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本帖最后由 bzr2915 于 2010-3-2 18:13 编辑
NO.131 艺术
"The arts (painting, music, literature, etc.) reveal the otherwise hidden ideas and impulses of a society."
艺术(绘画、音乐、文学等)展现了那些如果没有艺术,是被隐藏的观点和社会的脉动。
1.Why a society or people may hide some ideas and impulses:
(a) 从主观上说,人类的想象力太丰富,现有的知识和经验跟不上, 感情太丰富,不能准确的表达
(b) 从客观上说,很多时候受某些事情的限制没有办法表达真实的感情,或者人们的呼声太弱,不能引起大家的注意
2.So call for the emergency of arts(由此对艺术的需求,这个point不太切题,原题中并没有这层关系,此题为事实类题目,重点讨论艺术展现XXX这一事实到底是否成立,而不是讨论因为XXXX所以CALL FOR 艺术,1、3均没问题)
3.How could arts reveal these otherwise hidden ideas?
(a) 对于那些主观上没有办法表达的,艺术创造了一些其他的形式也帮助人们表达
(b) 对于那些客观问题不能表达的,艺术可以很隐晦的表达,或者放大那些被缩小的思想
不要着急,8天还很长,找准原因,密集练习,如果限时不行,就狂限时写,直到写出来为止,不要回避困难,现在能做的只有多练习,再多练习狂练习!
以下修改仅代表个人意见,请批判性接受~
As the limitation of human knowledge and experiences, many ideas and impulses are hidden, or even disappeared in the history, and obviously, it is the pity for our human beings, so something else(这里看不到有ELSE) to reveal these hidden ideas and impulses of society is eager to be needed(这个表达不太好用不着被动,is urgent need).
第一段写完了需要某种东西来揭示XX,感觉下面一段写这种能揭示XX的东西可能对味一点,另外我觉得这个开头引领的不太好,更像一个过渡段。
It is well known that the civilization of human beings was not so advanced at the beginning. From people using tools to the occurrence of the language, the society has gradually developed. That is to say, people are slowly building up the knowledge and experiences. Therefore there are many limitations for us to reveal our social ideas and impulses(这里有偏差原题中说的是 hidden ideas and impulses of a society,你在这里偷换概念变成了人的社会观念和动力)not only from the subjective but also form the objective. (前面的因果关系不太充分,不一定是由于知识经验的不足(也可能是人们的一些观念,道德约束)才导致了社会的一些隐藏XX未被发现)When thinking subjectively, the imagination of human beings is always so rich and sometimes so abstract that the development of our knowledge and experiences cannot catch up with it. In addition, people are the most emotional animal. The simple words, such as laugh, cry, sad, etc. are not enough to satisfy the needs of communicating with each other effectively. All these two situations call for something can reveal what we are thinking about but have no ability to do this(去掉,加他容易让人以为替代THINK ABOUT了,额,也可能我理解错了..). On the other hand, from the objective view, there are many other difficulties, which make our individual or society thoughts undersurface. Not only for that our society is not democratic enough to have citizens expressed some real thoughts. But only for that even some times, we express our thoughts, the power of influence is too small, which cannot take others or society's attention. (这里还是放在了人的想法而没落脚到社会的IDEAS)At this time, we need to get help from some special method to show them to society.
感觉写的挺隐晦的,不如直接把艺术拿出来说,一直用something给我的感觉是有点HESITATE
Based on these reasons discussed above, people eager to find out something else to tell others what we are thinking, what the impulses of society are. Thereafter people make the arts came out to complete these functions. And the arts indeed did and are doing and even will do it.
和第一段有点像了,个人建议一开始就把ART点出来,速度切入主题,重点讨论ART到底揭没揭示XXX
According to ?how could the arts do this, also we can from the view of subjective and objective. Firstly, as for those imaginations or emotions, which normal people cannot express well, the arts create other forms to finish it. Take the delusions as an example, some people suffer from these psychological disease. But unfortunately they cannot share this painfulness with others; because they cannot say it exactly what is it with poor words. And even they tell them out, it stands for nothing, because others, who have not such experience, cannot understand them. For the time being, the arts make it cone true. A typical work is the film "A Beautiful Mind", in which a genius mathematician suffers from it and it lasts all his life. I think this film just speaks to the hearts of people who suffers from it, make other people trust such kind of things happen in the world, or even catch the attention of psychologist to research it. What’s more, as the development of technology, many people like to imaginative what will be in the later 100 years, what are the outer space looks like, or is there any other life in the space. Too much such kind of thoughts hovers in our minds but cannot release out. Artists do us a favor. They create many great works to illustrate these imaginations. "Avatar" shows our guess of lives in other planet; "WALL-E", a story about a garbage-collection robot searching for life, tells people's future assumption and fears of today's pollution. And similar works are too numerous to mention, which show us a rich inner world of our human beings.
Secondly, regarding the objective reasons, the arts play a large role. For one thing, there are many times people cannot tell the truth. The arts have the function to express facts or thoughts more vague, which will not be easily felt, and the person involved will be less implicated. For example, in 19th century, black slaves, who were the bottom of the society, have no rights to gush their dissatisfaction. But "Uncle Tom’s cabin" by Stowe illustrates their lives and impacts the entirely American history a lot. For another, there are many other times that although people tell their thoughts but limited by their own infamous, their thoughts cannot draw attention of others. And at this time, the artists can add the ideas into their creations by exaggeration and symbolic means. When people are attracted by the creations, they can get the ideas at the same time. This is the arts’ magic, and other methods cannot do it.
FIRSTLY SECONDLY 去掉,直接主客观,这两端还是对hidden ideas and impulses of a society理解有偏差,不过就‘人的想法’而言分析的不错
虽然你用的句子结构简单,但能表达出来你想的东西,这点已经很不错了。 多总结一些固定句型和结构,适当的背一下用在文章里。提纲列详细+脑子里有写作框架+基本表达=不愁说不出话,完不成作文。
In sum, as illustrated above, the arts indeed reveal the otherwise hidden ideas and impulses of a society. |
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