Yuki的作文贴

longxue26UID: 2687755

8-30 综合写作 TPO12

The reading asserts that a professionallypainted full-length portrait of a teenage girl owned by a member of the Austenfamily is Jane Austen. But the professor in the lecture considers the argumentis unconvincing and the Austen is not the subject at all.

First, the reading claims that Austenfamily has supported the girl in the portrait to be Jane Austen. The speakerchallenges with opposite opinion. The family members probably had never seenAustin at all since she had died 70 years. So they couldn't judge the validityof the portrait and it's unreasonable to conclude the girl in the painting isJane Austen.

Second, though the portrait resembles theone in Cassandra’s' sketch of Austen talked in the reading; the girl might be arelative of Austen's who is similar with her.
Austen had a big family that time and there were other teenage girls init. They may resemble each other and this girl in the painting is likely to beone of the relatives.
niece那里没听清

Third, the reading points Austen familywould hire the contemporarily active painter Humphrey to portrait the youngAusten. However, the speaker casts the adverse view on this assertion. Only thestyle of this painting is linked to Ozias Huphrey, which is weak evidence tomake a conclusion. On the other hand, there was a man selling canvas used inthe painting. He didn't start to sell the canvas until Austen was 27 year-old,which means the teenage girl in the portrait is not Austen.

longxue26UID: 2687755

8-31的综合写作



09.08.07NA
Doyou agree or disagree with the following statement? Parents should allowchildren to make their own choices rather than determine their children’sfuture for them+tpo1

It’s widely argued about the role parentsare playing in the process of children development. Some insist that parentsshould allow children to make decisions on their own while some stress thenecessity of parents’ determinations on children’s future. As far as I amconcerned, I agree with the former suggestion, why not let children decidetheir future by themselves?

Many children have their own dream and wantto fulfill it in the way designed themselves. However, adults may take it astoo imaginative to approve and oppose the action or even order children tofollow what they decide to do. When children cannot receive any support fromparents, they probably turn to dangerous trials for help. My sister has beendreaming to be a painter and she draws excellently. But her parents refused toafford her to learn painting thinking her idea is naive. In the end my sisterstole money from her parents and left home to study in another city for a longtime. In this case, no matter if she has now become a painter or not, the mostimportant thing is that parents should respect and value children’s opinionseriously. No matter what children’s decision is achievable or not, too muchinterposal leads to no more than a harmful consequence at last.


Some parents have been accustomed to spoilchildren and prevent any potential uneasiness; they always actively make decisionsfor children. Nevertheless, not only the children’s dependent character will becultivated, but also the future development will be hindered. This often happenswhen students apply for colleges. Among different selections, some parentsinsist the colleges in the hometown, at least those not far away from them. Regardlessof the educational quality, they consider convenience of looking after thechildren as prerequisite. With lacking of opportunities of basic life practice,some college students are even unable to wash clothes and clean houses. As aresult, the blind love merely means hazard and threat for children in thefuture.

In addition, though children are knowledgeableand independent enough to determine the future on their own, some parents tendto cast doubts and express little trust. Without encouragement and belief fromfamily members, they’re more likely to be frustrated or defeated in front ofdifficulties and toils. Moreover, he/she may give up hopes to continue tryingnew things and overcoming challenges in future. So if children have madedecisions by themselves, parents should avoid discouraging them and offer helpand proper instruction, especially confronting adverse circumstances.

In sum, taking into account cultivation ofindependence and fighting spirit upon children, it’s better for parents to patchildren’s shoulder and let them grow up in their own world.




话说我写这个作文的时候 都要疯了...

ke_heatherUID: 2681472

加油哦··  
改28号的。。。

静和UID: 2371073

Yuki MM不好意思耽搁了。。已经改好了，请过目吧

longxue26UID: 2687755

184# 静和

静和 你的帖子链接在哪儿啊

longxue26UID: 2687755

8-31 综合写作

While the reading talks about negativeimpacts on fossils resulted from private ownership and merchant activities, thespeaker in the lecture disagree with this and thinks it too exaggerated.

First, though private collectors own manyfossils, it doesn’t not mean any less exposure to the public. Since the merchandiseof fossils become routine and common, even public schools and libraries can buya lot of fossils easily and display them to the public. So more people can seethe fossils, to the contrary with the reading.

Second, the reading claims scientists loseaccess to important fossils and miss out discoveries because of wealthy fossilbuyers. On the opposite, the lecture argues that all the fossils needscientific identify before purchase. That is, big amount of fossils will bepassed to scientists first. Therefore, more fossils are accessible forscientists to observe and get information from.

Third, the reading asserts commercialcollectors often destroy valuable scientific evidence associated with fossils;however, this point is challenged by the speaker. In fact, there’re huge amountof fossils are undiscovered by scientific groups or universities. It’s certainlygood news for all the people to find more fossils by private collectors. Thoughthere may be some incautious work during discovery, but it is far better thanleave most fossils under ground.

dukenuneeUID: 2859326

水平有限，个人意见，莫怪莫怪。

FannieHsuUID: 2861996

8-30 综合写作 TPO12

The reading asserts that a professionallypainted full-length portrait of a teenage girl owned by a member of the Austenfamily is Jane Austen. But the professor in the lecture considers the argument is unconvincing and the Austen is not the subject at all.

First, the reading claims that Austenfamily has supported the girl in the portrait to be Jane Austen. The speakerchallenges with opposite opinion. The family members probably had never seenAustin at all since she had died 70 years. So they couldn't judge the validityof the portrait and it's unreasonable to conclude the girl in the painting isJane Austen.

Second, though the portrait resembles theone in Cassandra’s' sketch of Austen talked in the reading; the girl might be arelative of Austen's who is similar with her.
* n+ t3 C1 L1 a" HAusten had a big family that time and there were other teenage girls init. They may resemble each other and this girl in the painting is likely to beone of the relatives.

the reading points Austen familywould hire the contemporarily active painter Humphrey to portrait the youngAusten. However, the speaker casts the adverse view on this assertion. Only thestyle of this painting is linked to Ozias Huphrey, which is weak evidence tomake a conclusion. On the other hand, there was a man selling canvas used inthe painting. He didn't start to sell the canvas until Austen was 27 year-old,which means the teenage girl in the portrait is not Austen.

挑不出毛病，理由挺到位的，语法也没有问题。。比我写的好，呵呵

longxue26UID: 2687755

9-1 独立写作练习

Governments should pay more attention to health-care issues thanenvironmental issues.


There’re two hot topics attractingextensive concerns, one is the health-care and the other is the environment. Health-caremaintains an important position in the discussion on human development and somepeople suggest governments should pay more attention to it, compared with environmentalissues. In my opinion, however, I don’t agree with it.

Admittedly, everyone cares about his/herhealth condition and no one is able to live a good life without healthy body. Butthis doesn’t mean environmental problems should be overweighed by governments,to the contrary, they need more attention. Obviously, our life is now sufferingthe most serious threat resulted from a variety of pollution. In India, most ofcitizens can not drink clean water since their mother river is badly polluted. Eachyear, thousands of children die from water infection there. No matter how muchinvested into medical equipments and pharmacy, the situation will not betotally dissolved without any actions exerted into environment. So a simpleclaim for health-care is weak and vain.

Some people may think human beings areeasily to gain longevity nowadays because of well equipped health-care system. Nevertheless,they tend to ignore the most powerful disasters caused by environmental issues,such as earthquake, flood and mud flow. Everything will be ruined thoroughlywhen these nightmarish disasters attack. We need governments to construct warningsystem and all the helps with avoiding potential risks. No matter how super thehealth-care system is, lack in strong dams, stable buildings, timelyinformation and proper arrangement, life will be as fragile as the salinebottle, ironically.

It’s understandable that we should payattention to the health problems, but too much focus or to say the selfishnessof human being blocks people’s eyes to reach a far-sighted view. We blindlyeager to lengthen our life, but refuse to devote barely more to love the environment.Though loud noises are made for protecting environment, rare effective fruitare harvested. Facing the innumerous consequences generated from environmental destruction,how can we only care about ourselves shamelessly? If governments cast no morefurther concerns on environmental issues, the most life-threatening disease isthe selfish and blindness of ourselves.

In sum, we shouldn’t pay most of ourconcerns to the health-care issues. Environmental problems are equally significantand even require people’s more notice and care. So I completely disagree withthe argument.

lanzhi_gjyUID: 2717147

不好意思，快要考试了，刚开学事也比较多，改晚了 ~

longxue26UID: 2687755

9-1 综合写作 TPO14

In order to deal with aftermath ofdisasters like forest fires and severe storms, the reading suggests the way ofsalvage logging. However, the speaker in the lecture doesn’t agree with thepoints discussed by the author.

First, admittedly, salvage logging can helpremove dead trees and makes room for new growth, but to the contrary, naturaldecayed environment is much better than the manual cleaning. In fact, it’s moresuitable for trees to thrive during this natural process and the soil will belack in necessary nutrition for trees after salvage logging.

Second, the reading points that insects candamage trees and salvage logging helps solve this problem. But the speaker challengesthis theory immediately. Insects’ habitats have been appearing for one hundredyears and no harmful evidence has been found. In addition, there’re many birdsuse the trees as habitats too, so the ecosystem benefits the environment in along run. If the salvage logging is exerted, it’ll serve nothing but damage theforest.

Finally, the writer asserts salvage loggingprovides economical benefits and more job opportunities for local residents. Thisargument is also attacked by the speaker. In the cases of serious disasters, peoplehave to use helicopter and other expensive transportations to tackle with. So thebenefit will last short and remain little. Moreover, all the jobs will betemporary during the salvage logging and more experienced outsiders will belargely hired rather than local residents who need training and practice.

dreamdptUID: 2872879

09.08.07NA
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Parents should allow children to make their own choices rather than determine their children’s future for them+tpo1

It’s widely argued about the role parents are playing in the process of children development. Some insist that parents should allow children to make decisions on their own while some stress the necessity of parents’ determinations on children’s future. As far as I am concerned, I agree with the former suggestion, why not let children decide their future by themselves?

Many children have their own dream and want to fulfill it in the way designed themselves. However, adults may take it as too imaginative to approve of and oppose the action or even order children to follow what they decide to do(这句话什么意思呀). When children cannot receive any support from parents, they probably turn to dangerous trials for help. My sister has been dreaming to be a painter and she draws excellently. But her parents refused to afford her to learn painting thinking her idea is naive. In the end my sister stole money from her parents and left home to study in another city for a long time. In this case, no matter if she has now become a painter or not, the most important thing is that parents should respect and value children’s opinion seriously. No matter what(whether) children’s decision is achievable or not, too much interposal leads to no more than a harmful consequence at last.


Some parents have been accustomed to spoil children and prevent any potential uneasiness; they always actively make decisions for children. Nevertheless, not only the children’s dependent character will be cultivated, but also the future development will be hindered. This often happens when students apply for colleges. Among different selections, some parents insist the colleges in the hometown, at least those not far away from them. Regardless of the educational quality, they consider the convenience of looking after the children as the prerequisite. With lacking(the lack) of opportunities of basic life practice, some college students are even unable to wash clothes and clean houses. As a result, the blind love merely means a hazard and threat for(to) children in the future.

In addition, though children are knowledgeable and independent enough to determine the future on their own, some parents tend to cast doubts and express little trust. Without encouragement and belief from family members, they’re more likely to be frustrated or defeated in front of difficulties and toils. Moreover, he/she may give up hopes to continue trying new things and overcoming challenges in future. So if children have made decisions by themselves, parents should avoid discouraging them and offer help and proper instruction, especially when confronting adverse circumstances.

In sum, taking into account cultivation of independence and fighting spirit upon children, it’s better for parents to pat children’s shoulder and let them grow up in their own world.

楼主好强啊，值得学习。我才刚开始写，应该多加油了。
打阴影的部分是我觉得一些可以学习的地方（其实有好多没标出来）
红字是我觉得要改的地方，若改得不对还请多多包涵。

louisa427UID: 2458920

已改

白菜学英语UID: 2731720

你提得意见很有用~谢谢啦
修改好啦 9-1-health-care.doc (28 KB, 下载次数: 1)

2010-9-2 10:29:40 上传

下载次数: 1

yozujUID: 2736441

综合 改好了