentences are actually two or even three sentences long. If the first makes a claim, the second might reflect on that claim, explaining it further. Think of these sentences as asking and answering two critical questions: How does the phenomenon you're discussing operate? Why does it operate as it does?
１．Complex sentences.
Topic sentences at the beginning of a paragraph frequently combine with a transition from the previous paragraph. This might be done by writing a sentence that contains both subordinate and independent clauses, as in the example below.（利用复合句，联系上下文的作用）
principle of transitions: always move from old to new information.
Although Young Woman with a Water Pitcher depicts an unknown, middle-class woman at an ordinary task（from old to new）, the image is more than "realistic"（how it works）; the painter [Vermeer] has imposed his own order upon it to strengthen it.(why)


２．Questions. Questions, sometimes in pairs, also make good topic sentences (and signposts).
eg: "Does the promise of stability justify this unchanging hierarchy?" We may fairly assume that the paragraph or section that follows will answer the question. Questions are by definition a form of inquiry, and thus demand an answer. Good essays strive for this forward momentum.


３．Bridge sentences.
Like questions, "bridge sentences" (the term is John Trimble's) make an excellent substitute for more formal topic sentences. Bridge sentences indicate both what came before and what comes next without the formal trappings of multiple clauses: "But there is a clue to this puzzle."


４．Pivots. Topic sentences don't always appear at the beginning of a paragraph.
When they come in the middle, they indicate that the paragraph will change direction, or "pivot." The pivot always needs a signal, a word like "but," "yet," or "however," or a longer phrase or sentence that indicates an about-face. It often needs more than one sentence to make its point.

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第八讲笔记段落关系
一、Climactic Order (Order of Importance)
In this pattern, items are arranged from least important to most important. Typical transitions would include more important, most difficult, still harder, by far the most expensive, even more damaging, worse yet, and so on. This is a flexible principle of organization, and may guide the organization of all or part of example, comparison & contrast, cause & effect, and description.
A variation of climactic order is called psychological order. In this pattern, then, you decide what is most important and put it at the beginning or the end; next you choose what is second most important and put it at the end or the beginning (whichever remains); the less important or powerful items are then arranged in the middle.（奇怪的排法=。=）
other principles of organization based on emphasis include
general-to-specific order,
specific-to general order,
most-familiar-to-least-familiar,
simplest-to-most-complex,
order of frequency,
order of familiarity（这几种方法理论上是很实用，但familiarity这样的顺序不是很好把握感觉）
对应连接词：
more importantly; best of all; still worse; a more effective approach; even more expensive; even more painful than passing a kidney stone; the least wasteful; occasionally, frequently, regularly（这个很实用）

二、
In an analysis of issues related to a topic, you can follow an ascending or climactic order, looking at smaller factors or arguments first, then moving up to the more crucial factors. Your last section could begin, "The most serious difficulty with…, however, is…" Ascending or climactic order adds power to a paper by leading the reader into increasing tension, much like an action movie builds to a climax. Resist giving away the most exciting parts of your paper early on – if you use up the good stuff early, you’ll have little left to keep the reader interested in the rest of what you have to say.

If you are comparing or contrasting two or more viewpoints, there are basically two ways to go about it.
If the two views you are discussing are relatively simple to explain and analyze, try a longitudinal method by which you discuss all aspects of view A and then moved on to discuss all aspects of view B.

三、
After you have formed your dominant impression into a thesis, make a plan to organize the relevant supporting details into three basic parts. Each part will comprise one Roman numeral of your outline and one paragraph of the body of your paper.

四、
Another way to organize is by cause and effect: if A caused B, discuss A first, then B.
Still another way is to organize by problem then solution. State the problem first, then give your proposed solution.
Remember: Out of order paragraphs and essays are hard to read and understand.

如何处理复杂顺序
１．三“W”法：Answering Questions:
The Parts of an Essay
"What?"
The first question to anticipate from a reader is "what": What evidence shows that the phenomenon described by your thesis is true?
"How?"
A reader will also want to know whether the claims of the thesis are true in all cases. The corresponding question is "how": How does the thesis stand up to the challenge of a counter-argument? How does the introduction of new material—a new way of looking at the evidence, another set of sources—affect the claims you're making?
"Why?"
Your reader will also want to know what's at stake in your claim: Why does your interpretation of a phenomenon matter to anyone beside you?
2、Mapping an Essay
*
State your thesis in a sentence or two, then write another sentence saying why it's important to make that claim.
*
Begin your next sentence like this: "To be convinced by my claim, the first thing a reader needs to know is . . ." Then say why that's the first thing a reader needs to know, and name one or two items of evidence you think will make the case. This will start you off on answering the "what" question. (Alternately, you may find that the first thing your reader needs to know is some background information.)
*
Begin each of the following sentences like this: "The next thing my reader needs to know is . . ."
Once again, say why, and name some evidence. Continue until you've mapped out your essay.

Your map should naturally take you through some preliminary answers to the basic questions of what, how, and why. It is not a contract, though—the order in which the ideas appear is not a rigid one. Essay maps are flexible; they evolve with your ideas.

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第九讲笔记 段落内部关系
这一讲让我受益颇多，个人非常喜欢，和第十讲联系紧密。
一、
一、段落的基本概念
这里注意段落基本的三要素：
1、
一个独立的观点－和Thesis密切相关
2、
一个合理的逻辑顺序
3、
没有无关细节
The structure of a paragraph parallels the structure of an essay in order as well as content.
段落的长短问题：
An essay is like a girl's skirt-it should be long enough to cover the topic(body) and short enough to be interesting!
二、段落的组成结构：
1、
The topic sentence
2、
Supporting evidence/analysis
3、
The conclusion(observation)（结论在文章的最后一句或者倒数第二句，结论句除了总结上文的论述还要在总结上做好向下一个分论点的过渡）
三、段落组成的内容：
内容基本原则：
·
Orient your reader to the subject.
·
Tie your ideas together.
·
Take it easy through technically dense passages.
·
Arrange your ideas in a logical sequence.
如何让读者知道你下一步怎么写：
（１）
USE ORIENTING WORDS AND PHRASES：
Here are a few orienting words and phrases you can use to introduce familiar concepts and to make your readers comfortable by touching base with things they already know:
·
of course
·
as you know
·
until now
·
obviously
·
normally
·
previously
·
everyone is familiar with
·
remember that
（这个很实用）

（１）
LET THE NEW AMPLIFY THE OLD：
As you link the old with the new, avoid the traditional chronological approach that lists the old things before the new. Usually, you are interested in the old merely as a contrast with the new.

（２）
ADD EXPLANATORY WORDS AND PHRASES：
Often, when you are introducing new ideas, you will have to expand and clarify them with definitions and explanatory material. Generally, the more complex the ideas you have to present, the more explanatory material you will need.
To decide how much explanatory material you need, you have to form a clear picture of your audience and how familiar they are with what you're saying. In general, it's a good idea to put in more explanations than you think you need, because your writing is often read by people outside your expected audience. （让我想起了白居易）
四、段内句子连接：
注意三个原则：
l
Unity-所有句子讲同一个主题
l
Coherence－句子之间相互关联，共同构成有机整体
l
Connection－适当的连接句子

（一）   一、利用逻辑连接词连接段落
（一）利用逻辑连接词连接段落：
Connective words that describe relationships:
Connective words that describe relationships:

ALSO	HOWEVER	ALTHOUGH
INCIDENTALLY	THEREFORE	BESIDES
LIKEWISE	THUS	MEANWHILE
MOREOVER	USUALLY	FURTHERMORE
NEXT	WHATEVER	GENERALLY
YET	ACCORDINGLY	NEVERTHELESS
INSTEAD	IN CONTRAST	FOR EXAMPLE

Connectives that give a sense of time:

FIRST	SECONDLY
FINALLY	NOW
ONCE	WHEN
ULTIMATELY	EVENTUALLY
LASTLY	LATER
MEANWHILE	PREVIOUSLY
THEN	SOON
FORMERLY	SOMETIMES

Other Connective phrases:

TO BEGIN WITH	ON THE OTHER HAND
IN BRIEF	IN GENERAL
IN SUMMARY	MORE SPECIFICALLY
INSTEAD OF	IN ADDITION TO
IN OTHER WORDS	ANOTHER WAY TO
FOR THE SAME REASON	NO MATTER WHAT
SUCH A	THAT'S WHAT (WHY)
IN FACT	WHAT'S MORE
IN THE SAME WAY	ON THE CONTRARY
CONVERSELY	AS A RESULT
SUMMING UP	IF SO / NOT

（一）
利用重复
TRY TO HAVE A WORD OR PHRASE SOMEWHERE IN EACH SENTENCE THAT REFERS TO SOMETHING IN A PREVIOUS SENTENCE.
１．One easy way to follow this principle is to use pronominal adjectives like these to refer to nouns in previous sentences:
THIS THAT THESE WHICH THEIR HIS ITS HER
（这点对我非常有用，会让句子看起来连接紧密。只是这个对我来说还是弱项，需要加强）
２．Another way to assure continuity in your writing is simple repetition; that is, carry the same nouns from one sentence to the next.（例子很好，值得借鉴）
３．Another way to tie ideas together is with intensives.
The whale is by far the largest living mammal. In fact, the largest whales weigh as much as 150 tons and grow as long as 100 feet. These enormous animals consume 5 tons of food each day.（很经典）
useful intensives:

ESPECIALLY	AS MUCH AS	EVEN IF/THOUGH
INCREASINGLY	BY FAR	SO...THAT
MORE IMPORTANTLY	HIGHLY	ONLY
PARTICULARLY	IN FACT	VERY
SIGNIFICANTLY	QUITE	SUCH
MOST	UNIQUE	AT ALL
ABOVE ALL	INDEED	IN ANY CASE

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第十讲笔记，如何有效利用论据
（１）
Offer evidence that agrees with your stance up to a point, then add to it with ideas of your own.
（２）
Present evidence that contradicts your stance in order to argue against (refute) it and therefore strengthen your position
（３）
Use sources against each other, as if they are experts on a panel discussing your proposition
（４）
Use quotations to support your assertion, not merely to state or restate your claim. Weak and Strong Uses of Evidence
Discussing your evidence’s significance develops and expands a paper，Remember that your job during the course of your essay is to persuade your readers that your claims are feasible and the most effective way of interpreting the evidence

Questions to Ask Yourself When Revising Your Paper
1) Do I avoid generalizing in my paper by specifically explaining how my evidence is representative?
2) Have I offered my reader evidence to substantiate each assertion I make in my paper?
3) Do I thoroughly explain why/how my evidence backs up my ideas?
4) Do I provide evidence that not only confirms but also qualifies my paper’s main claims?
5) Do I use evidence to test and evolve my ideas, rather than to just confirm them?
6) Do I cite my sources thoroughly and correctly?
（依旧有一个强悍的例子来说明如何论证，首尾都有明显的点明中心的句子，每个句子都有逻辑的连接词汇，结合第九讲的段落内部关系）

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第十一讲笔记，怎么写conclusion

Strategies for Writing a Conclusion

A conclusion should

• stress the importance of the thesis statement, （首尾呼应，重现主题句）
• give the essay a sense of completeness, and （完善）
• leave a final impression on the reader.（这一点好难，开头和结尾一样都要深刻的impression）

Suggestions

1、Answer the question "So What?"
Show your readers why this paper was important. Show them that your paper was meaningful and useful.

2、Synthesize, don't summarize

Don't simply repeat things that were in your paper. They have read it. Show them how the points you made and the support and examples you used were not random, but fit together.（再现主题）

3、
Redirect your readers

Give your reader something to think about, perhaps a way to use your paper in the "real" world. If your introduction went from general to specific, make your conclusion go from specific to general. Think globally. Propose a course of action, a solution to an issue, or questions for further study. This can redirect your reader's thought process and help her to apply your info and ideas to her own life or to see the broader implications.

4、
Create a new meaning

You don't have to give new information to create a new meaning. By demonstrating how your ideas work together, you can create a new picture. Often the sum of the paper is worth more than its parts. （我很喜欢这段话）

5、
Point to broader implications.

Strategies

Echoing the introduction: Echoing your introduction can be a good strategy if it is meant to bring the reader full-circle. If you begin by describing a scenario, you can end with the same scenario as proof that your essay was helpful in creating a new understanding.

• Challenging the reader
• Looking to the future（合理推论）
• Posing questions（如果写论文的话这种方式的conclusion最好用）

Strategies to Avoid

·
Beginning with an unnecessary, overused phrase such as "in conclusion," "in summary," or "in closing." Although these phrases can work in speeches, they come across as wooden and trite in writing.（我喜欢用to sum up 囧）
·
Stating the thesis for the very first time in the conclusion.
·
Introducing a new idea or subtopic in your conclusion.
·
Ending with a rephrased thesis statement without any substantive changes.
·
Making sentimental, emotional appeals (out of character with the rest of an analytical paper).
·
Including evidence (quotations, statistics, etc.) that should be in the body of the paper.
Four Kinds of Ineffective Conclusions
1、The "That's My Story and I'm Sticking to It" Conclusion.

2. The "Sherlock Holmes” Conclusion.

3、The "America the Beautiful"/"I Am Woman"/"We Shall Overcome" Conclusion.

4、The "Grab Bag" Conclusion. This kind of conclusion includes extra information that the writer found or thought of but couldn't integrate into the main paper.

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第十二讲笔记CONCISENESS : METHODS OF ELIMINATING WORDINESS
1.
Eliminate unnecessary determiners and modifiers
句子需要简洁明了，能够充分表达意思就可以，但是常犯的毛病就是凑字数，虽然字数上去了，但是质量却下来了，给人累赘的感觉，得不偿失。

some words and phrases that can often be pruned away to make sentences clearer:

kind of sort of type of really basically for all intents and purposes

definitely actually generally individual specific particular

（实用啊实用）
2.
Change phrases into single words
Using phrases to convey meaning that could be presented in a single word contributes to wordiness. Convert phrases into single words when possible.
看过例子才明白这个方法的意义，可以用准确简洁的词语代替那些冗长的短语确实会为文章增色不少。

3. Change unnecessary that, who, and which clauses into phrases

Using a clause to convey meaning that could be presented in a phrase or even a word contributes to wordiness. Convert modifying clauses into phrases or single words when possible.（我就经常喜欢用that,who and which这样的句子，看来是个坏毛病）

4.
Avoid overusing expletives at the beginning of sentences
Expletives are phrases of the form it + be-verb or there + be-verb. Such expressions can be rhetorically effective for emphasis in some situations, but overuse or unnecessary use of expletive constructions creates wordy prose.(It is imperative that we find a solution.用来强调，不必省略)

5. Use active rather than passive verbs

See our document on active and passive voice for a more thorough explanation of this topic.（尽量用主动）

6. Avoid overusing noun forms of verbs

Use verbs when possible rather than noun forms known as nominalizations（名词化）. Sentences with many nominalizations usually have forms of be as the main verbs. Using the action verbs disguised in nominalizations as the main verbs--instead of forms of be--can help to create engaging rather than dull prose.

7. Reword unnecessary infinitive phrases

Some infinitive phrases can be converted into finite verbs or brief noun phrases. Making such changes also often results in the replacement of a be-verb with an action verb.（与其说是精简词汇不如说是对词语运用的更高考验）

8. Replace circumlocutions with direct expressions

Circumlocutions(遁词) are commonly used roundabout expressions that take several words to say what could be said more succinctly. We often overlook them because many such expressions are habitual figures of speech. In writing, though, they should be avoided since they add extra words without extra meaning. Of course, occasionally you may for rhetorical effect decide to use, say, an expletive construction instead of a more succinct expression. These guidelines should be taken as general recommendations, not absolute rules.（要求不要说绝对言论，但对已知的准确问题也不能含糊其辞说得太过笼统=。=这个度有点难把握）

some other common circumlocutions that can be compressed into just one word:

the reason for for the reason that owing/due to the fact that in light of the fact that considering the fact that on the grounds that this is why	=because, since, why
on the occasion of in a situation in which under circumstances in which	=when
as regards in reference to with regard to concerning the matter of where ________ is concerned	=about
it is crucial that it is necessary that there is a need/necessity for it is important that cannot be avoided	=must, should
is able to has the opportunity to has the capacity for has the ability to	=can
it is possible that there is a chance that it could happen that the possibility exists for	=may, might, could

9. Omit words that explain the obvious or provide excessive detail

Be sure always to consider your readers as you draft and revise your writing. If you find passages that explain or describe in detail what would already be obvious to readers, delete or reword them.（就可讨论的问题讨论in depth，而非纠缠于显而易见的东西）

10. Omit repetitive wording

Watch for phrases or longer passages in your writing in which you repeat words with similar meanings.

Redundant Pairs
（avoid）

past memories various differences each individual_______ basic fundamentals true facts important essentials future plans

terrible tragedy end result final outcome free gift past history unexpected surprise sudden crisis

Redundant Categories

large in size often times of a bright color heavy in weight period in time round in shape at an early time economics field

of cheap quality honest in character of an uncertain condition in a confused state unusual in nature extreme in degree of a strange type

(经常会犯的弱智错误=。=)

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第十三——十五讲PROOFREADING笔记

Proofreading for Commas

Compound Sentence Commas

1. Skim your paper, looking only for the seven coordinating conjunctions:

and, nor, but, so, for, or, and yet.

2. Stop at each of these words to see whether there is an independent clause (a complete sentence), on both sides of it. (For more help, see our handout on independent clauses.)

3. If so, place a comma before the coordinating conjunction（并列连词前加逗号）

Comma Splices
If you have an independent clause (a sentence) on both sides of the comma.
1.reword the sentence to change one clause into a subordinate (or dependent) clause (see our handout on dependent clauses)
2.add a coordinating conjunction after the comma
3.replace the comma with a semicolon
4.replace the comma with a period, question mark, or exclamation point, and capitalize the first word of the second clause

Introductory Commas

Introductory commas after dependent clauses

1. Skim your paper, looking only at the first two or three words of each sentence.

2. Stop if one of these words is a dependent marker such as while, because, when, if, after, when, etc. (see our Commas After Introductions).

3. If necessary, place a comma at the end of the introductory dependent clause.

Other introductory commas

1. Skim your paper, looking only at the first word or two of each sentence.

2. Stop if the word or phrase . . .

·ends in -ing

·is an infinitive (to + verb)

·is an introductory word (well, yes, moreover, etc.)

3. Place a comma at the end of the introductory phrase.

4. If the sentence begins with a prepositional phrase (a phrase beginning with in, at, on, between, with, etc.), place a comma after the prepositional phrase if it is longer than three words or suggests a distinct pause before the main clause.

Disruptive Commas

For disruptive commas between compound verbs or objects

1. Skim your paper, stopping only at the coordinating conjunctions: and, or, nor, but, so, for, or, and yet.

2. Check to see whether there is an independent clause (sentence) on both sides of the conjunction. If so, place a comma before the conjunction. If not, do not place a comma before the conjunction.（注意要有两个独立的句子在连词两边）

For disruptive commas between subjects and verbs

1. Find the subject and verb in each of your sentences.

2. Make sure that you have not separated the subject from the verb with one comma. It's often all right to have a pair of commas between a subject and verb for nonessential clauses and phrases that might be added there, but rarely is a single comma acceptable.

Series Commas

系列并列词语短语间用逗号隔开

Commas with Nonessential Elements

1. Skim your paper, looking for a phrase or clause in each sentence that explains or gives more information about a word or phrase that comes before it.

2. If you can delete the phrase or clause and still keep the meaning, the phrase or clause is probably nonessential and needs two commas, one before and one after (unless the phrase or clause is at the end of the sentence).

3. As an alternate test for a nonessential phrase or clause, try saying "by the way" before it. If that seems appropriate to the meaning, the phrase or clause is probably nonessential. （感觉这个用法有点像中文的两个破折号，中间做补充说明的成分，而去掉它依旧是一个有完整意思的句子）

Summary:

Finding Common ErrorsProofreading can be much easier when you know what you are looking for. Although everyone will have different error patterns, the following are issues that come up for many writers. When proofreading your paper, be on the lookout for these errors. Always remember to make note of what errors you make frequently—this will help you proofread more efficiently in the future!（做个错误笔记倒是个不错的办法）

Left-out and doubled wordsReading the paper aloud (and slowly) can help you make sure you haven't missed or repeated any words.（这是我经常使用的方法）

Make sure each sentence has a subject.

Make sure each sentence has a complete verb.

See that each sentence has an independent clause; remember that a dependent clause cannot stand on its own.

注意关系连词的使用。

Pronoun Reference/Agreement（如果句子中没有名词，把代词换掉，如果有，确保代词使用正确）

Two Principles

·Begin sentences with short, simple words and phrases that a) communicate information that appeared in previous sentences, or b) build on knowledge that you share with your reader.

·In a paragraph, keep your topics short and reasonably consistent.

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第十六讲笔记Metaphors
个人非常喜欢这一讲，因为以前学的写作大多是八股文写作方式，对比喻之类的修辞问题很少涉及，学过之后，受益匪浅。
Using Metaphors in Creative Writing

Related terms

extended or telescoping metaphor: A sustained metaphor.	The teacher descended upon the exams, sank his talons into their pages, ripped the answers to shreds, and then, perching in his chair, began to digest.
implied metaphor: A less direct metaphor.	John swelled and ruffled his plumage (versus John was a peacock)
mixed metaphor: The awkward, often silly use of more than one metaphor at a time. To be avoided!	The movie struck a spark that massaged the audience's conscience.
dead metaphor: A commonly used metaphor that has become over time part of ordinary language.	tying up loose ends, a submarine sandwich, a branch of government, and most clichés
simile: A comparison using "like" or "as"	Her face was pale as the moon.
metonym: The substitution of one term for another with which it is commonly associated or closely related.（换喻）	the pen is mightier than the sword, the crown (referring to a Queen or King), hands (referring to workers who use their hands),
synecdoche: The substitution of a part for the whole or vice versa (a kind of metonym).提喻	give us this day our daily bread

（实在很喜欢这个表格，个人比较偏向后三种较为常见的比喻形式，大爱最后一种）

Why use metaphors?
They enliven ordinary language.（生动活泼）

They are generous to readers and listeners; they encourage interpretation.（提高读者兴趣）
They are more efficient and economical than ordinary language; they give maximum meaning with a minimum of words.
（形象说明要比道理说明更易接受更充分表达）
They create new meanings; they allow you to write about feelings, thoughts, things, experiences, etc. for which there are no easy words; they are necessary.
They are a sign of genius.

Creative ways to use metaphors
In your poetry (and fiction for that matter) you can do much more than say X is Y（就是个公式）, like an algebraic formula. Definitely play with extended metaphors and experiment with some of the following, using metaphors...

as verbs	The news that ignited his face snuffed out her smile.
as adjectives and adverbs	Her carnivorous pencil carved up Susan's devotion.
as prepositional phrases	The doctor inspected the rash with a vulture's eye.
as appositives or modifiers	On the sidewalk was yesterday's paper, an ink-stained sponge.

（很好很强大）
很经典的例子，不得不留下来(so beautiful)：
1. Scratching at the window with claws of pine, the wind wants in.
2. What a thrill--my thumb instead of an onion. The top quite gone except for a sort of hinge of skin....A celebration this is. Out of a gap a million soldiers run, redcoats every one.
3. The clouds were low and hairy in the skies, like locks blown forward in the gleam of eyes.
4. Little boys lie still, awake wondering, wondering delicate little boxes of dust.