作文本1.21更新到今天！(低落)

BriaIFUID: 2515589

Nowadays, there is a heated discussion with sharply soaring volume about homework. Some individuals hold the view that teachers (should?) assign homework to students every day. However, from my perspective, daily homework is not necessary for students to finish every day (cuz you already mentioned it's "daily" homework, so "every day" could just be omitted~). My reasons are as following.

To begin with, the reason why students go to school is to learn skills and knowledge rather than bring(bringing) back homework to their home. In fact, doing homework is a mean(is that usage correct? or "means"? anyway, to avoid confusion, you could just say "a good way" instead^^) of(means/way/approach to doing sth, rather than "of") reviewing what students have learned in today's lesson. Therefore, if teachers can instruct students well, all of content should be accepted by students. In this situation, there is no necessary for teachers teaching students well to assign homework. On the contrary, teachers who cannot teach students well like to assign homework to students, because they know that only repeated training can make up their insufficient teaching ability. Therefore, most of teachers should improve their ability rather than assign homework to their students.

In addition, daily homework occupies every student' free time which should have been arranged for sports or making friends. When students' free time is teemed by(good word!) homework, students' interest for knowledge will depleted. According to a survey by University of Virginia, some professors and experts point out those 80% college students dislike daily homework. The original objective of assigning homework is to help students' studying and developing(study and development), but the irrefutable fact is most of students dislike homework, not (to) mention daily homework. Even though teachers assign homework every hour to students, students may refuse to submit homework. Students' interest for knowledge playing a crucial role in our studying life is mot(?) cultured by homework(I can't understand this sentence...). The more homework students need to do, the less interest students(they,as "students" already appeared in the former part of the sentence)obtain. Hence, daily homework is not necessary for students.

Nevertheless, sometimes, teachers should assign little homework for students, but it is harmful for students to do homework every day.

To sum up, based on what I have mentioned, I deem that daily homework is not necessary for students to finish every day. (this para can actually be merged with the previous one)

Good job~Go on!
P.S. sorry there's some error in my typing system, so I just corrected your essay in English directly.

蔓落UID: 2779470

Many teachers assign homework to students every day. Do you think that daily homework is necessary for students?

Nowadays, there is a heated discussion with sharply soaring volume about homework. Some individuals hold the view that teachers (should) assign homework to students every day. However, from my perspective, daily homework is not necessary for students to finish every day. My reasons are as following.

To begin with, the reason why students go to school is to learn skills and knowledge rather than bring back homework to their home. In fact, doing homework is a mean of reviewing what students have learned in today's lesson. Therefore, if teachers can instruct students well, all of content should be accepted by students. In this situation, there is no necessary for teachers teaching students well to assign homework. On the contrary, teachers who cannot teach students well like to assign homework to students, because they know that only repeated training can make up their insufficient teaching ability. Therefore, most of teachers should improve their ability rather than assign homework to their students.

In addition, daily homework occupies every student' free time which should have been arranged for sports or making friends. When students' free time is teemed by homework, students' interest for knowledge will depleted. According to a survey by University of Virginia, some professors and experts point out those 80% college students dislike daily homework. The original objective of assigning homework is to help students' studying and developing, but the irrefutable fact is most of students dislike homework, not mention daily homework. Even though teachers assign homework every hour(?) to students, students may refuse to submit homework. Students' interest for knowledge playing a crucial role in our studying life is mot cultured by homework. The more homework students need to do, the less interest students obtain. Hence, daily homework is not necessary for students.

Nevertheless, sometimes, teachers should assign little homework for students, but it is harmful for students to do homework every day.

To sum up, based on what I have mentioned, I deem that daily homework is not necessary for students to finish every day.
楼主的文章很简单但是基本上是没有错误的~我觉得楼主的第一个观点有点过于绝对。。。
向楼主学习~加油~~~

lily@@UID: 2661882

homework to students every day. Do you think that daily homework is necessary for students
Nowadays, there is a heated discussion with sharply soaring volume about homework. Some individuals hold the view that teachers assign homework to students every day. However, from my perspective, daily homework is not necessary for students to finish every day. (貌似有点重复，换成there is no need to assign homework to students every day 怎么样？）My reasons are as following
To begin with, the reason why students go to school is to learn skills and knowledge rather than brin(加ging） back homework (to their home自己觉得去掉这个句子会更加有力） In fact, doing homework is a mean of reviewing what students have learned in today's lesson. Therefore, if teachers can instruct students well, all of content should be accepted by students. In this situation, there is no （换成名词necessity） for teachers (who teach students well 用从句更能体现对于老师的分类吧）to assign homework. On the contrary, teachers who cannot teach students well like to assign homework to students, because they know that only repeated training can make up their insufficient teaching ability. Therefore, most of teachers should improve their ability rather than assign homework to their students.
In addition, daily homework occupies every student' free time which should have been arranged （窃窃地以为spared是不是更好，空出来的）for sports or making friends. When students' free time is teemed by homework, students' interest for knowledge will depleted. According to a survey by University of Virginia, some professors and experts point out those 80% college students dislike daily homework. The original objective of assigning homework is to help （students study and develop）, but the irrefutable fact is （that） most of students dislike homework, not （to） mention daily homework. Even though（按照句意，应该去掉though 吧） teachers assign homework every hour to students, students may refuse to submit homework. Students' interest for knowledge playing a crucial role in our studying life is mot cultured by homework. (没明白这句话，是不是这个意思Anyway, students' interest in gaining knowledge is dramatically reduced by endless homework.)The more homework students need to do, the less interest students obtain. Hence, daily homework is not necessary for students.（窃窃以为可以将结尾句强势一下Hence, daily homework does no good but harm to students' interest in gaining knowledge.)Nevertheless, sometimes, teachers should assign （a） little homework for students, but it is harmful for students to do homework every day.
To sum up, based on what I have mentioned, I deem that daily homework is not necessary for students to finish every day.

第一个论点很有新意啊，赞一下~

amanda_qinyyUID: 2632170

4.22 修改by 暧暧

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missyoucrazyUID: 2745188

Nowadays, there is a heated discussion with sharply soaring volume about education. Some individuals hold the view that students should learn basic science classes even if they are not this major. However, from my perspective, it is no necessary for students to be required to take basic science classes. My reasons are as following.
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! a$ ]2 W! z; j7 LTo begin with, people have various goals in their different phases, but it is certain that getting jobs is most people's final goals. The reason why more and more people desire to come to the college to study is that students want to grasp a special skill for hunting a job. Hence, universities should provide students with more and more major courses to help them be familiar with their majors' knowledge and theory. Thus, when students finish their courses, they can easily find positions which are correlated with their majors. However, if all students should be required to take basic science classes, it is wasting their time and energy for those students whose major is not basic science. Actually, they should devote their all of time and energy on their majors, which will bring them bright futures or suitable job offers, because basic science only can produce few influence on students' working. Therefore, students should study their majors' courses rather than basic science.& _9 e3 c$ [1 Y
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In addition, studying pressure from major courses is so huge that many students cannot tolerate. According to a survey by University Virginia, some experts and professors point out that 78% students in American are suffering by studying pressure. Even 5% students deem that their lives teem with homework and presentations. At the moment, if universities demand students to take basic science classes, it is no doubt that these courses will increase students' burden. In other words, the free time which students can take advantage of becomes less and less. It is impossible for any student to always focus on studying. For example, I like playing chess when I have free time. Every times when I feel tired on studying, I will play chess. After I play chess, I can continue to study. In a nutshell, students need free time to release their studying pressure.(感觉free time 的论述说服力不是很强，毕竟free time 和taking basic science 也不是完全对立的两方面 )
Nevertheless, basic science indeed plays a crucial role in some students' academic life. But compared with students' free time and students' jobs, the importance of basic science is bound to diminish.: h: l/ j. Y$ S. _8 I' u
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To sum up, based on what I have mentioned, I believe that all students should not be required to take basic science classes.


楼主语言功底很强啊，语言简洁，思路清晰。学习了~~

canoe03UID: 2786666

Nowadays, there is a heated discussion with sharply soaring volume about education. Some individuals hold the view that students should learn basic science classes even if they are not this major. However, from my perspective, it is no necessary for students to be required to take basic science classes. My reasons are as following.

To begin with, every people(此处表达貌似有点问题) have various goals in their different phases, but it is certain that getting jobs is most of people's final goals. The reason why more and more people desire to come to the college to study is that students want to grasp a special skill for hunting a job. Hence, universities should provide students more and more major courses to help them to be familiar with their majors' knowledge and theory(此两词似有重叠之嫌). Thus, when students finish their courses, they can easily find positions which are correlated with their majors(事实上，是专业课学得多导致工作的好找吗？). However, if all students should be required to take basic science classes, it is wasting their time and energy for those students whose major is not basic science. Actually, they should devote their all of time and energy on their majors(这里和下文是矛盾的，下文说要花时间来relax，这里又说要花所有精力来学专业课)which will bring them bright futures or suitable job offers, because basic science only can produce few influence on students' working. Therefore, students should study their majors' courses rather than basic science.

In addition, studying pressure from major courses is so huge that many students cannot tolerate. According to a survey by University Virginia, some experts and professors point out that 78% students in American are suffering by studying pressure. Even 5% students deem that their lives teem with homework and presentations. At the moment, if universities demand students to take basic science classes, it is no doubt that these courses will increase students' burden. In other words, the free time which students can take advantage of becomes less and less. It is impossible for any student to always focus(always focusing) on studying. For example, I like playing chess when I have free time. Every times(every time) when I feel tired on studying, I will play chess. After I play chess(念起来这里有点重复，关于play chess), I can continue to study. In a nutshell, students need free time to release their studying pressure.

Nevertheless, basic science indeed plays a crucial role in some students' academic life. But compared with students' free time and students' jobs, the importance of basic science is bound to diminish.

To sum up, based on what I have mentioned, I believe that all students should not be required to take basic science classes.
(楼主的句子和语法都很好，但是支持论点的论据比较弱，特别是文章中还有自相矛盾的地方，我觉得这是大部分的人的弱点，论证的过程相当弱。举的例子都是很容易被反驳的，楼主那个University Virginia的例子不知道是不是真的，也有可能78%的学生深受其害的正是占了很大一块的basic science classes。说个和题目不搭嘎的话，我个人觉得楼主关于这个题目站错了立场，当然托福作文考试可能不会考虑这点。如同现在大家都说理工科学生有知识没文化，如果文科学生不具有基本的自然科学素养，这是不能接受的，所以说一些基本的科学知识还是要具备的，这就是为什么像“万物简史”这样的科普书籍得以流行的原因。斗胆了，见谅，嗬嗬

lycheeeUID: 2447890

Nowadays, there is a heated discussion with sharply soaring volume（这样的描述会不会太过……？） about whether businessmen are only motivated by desire of money. Some individuals agree with the statement. However, from my perspective, interests and responsibility also spur businessmen to work(spur to work这词好）. My reasons are as following.

To begin with, some businessmen are motivated by their interests. Every people have their own interest. When one person devotes his time and energy on （应该是devote to这样搭配的吧？）his interest, he will regard his interest as his career. Finally he becomes a businessman. For example, Bill gates, who is the most successful businessman in the world, established Microsoft software company by himself. When he gave up studying at Harvard University, he decided to try his best to design software, because he realized designing software is his real interest. Now, even though he has been a pretty successful businessman, he still devotes his time and energy on software. If Bill gates is encouraged by desire of money, why did he give up his studying at Harvard University?（这句话的用意不是很明确，留在哈佛不等于挣钱吧……？如果表达成“如果他仅仅想挣钱的话，为什么他现在还在写程序？”） If Bill gates really desires to acquire more and more money, it is hard to explain the reason why he who has possess too much money sticks to work on software.（这句话更不明白了……） Therefore, businessmen sometimes are motivated by their interests. （不如反面论述一句、正面论述一句：“如果他做生意仅仅是为了赚钱的话，那为什么在生意成功的今天依然在写程序呢？正是因为他太喜欢写程序了，所以他才……”）

In addition, businessmen also are encouraged by their responsibility. For instance, my father is a businessman who runs a state-own company. It is universally acknowledged that the state-own company is the public property, which is uncorrelated with my father, but my father always works hard. I usually see my father staying for one night to consider a plan（通宵是stay up the night.这句改成he always considering plans all through the night如何？). Once, I asked my father the reason（the reason可以去掉） why he works hard? （改为句号）My father told me that since the company is the（the去掉） public property, he should shoulder the responsibility to manage the company. Otherwise he will feel very sorry for the public.（这……feel sorry用在这不合适吧……人死了才feel sorry的……汗。不如用feel guilty。不过不管怎样改都很奇怪……不如不要这个otherwise改成正面描述的另一句好了……） Hence, from my experience, I can conclude that responsibility is an important incentive（incentive用得不错） for businessmen.
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To sum up, based on what I have mentioned, hardly can I agree with those people opinion that businessmen are only motivated by desire of money. I believe that interests and responsibility also spur businessmen to work.

呃，楼主是不是写得很赶……感觉逻辑有点混乱，用词也有点问题（主要是feel sorry比较雷人……） 不过在表达motivate的时候用了spur to, incentive, encourage,（我就从头motivate到尾……T T） 我查了下还有spur on doing sth, offer an inducement to do sth， 楼主可以换一下用免得第一段和最后一段有一句话几乎是完全重复的……

canoe03UID: 2786666

Nowadays, there is a heated discussion with sharply soaring volume about whether it is essential for the young people to have the ability to plan and organize. In my perspective, the more complex modern society has become the more crucial role the ability to plan and organize plays in the young people's life. My reasons are as following.

To begin with, ability to plan and organize should be vital for every people in dealing with their working, studying, and living. For example, my father is a manager working in the(an) international company. His responsibility which(which看起来有点突兀，要么在前面加个逗号或者去掉？) is to arrange workers to produce qualified goods, seems to(加个be或者去掉to) very simple. However, as a matter of fact, my father not only makes a precise plan to make(两个make，maybe制定计划可以说draw up a plan？后面也有work，换成perform试试看？) sure that every worker can work at his best status, but also organizes workers to solve some difficult problems. Except his(前面是my，这里变成了his楼主不要搞错父亲大人啦！) father's instance, I always exert ability to plan and organize in my studying. My college life teems with a host of homework assigned by different courses' teacher(我不知道这样写可不可以，楼主请斟酌，我想还是保守的写成teacher of different courses), so I must make a plan which can properly arrange time to finish different courses' homework. If I did not possess the ability to plan and organize, I would be suffered by such much homework. Therefore, ability to plan and organize is very important.

In addition, with our society and economy develops, our life becomes more and more complex. According to a survey by University of Virginia, 78% American deem their life is(lives are) more complex than those in(这两词多余了) 50 years ago. Now we have used the ability to plan and organize to overcome problems we encountering. Since our life will be more complex(怎么生出这句话来的，楼主要做个解释才好), we will confront with more and more complex tasks, homework and challenges. Hence, we acquire stronger the(the不需要，strong 表达的不是很地道，用better或more great？) ability to plan and organize. In other words, the ability to plan and organize becomes more and more essential. To sum up, based on what I have mentioned, I argue that it is essential for the young people to have the ability to plan and organize.

(可能是楼主去看世博挤昏了头，这篇文章大不如前面。文章有几处语法错误，用词重复率也比较高，论据明显不大充分。出现这种情况楼主应该是暂时的，注意休息哦！)

lycheeeUID: 2447890

268# jbc88

5.1Do you agree or disagree the following statement? Modern society has become more complex, so it is essential for the young people to have the ability to plan and organize.
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Nowadays, there is a heated discussion with sharply soaring volume about whether it is essential for the young people to have the ability to plan and organize. In my perspective, the more complex modern society has become the more crucial role the ability to plan and organize plays in the young people's life. My reasons are as following.. Q1 m* L1 F- v
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To begin with, ability to plan and organize should be vital for every people in dealing with their working, studying, and living. For example, my father is a manager working in the international company. His responsibility which is to arrange workers to produce qualified goods, seems to very simple. However, as a matter of fact, my father not only makes a precise plan to make sure that every worker can work at his best status, but also organizes workers to solve some difficult problems【这后半句表达的是organize的么】. Except his father's instance【呃？his?】, I always exert ability to plan and organize in my studying. My college life teems with a host of homework assigned by different courses' teacher【这句话有点费解……不如用assignments of different courses?另外teems with 和 host of貌似也很少形容作业，不如用个顺畅点的词？】, so I must make a plan which can properly arrange time to finish different courses' homework. If I did not possess the ability to plan and organize【另外，无论是exert the ability还是possess the ability，都有点奇怪（好像在使用技能一样，但计划和组织确切来说不是一种可以使用的技能啊）……为什么不直接用plan或organize的动词形式呢？换个词，比如用Manage，也看上去比较舒服些啊……】, I would be suffered by such much homework. Therefore, ability to plan and organize is very important.
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In addition, with our society and economy develops, our life becomes more and more complex. According to a survey by University of Virginia, 78% American deem their life is more complex than those in 50 years ago. Now we have used the ability to plan and organize to overcome problems we encountering. Since our life will be more complex, we will confront with more and more complex tasks, homework and challenges. Hence, we acquire stronger【？这里该怎么表述呢……？】 the ability to plan and organize. In other words, the ability to plan and organize becomes more and more essential. 【这个论述……“因为我们的社会变得复杂，所以我们会遇到越来越多复杂的事务。所以，我们要有更强大的计划和组织能力”。楼主是想表达这个意思么？如果是这样的话，还需要扩充一些detile才行……】
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( R: W- n  i; O, d/ x. c7 H/ iTo sum up, based on what I have mentioned, I argue that it is essential for the young people to have the ability to plan and organize.

楼主果然是个坚定的模板派呐……叹气。不管用不用模板，都需要加强一些真正的逻辑论述啊。论述是第二个论据的问题，语言是第一个论点的问题。楼主要加油让自己的文章变得有说服力而不是像填词一样填上去就算啊……

hzd515976083UID: 2487213

272# jbc88 5.3 Some people thinkchildren should study and play, other people think children should help withhousehold chores. Which opinion do you prefer?
Nowadays, there is aheated discussion with sharply soaring volume about how to educate children.(A heated discussion … concerns about) Someindividuals hold the view that children should help with household chores.However, from my perspective, children should study and play. My reasons are asfollowing.
To begin with, it is universallyacknowledged that children's nature is enjoying the pleasure from playing. Forexample, when I was a child, I liked to play various games and sports such asvideo games, basketball and chess. Until now I sometimes recalled the happy period (periods) when we are (were)playing together, because I indeed learn (learned)a lot from playing. Every time when I played those games and sports with otherchildren, I can (“delete”) felt happinessbringing me a positive mood. Except that, I not only acquired the knowledge andexperience that how to communicate with each other, but also established a hostof friendships with those children during the time when we were playing. Now,the communication skills help me to exchange ideas with other people. Thosefriends who were (are) playing with me now aremy good friends who always assist me to overcome problems and obstacles which Iencounter. Therefore, children should play. （这一段全是讲一个例子，前面适当可以多点论述，合适的时候给出例子，切合本段的论点）
In addition, studying plays a crucial rolein one's life. If children do not study well, they will not own skills andknowledge. Once children cannot accept education, they will lose high-salaryjobs' offer in that whether children can hunt a high-salary job all is dependedon what skill he possesses (they possess) after he (they) grads. In other words, if children do notstudy well, their futures are needed to be worried. As our technology andeconomy develop rapidly, many companies demand talents who can (“delete”) possess more knowledge and skills.Therefore, studying will become more and more vital for anyone. There is nodoubt that children should study.
Nevertheless, children also help withhousehold chores, because household chores can let children learn how to takecare of family. But, doing household chores willrequire children time and energy. It is disadvantage for children’s growth. Ingroup to children’s better future, children should study and play rather thanhelp with household chores.
To sum up, based on what I have mentioned, Ideem that children should study and play.
楼主文章平实，语言中规中矩

amanda_qinyyUID: 2632170

5.3 修改by 暧暧

见附件。