本帖最后由 海王泪 于 2010-1-13 09:17 编辑
关于[Comment][01.12]Unjust Laws 的AW思考
草稿。草稿。。记录对于今天的ECO分析～
原文请见12日的ECO作业
【America's Unjust Sex Law】
https://bbs.gter.net/viewthread.php?tid=1050520 
I strongly recommend this article for the following reasons:
1.Materials for Issue Task such as Issue17 and 174
2.Analitical Proccess of critiques on a policy, which could be used similar in Argument Task
坦白说，如果说这篇文章在ISSUE部分获益的仅局限于一点点的素材和两个切入点（立法、话语权），对ARGUMENT部分而言能学到得则包括了一套Critical Thinking的思路、角度和语言。可能我有点夸张，但此文的确让我意犹未尽，遂和大家分享并希望大家指正我想法的不足之处以及思路问题所在～
Argument部分
咳咳～废话不多说了，直接上材料，上解释。
因为作者并不是在写GRE作文的ARGUMENT，所以没拿Megan’s Law开刷，毕竟去否认法律初衷绝对是一件很愚蠢的事，但也引出一个值得回避的问题。即不可以一上来就一棒子打死ARGU的材料，我们要明白，不是所有ARGU中的建议都居心叵测，也许它们的动机是好的，只是实施方法、针对对象出了点问题。
此文没拿Megan’s Law开刷，意味着这篇文章没有“他因”这种攻击方式。
不过，我们可以借鉴得是，质疑材料中的原建议，通过以下几个角度：“针对对象”、“恶劣后果”，“有效性”；最后针对性地提出相应的“改进意见”
（也许用词不当，但请原谅，皆因菜鸟一名思路未成体系，意会意会～）
ARGU第一意群（针对对象）
How dangerous are the people on the registries? A state review of one sample in Georgia found that two-thirds of them posed little risk. For example, Janet Allison was found guilty of being “party to the crime of child molestation” because she let her 15-year-old daughter have sex with a boyfriend. The young couple later married. But Ms Allison will spend the rest of her life publicly branded as a sex offender.
【典型Argument模式】质疑法律有效性、适用对象：
（理由）大多数限制对象不具威胁—》（反例）Janet Allison杯具了～
另外：这里有一个[隐含Claim]，即对象弄错了，为后文提改进意见铺路。
First, it is unfair to impose harsh penalties for small offences. Perhaps a third of American teenagers have sex before they are legally allowed to, and a staggering number have shared revealing photographs with each other. This is unwise, but hardly a reason for the law to ruin their lives.
【典型 Argument模式】质疑法律适用对象： （理由）小错难免，可以理解—》（反面论证）恶劣后果，毁了一生
ARGU第二意群（恶劣后果）
Second, America’s sex laws often punish not only the offender, but also his family. If a man who once slept with his 15-year-old girlfriend is barred for ever from taking his own children to a playground, those children suffer.
【短小精悍的ARGU段】质疑法律的恶劣后果：
（理由）波及家庭, 诛连九族—》（反例）一个父亲的杯具～
ARGU第三意群（有效性）
Third, harsh laws often do little to protect the innocent. The police complain that having so many petty sex offenders on registriesmakes it hard to keep track of the truly dangerous ones. Cash that might be spent on treating sex offenders—which sometimes works—is spent on huge indiscriminate registries. Public registers drive serious offenders underground, which makes them harder to track and more likely to reoffend. And registers give parents a false sense of security: most sex offenders are never even reported, let alone convicted.
【典型Argument模式】质疑法律有效性：
对保护受害人没有起到实质性帮助，情况甚至变得更糟—》
（理由1）Truly Dangerous有了掩护，因为小打小闹的信息过多；
（理由2）Cash，警察经费的机会成本；
（理由3）A false sense of security，家长有安全错觉，真正的罪犯不在法律监管之下（P.S.无论是潜在的还是现有的）.
评论：这段Critique非常强悍～直接否定现行法律执行，因为有违初衷，没有效果，甚至是比原来的情况更糟糕了！！（这种ARGU的感觉，是不是很熟悉？）
特别是理由3 A false sense of security是不是有点似曾相识？
没错～【6分ARGU的官方范文】关于溜冰鞋安全设备也用到类似的思路～
原话：“ After all, a false confidence in ineffective gear could be just as dangerous as no gear at all.”
ARGU第四意群（改进建议）
1) It would not be hard to redesign America’s sex laws.
2) Instead of lumping all sex offenders together on the same list for life, states should assess each person individually and include only real threats.
3) Instead of posting everything on the internet, names could be held by the police, who would share them only with those, such as a school, who need to know.
4) Laws that bar sex offenders from living in so many places should be repealed, because there is no evidence that they protect anyone: a predator can always travel.
5) The money that a repeal saves could help pay for monitoring compulsive molesters more intrusively—through ankle bracelets and the like.
【典型ARGU提改进建议】
第一句：其实也可以按着（立法者、ARGU材料作者）原意图，不过稍微Redesign一下
第二句：Instead of….. states should assess…..呼应第一意群，对象要划分
第三句：Instead of….. names could be held….细节化第二句(details)，再具体的建议
第四句：Bar should be….呼应第二意群，撤销恶劣后果；另外，because there is no evidence that….进一步攻击原措施有效性，充当撤销的理由。
第五局：Saves could help…呼应第三意群，省省钱也好～顺便巩固第三意群中第二个理由。
上诉四个意群中的思路、角度和语言，通过“针对对象”、“恶劣后果”，“有效性”对法律提出质疑，然后再针对性地提出相应的“改进意见”，从理论上来说是可以借鉴到ARGUMENT中的～
Issue部分
17"There are two types of laws: just and unjust. Every individual in a society has a responsibility to obey just laws and, even more importantly, to disobey and resist unjust laws."
阅读下述材料，发现Unjust Law的一个促成因素是立法者的懦弱～Sigh～Political Cowardice，民主机制的缺失（民主机制的缺陷才对，in other words, 多数人的暴政。谢谢Pluka指出问题！^_^）。
Individual American politicians have great latitude to propose new laws. Stricter curbs on paedophiles win votes. And to sound severe, such curbs must be stronger than the laws in place, which in turn were proposed by politicians who wished to appear tough themselves. Few politicians dare to vote against such laws, because if they do, the attack ads practically write themselves.
其实当政客也不容易～要想在政界混下去就得遵循物竞天择，也应验了Hugesea那天发的Political Crime：
Politics have become discredited by the employment of culpable expedients and the adoption of immoral maxims; for their reputation to be retrieved they must be brought into accord with morality.
提出Unjust Law的一种成因后，问题的关键即是否应该抵制Unjust Law。在此引用comorain前辈的一段分析
There are two types of laws: just and unjust. Every individual in a society has a responsibility to obey just laws and, even more importantly, to disobey and resist unjust laws."
1、定义：What are unjust laws? Where are they from?
Martin Luther King, Jr.: An unjust law is a code that is out of harmony with the moral law. One has a moral responsibility to disobey unjust laws. An individual who breaks a law that conscience tells him is unjust, and who willingly accepts the penalty of imprisonment in order to arouse the conscience of the community over its injustice, is in reality expressing the highest respect for law.
“unjust laws”这一概念最早出自St. Augustine：An unjust law is no law at all. 马丁·路德·金在《从伯明翰市监狱发出的信 Letter from Birmingham City Jail》将其发扬光大，并给出了自己的判断标准。他认为，抵制不公正的法律，并自愿接受监禁的惩罚，以唤起民众对不公正的良心，本质上是在向法律表达最崇高的敬意。
对于Sex Offender而言，总不能不服刑甚至是报复性地对待Unfair Law吧？
但是，如果坚信自己是Innocent的，就不能忍气吞声！他们要用话语权来抵制这种不公正的法律～用自己的悲惨经历去唤起民众们对法律不完善、不公正的良心～来让Politician为自己赢取选票。
对于非Sex Offender的有识之士，则可以通过媒体舆论来帮助抵制Unfair Law。
“However practical and just the case for reform, it must overcome political cowardice, the tabloid media and parents’ understandable fears.”
客服重重困难，当然不是说要一面倒地批评政治懦弱、愚昧媒体和家长的过度恐慌，而是应懂得使用话语权、懂得如何有效地Lead政治家、媒体和家长。
下面这些例子就很成功地博得了我的同情，相信考官也会有同感～^_^
这恰恰证明作者Resist的行为是有效的，他是有能力协助抵抗Unjust Law的！即唤起公民对不公正的良心，本质上是在向法律表达最崇高的敬意！
【文中例子】
一个可怜的父亲，陪自己孩子上公园的权利都没了～
America’s sex laws often punish not only the offender, but also his family. If a man who once slept with his 15-year-old girlfriend is barred for ever from taking his own children to a playground, those children suffer. 一些可怜的青少年，传传艳照，烙上Sex Offender的印记，毁了一生
Perhaps a third of American teenagers have sex before they are legally allowed to, and a staggering number have shared revealing photographs with each other. This is unwise, but hardly a reason for the law to ruin their lives. 一位可怜的女士，允许女儿和他男朋友××，她们后来结婚，自己却变Sex Offender
For example, Janet Allison was found guilty of being “party to the crime of child molestation” because she let her 15-year-old daughter have sex with a boyfriend. The young couple later married. But Ms Allison will spend the rest of her life publicly branded as a sex offender. 又是一位可怜的女生，帮一男生×少儿不宜×，结果因为男生比她小一岁被告鸡奸，五年缓刑，然后被公布，面对生活环境邻居的窃窃私语，经常被解雇，丈夫陪着受舆论压力
Unjust and ineffective(另一篇相关报道)
[url=http://www.ecocn.org/bbs/redirect.php?tid=22226&goto=lastpost
上述几个例子，可以应用到下面的Issue题
174"Laws should not be rigid or fixed. Instead, they should be flexible enough to take account of various circumstances, times, and places."
法律不应该一概而论，不同的对象因有条件得区分~Discriminate
对此作者还提出的建议：
It would not be hard to redesign America’s sex laws. Instead of lumping all sex offenders together on the same list for life, states should assess each person individually and include only real threats. Instead of posting everything on the internet, names could be held by the police, who would share them only with those, such as a school, who need to know.
回到17题，我们发现，不仅仅是要唤起公民的良心，还要提出切实可行的方案来供法制社会选择，这就更深一层得反对了Unjust Law。
ISSUE部分胡乱写过来也没深究，只是个Idea记录，日后慢慢想。。今日高谈阔论，切莫见怪。。。
P.S.今天的是草稿～^_^～很乱～莫介意。。希望大家指正我想法的不足之处以及思路问题所在
在这个惜时如命的期末，我居然头脑发热～哭丧～马上复习，保GPA。。 | 
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楼主: 海王泪
发表于 2010-1-5 23:44:05
发表于 2010-1-7 00:22:53
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