【作文本】estop

estopUID：2864494

写的时候各种悲剧，都想吐了o(╯□╰)o


8-19 独立写作
Do you agree or disagreewith the following statement:
Telephone has greater influence on people’s livesthan TV.





Which one of new technologies has greatestinfluence in people’s lives? Are there some standards to comfirm? Everyone hasown thought, but in my views, the depth and breadth of influences of newtechnologies should be considerable. Well, taking the telephone and TV intoconsider, TV is more influential to some extent.

No one could deny that telephone is of great impactin some areas. Using telephone can chat with others no matter where you are.Besides, through the new technology, more and more intelligent platforms offerthousands of applications. For instance, the symbian system can support youwith a reader tool which can be used to look up the texts, graphs and so forth.

While the telephone has impact, TV, a massmedia, has influence not only on our daily lives, but also on people’s cognitions.It gets lots of people to attend some activities rarely before. For example,the news about the latest disaster provides the situation in this regionexactly. More people would like to donate money and daily necessities to helpthe restruction.

The hot spot issues in TV programs become theusual topics at their leisure time. Nowadays, seldom do people only concentrateon their works; most participate and put their felicity in talking aboutcurrent events. With the higher living standard, the requirement to better cognitiveis serious for both themselves and the society. In some cases, the design ofnew productions with higher cognitions is more popular for taking consider to customers’demand effectively. There is no doubt that discussion about current affairs isgood for improve the cognitive level.

For the reasons above I therefore believethat TV has greater influence than telephone. Although the telephone is alsoimportant in some respects, TV, facing the demand of this era, is more infusive.


字数刚够，写不出来了。

estopUID：2864494

8-19 综合写作

TPO 3
The lecture and reading passage give contradictory opinions about the whether the painting, Portrait of an Elderly Woman in a White Bonnet, was made by Rembrandt.
First, the reading holds that the painting is inconsistent for the fur collar is not suitable to servants. The professor, however, states that there is no fur collar in the original painting, and it was added to this painting about one hundred years after it was finished.
Moreover, the professor contents that light-color clothes could illuminate the woman’s face. So the light and shadow in this portrait fit on each other realistically and accurately. It challenges reading passage that the elements in this painting do not fit together.
Finally, although the passage suggests it was painted on a wood panel glued together, the professor argues that the portrait was later enlarged to become more grand and valuable. Besides, there are some other painting of Rembrandt are used this kind of wood.
In conclusion, this painting, partly unusual, is attributed to Rembrandt.

jjooyyUID：2704028

1# estop

Which one of new technologies has greatestinfluence in people’s lives? Are there some standards to comfirm? Everyone has own thought, but in my views, the depth and breadth of influences of new technologies should(why should?) be considerable. Well语气词不用写，也不应该写, taking the telephone and TV intoconsider, TV is more influential to some extent.  h0 y6 v) y. [$ D& R2 R
; b* \$ v, b1 d& |" X  ^0 m; ?
No one could deny that telephone is of great impact in some areas. Using telephone can chat with others no matter where you are.Besides, through the new technology, more and more intelligent platforms offer thousands of applications.呃讲的不够清楚 手机平台吧，在platforms应该加上注解，不然出来的很突然 For instance, the symbian专有名字首字母大学 system can support you with a reader tool不精确，可以写阅读PDF which can be used to look up the texts, graphs and so forth.


While the telephone has impact, TV, a mass media, has influenced not only on our daily lives, but also on people’s cognitions. It gets lots of people to attend some activities rarely before.(??什么意思？) For example,the news about the latest disaster provides the situation in this（the） region exactly. Consequently，More people would like to donate money and daily necessities to help the restruction.2 Y% k* ^+ P: N8 B

The hot spot（chiglish 吧） issues in TV programs become the usual topics at their leisure time. Nowadays, seldom do people only concentrate on their works; most participate和后面的搭配不好吧 and put their felicity in talking about current events. With the higher living standard, the requirement to better cognitiveis serious for both themselves and the society.（？？不懂） In some cases, the design of new productions with higher cognitions is more popular for taking consider to customers’demand(taking customers’demand into consideration) effectively. There is no doubt that discussion about current affairs is good for improve the cognitive level.怀疑 这是在讲电视吗! p! l( H# `% _* s$ l  G

the reasons above I therefore believe that TV has greater influence than telephone. Although the telephone is also important in some respects, TV, facing the demand of this era, is more infusive.

好多蓝色的，楼主需要更多更详细的注解你的句子，比如连词什么的，太突然了看不懂文章，记得：coherently~
加油！！

estopUID：2864494

独立：Doyou agree or disagree with the following statement:　　

Advertising is the most important cause of unhealthy eating habits.　　(Media)

The consciousness to unhealthy eating habits is very common to people, however, whymost of them seem that they have no desire and are not willing to take action tocorrect these wrong habits. Are the unhealthy eating habits almost resultedfrom the advertising? In some cases, the advertising plays an important role informing the unhealthy habits, but not most.

Nobody could deny that some advertisements can mislead some consumers from the inexactexplanations and expressions. The basic ways of advertising to mislead peopleare exaggeration, celebrities and so forth. Even so, it is not difficult foradults to indentify. If the adults are influenced by most ads, it is a disasterbeyond imagination. For example, if someone is will to improve his physicalcondition, thus buys a machine, publicizing from the ads. To lose weight, hewill full of disappointment if he only relies on the machine without eitherexercise or diet control. Some researches show that almost all analogousmachines make no effects to lose weight and eventually people are addicted tothe imagination of a fitter, stronger body. As it mentioned above, people may cannothelp asking which factor do the most?

It is a complex question, the unhealthy diet results from the combination of somefactors as far as we could consider. The unhealthy diet has become one of the mostserious problems and should be thought deeply.In my opinion, it comes from people’s inertia. An increasing number of people tend to eatjunk food and choose fried food for its convenient and delicious. The tiresomeof the process of cook is the obstacle for people to make food by themselves. Unavoidableof food from being used more oils gets people ignore its risk, when eatingoutside. The reason, advertising influences, is only to dissemble their lazy- itmay be misconceived, not incomprehension.

What puzzles me a lot is why the elders have never formed unhealthy eating habits? Relativelybackward for the society leads that it is not as easy as today to eat snack. But developments make a different sort ofgesture: not so much better diet condition; more a society offers moreattractions to people and makes more barriers for people to possess healthyeating habits. According to a statistics, it takes about triple or more time ontheir ways to work, because of the serious and even intensifying traffic problems.It stands to reason that less leisure time and more pressure have negative impacton people’s habits, including the diet habits.

Why the fuss about the unhealthy habits now? Indeed, the requirement of thinkingover bad habits is essential in the past. Aren’t people going to continue torely on the advertisement used as an excuse to deceive themselves as well asothers, but not to face the problems?

serena-blueUID：2811284

综合写作修改：
The lecture and reading passage give contradictory opinions about the（删除the) whether the painting, Portrait of an Elderly Woman in a White Bonnet, was made by Rembrandt.2 v0 j* K& G; U% x2 ~7 y6 k1 A8 r

First, the reading holds that the painting is inconsistent for the fur collar is not suitable to servants. The professor, however, states that there is no fur collar in the original painting, and it was added to this painting about one hundred years after it was finished.2 i* o. r! K4 \) }

Moreover, the professor contents that light-color clothes could illuminate the woman’s face. So the light and shadow in this portrait fit on each other realistically and accurately. It challenges reading passage that the elements in this painting do not fit together.
第二段需要解释的详细点

Finally, although the passage suggests it was painted on a wood panel glued together, the professor argues that the portrait was later enlarged to become more grand and valuable. Besides, there are some other painting of Rembrandt are used this kind of wood
.
In conclusion, this painting, partly unusual, is attributed to Rembrandt.
虽然每个点都听出来了，但是欠缺一点细节。

jjooyyUID：2704028

4# estop

Advertising is the most important cause of unhealthy eating habits.　　(Media)
$ I; y! q+ E- \+ r8 U. X$ X  F0 i- T3 b  p1 v# f$ S. j
The consciousness to unhealthy eating habits is very common to people, however, why most of them seem that they have no desire and are not willing to take action to correct these wrong habits.(?) Are the unhealthy eating habits almost resulted from the advertising? In some cases, the advertising plays an important role informing the unhealthy habits, but not most.
( b0 L* Y+ l* Q
, B0 X$ {0 R- z8 s! V
Nobody could deny that some advertisements can mislead some consumers from the inexact explanations and expressions. The basic ways of advertising to mislead peopleare exaggeration, celebrities and so forth. Even so, it is not difficult for adults to indentify. If the adults are influenced by most ads, it is a disaster有点重了吧 beyond imagination. For example, if someone is will to improve his physicalcondition, thus buys a machine, publicizing（publicized） from the ads. To lose weight, hewill full of disappointment if he only relies on the machine without either exercise or diet control. Some researches show that almost all analogous machines(?) make no effects to lose weight and eventually people are addicted tothe imagination of a fitter, stronger body. As it mentioned above, people may cannothelp asking which factor do the most?突然冒出这个来？
4 b  N( X% h) \( U! }& d) `3 K* Q6 ^. V6 D; W4 L
It is a complex question, the unhealthy diet results from the combination of some factors as far as we could consider. The unhealthy diet has become one of the mostserious problems and should be thought deeply.In my opinion, it comes from people’s inertia. An increasing number of people tend to eat junk food and choose fried food for its convenient and delicious. The tiresome of the process of cook is the obstacle for people to make food by themselves. Unavoidableof food from being used more oils gets people ignore its risk, when eatingoutside. The reason, advertising influences这句话不清不楚的, is only to dissemble their lazy- itmay be misconceived, not incomprehension.

4 @4 V, Y6 Y) Y# o' s  H5 S9 \What puzzles me a lot is why the elders have never formed unhealthy eating habits? Relativelybackward for the society leads that it is not as easy as today to eat snack. But developments make a different sort ofgesture(？): not so much better diet condition; more a society offers more attractions to people and makes more barriers for people to possess healthyeating habits. According to a statistics, it takes about triple or more time ontheir ways to work, because of the serious and even intensifying traffic problems. It stands to reason that less leisure time and more pressure have negative impact on people’s habits, including the diet habits.这段有点乱啊 我看的有点晕晕乎乎的
& W' j+ h2 C0 {. Z9 Y; D! g& m: I6 O* d; T1 ]' u1 j9 u7 j! q
Why the fuss about the unhealthy habits now? Indeed, the requirement of thinkingover bad habits is essential in the past. Aren’t people going to continue torely on the advertisement used as an excuse to deceive themselves as well asothers, but not to face the problems?

建议放word 检查语法，我改的很郁闷。。。连空格都没有放好
结构有点乱 你改改吧 我晕了

louisa427UID：2458920

The consciousness to unhealthy eating habits is very common to people, however, why most of them seem that they have no desire and are not willing to take action to correct these wrong habits.？ Are the unhealthy eating habits almost resulted from the去掉 advertising? In some cases, the advertising plays an important role informing the unhealthy habits, but not most.5 O8 y8 R  T& w4 t1 c9 x

Nobody could deny that some advertisements can mislead some consumers from the inexact explanations and expressions. 这整句逻辑有点乱。The basic ways of advertising to mislead people are exaggeration, celebrities名人误导？应该是名人效应来误导。 and so forth. Even so, it is not difficult for adults to indentify. If the adults are influenced by most ads, it is a disaster这词用的太大了 beyond imagination. For example, if someone is will to improve his physical condition, thus buys a machine, publicizing from the ads. To lose weight, hewill full of disappointment if he only relies on the machine without either exercise or diet control. Some researches show that almost all analogousmachines make no effects to lose weight and eventually people are addicted tothe imagination of a fitter, stronger body. As it mentioned above, people may cannothelp asking which factor do the most?这段到最后广告与饮食的联系没有了，成了广告对强身健体的作用了，跑偏了。

It什么？应该再点一下不要怕麻烦 is a complex question, the unhealthy diet results from the combination of somefactors as far as we could consider. The unhealthy diet has become one of the most serious problems and should be thought deeply.In my opinion, it comes from people’s inertia. An increasing number of people tend to eatjunk food and choose fried food for its convenient and delicious. The tiresomeof the process of cook is the obstacle for people to usually make food by themselves. Unavoidableof food from being used more oils gets people ignore its risk, when eatingoutside. The reason, advertising influences, is only to dissemble their lazy- itmay be misconceived, not incomprehension.

What puzzles me a lot is why the elders have never formed unhealthy eating habits? Relatively backward for the society leads that it is not as easy as today to eat snack. But developments make a different sort of gesture: not so much better diet condition; more a society offers more attractions to people and makes more barriers for people to possess healthy eating habits. According to a statistics, it takes about triple or more time ontheir ways to work, because of the serious and even intensifying traffic problems.It stands to reason that less leisure time and more pressure have negative impacton people’s habits, including the diet habits.

Why the fuss about the unhealthy habits now? Indeed, the requirement of thinkingover bad habits is essential in the past. Aren’t people going to continue torely on the advertisement used as an excuse to deceive themselves as well asothers, but not to face the problems?最后一段是总结段，尽量不要用反问，这样会让人家觉得你说了整整一篇都没有解决问题还在问别人

同学你的问题在于词汇运用的不准确，有的词用的太大了，可以用最简单的词汇，但是一定要表达出主要的内容，逻辑还有一点混乱，还要再练习。

estopUID：2864494

8-21独立：Do you agree or disagree with the following statement
　　  The best way to improve education is to raise teachers’ salaries.　　(Money)
The educational level is sure to be widely cared and how to improve education is a long-term topic. In my opinion, raising teachers’ salaries, for its narrow limitation, can only do a little to the improvement of education.
To begin with, the impact from being high wages is useful way to improve education with that teacher has great influence on education. Commonly, for students, learning knowledge is directly from their teachers, whose skills and patterns play an important role on the education. The high-level salary as a motivation can get the employees do better. Teachers are not exception. If they gain more money from teaching, they will be willing to teach students attentively. For example, when all teachers in my city gave a raise to their payments, they seemed very energetic and exerted to their utmost. Besides, they do more preparations to classes at leisure time. So education improves.
Unfortunately however, to a large extent, only do salaries raised, is the advancement of education limited. The boundedness is from the dominate right of the government, not teachers. Education is a systematic process to ensure students in the schools can learn all the knowledge in the syllabus. Teacher is mere one factor in the teaching programs. Whatever teachers do, the results from education cannot take rapid variation. The major courses in the junior middle school mainly are Chinese, math and English, and the economic course has never seen in middle school in China. The narrow limitation in education gets raising salaries ineffectively.

In addition, in my view, the better way to improve education is to design the teaching pattern depends on different situations. For graduate or upper students, researches should be the main method. It is easier for them to choose their interest areas and combine the interests with their majors. In contrast, for middle school students, the teaching is better to concentrate on basic knowledge, as they have inadequate ability and knowledge to research. The education is improved if dependable patterns, a scientific way, are used.

In conclusion, the statement that raising teachers’ salaries is the best way to improve education is not convincing, for that teacher is not crucial factor in education. Additionally, dependable pattern in education is an useful way to improve.

stoptalkingUID：2807919

8-21独立：Do you agree or disagree with the following statement
　　  The best way to improve education is to raise teachers’ salaries.　　(Money)
The educational level is sure to be widely cared and how to improve education is a long-term topic. In my opinion, raising teachers’ salaries, for its narrow limitation, can only do a little to the improvement of education.

To begin with, the impact from being high wages is useful way to improve education with that teacher has great influence on education.(有点冗长…… with that，能这么用吗？) Commonly, for students, learning knowledge is directly from their teachers, whose skills and patterns play an important role on the education. The high-level salary as a motivation can get the employees do better. （这个，新东方一个老师说过，正式语体里少用get，get意思太多，会导致语义含糊）Teachers are not exception.（什么意思？） If they gain more money from teaching, they will be willing to teach students attentively. For example, when all teachers in my city gave a raise to their payments（这里应该用被动吧？）, they seemed very energetic and exerted to their utmost. Besides, they do more preparations to（make preparation for） classes at leisure time. So education improves.

Unfortunately however, to a large extent, only do salaries raised, is the advancement of education limited. (这句话没看懂) The boundedness is from the dominate right of the government, not teachers. Education is a systematic process to ensure students in the schools can learn all the knowledge in the syllabus. Teacher is mere one factor in the teaching programs. Whatever teachers do, the results from education cannot take rapid variation. The major courses in the junior middle school mainly are Chinese, math and English, and the economic course has never seen in middle school in China. The narrow limitation in education gets raising salaries ineffectively.（这段用的词比较大，超出我能力了）

In addition, in my view, the better way to improve education is to design the teaching pattern depends on different situations.（一句话出现了两个谓语） For graduate or upper students, researches should be the main method.（用doing research比较好） It is easier for them to choose their interest areas and combine the interests with their majors. In contrast, for middle school students, the teaching is better to concentrate on basic knowledge, as they have inadequate ability and knowledge to research. The education is improved if dependable patterns, a scientific way, are used.

In conclusion, the statement that raising teachers’ salaries is the best way to improve education is not convincing, for that teacher is not crucial factor in education. Additionally, dependable pattern in education is an useful way to improve.

整体结构挺好的，逻辑比较清晰，但表达上问题比较多~

estopUID：2864494

独立： 09.01.10NA

       Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Improving schools is the most important factor in the successful development of a country.
The development of a country is sure to be widely cared and which factor is the most important is a long-term topic. In my opinion, improving schools, for its narrow limitation, can only do a little for successful progress.
To begin with, improving schools plays an important role in development of a country. The graduates from schools are potential forces to improve the society with their special knowledge, brilliant ideas and well-developed qualities. Admittedly, rich experienced teachers, good studying environments, and excellent libraries are crucial factors to develop students. Additional, if teachers have some good qualities and schools have several mature ideas, the most students in these schools could possess these virtues too. Students as the future masters of the countries have severely influence on development.
Unfortunately, improving schools, however, has limited impact on the evolution. To a large extent, the development depends most on the policies of governments. The students can offer their professional skills but cannot change the social environment. For example, my brother graduated from a great university and joined a big firm with aspiration. But after only a year, he transformed to a invariable employee without the ambitions, improving the area, at all.
Consequently, the best way to advance a country is the regulation of the government. The Wealth of Nations, the first economic book, said that the society has an invisible hand to upgrade, and it could be advanced by itself. But, there are also some negative factors to block the improvement of the society and schools are useless. So it requires that the government builds up amount of policies to wipe off the bad elements and the healthy social environment will accelerate the growth.
In conclusion, the statement that improving schools can gain a successful advancement of a country is not convincing and the government is decisive to the upgrades.

estopUID：2864494

TPO6
The lecture and the reading passage give contradictory opinions on the topic of communal online encyclopedias.
Initially, the lecture states that the information in the internet is easier to be corrected, and most users, including those have special knowledge, could correct the encyclopedias. It revised that, in the reading, lacking academic credentials is common to online encyclopedias.
Subsequently, the reading concerns about the hackers who have opportunities and abilities to change the online text. But in the lecture, there are two methods to protect the information. One is the website has a read-only format that the most reader cannot alter it. Another one is that many people, having professional knowledge, monitor the online encyclopedias and could modify the information.
Finally, the reading suggests that the encyclopedias on internet could gain a false impression for their widely focuses. Oppositely, the lecture says the limitless space of network is great, so it could contain a large number of topics as far as people could without concerning the space problem at all.
In conclusion, to the communal online encyclopedias, the reading and lecture have totally different opinions.

stoptalkingUID：2807919

TPO6
The lecture and the reading passage give contradictory opinions on the topic of communal online encyclopedias.
Initially, the lecture states that the information in the internet is easier to be corrected, and most users, including those have special knowledge, could correct the encyclopedias. It revised that, in the reading, lacking academic credentials is common to online encyclopedias.——该段关键应该是error could be corrected in time and easily.
Subsequently, the reading concerns about the hackers who have opportunities and abilities to change the online text. But in the lecture, there are two methods to protect the information. One is the website has a read-only format that the most reader cannot alter it. Another one is that many people, having professional knowledge, monitor the online encyclopedias and could modify the information这段概括得挺好的
Finally, the reading suggests that the encyclopedias on internet could gain a false impression for their widely focuses. Oppositely, the lecture says the limitless space of network is great, so it could contain a large number of topics as far as people could without concerning the space problem at all 没有提到第二点，网络能体现大众的民意，而不是几个专家的意见
In conclusion, to the communal online encyclopedias, the reading and lecture have totally different opinions.

写得挺好的，用词也很丰富

longxue26UID：2687755

楼主  如果您能附上word版本的就更好了 方便批改 而且还专业 比这里

longxue26UID：2687755

11# estop

The lecture and the reading passage give contradictory opinions on the topic of communal online encyclopedias.这么说会造成误解  加上In the reading啦什么的

Initially, the lecture states that the information in the internet is easier to be corrected, and most users, including those have special knowledge, could correct the encyclopedias. It revised that, in the reading, lacking academic credentials is common to online encyclopedias.
这段主要说的是error 楼主应该说下 旧版本也会有错误而且会很久无法更改  而新版本更容易更改

Subsequently, the reading concerns about the hackers who have opportunities and abilities to change the online text. But in the lecture, there are two methods to protect the information. One is the website has a read-only format that the most reader cannot alter it. Another one is that many people, having professional knowledge, monitor the online encyclopedias and could modify the information.

Finally, the reading suggests that the encyclopedias on internet could gain a false impression for their widely focuses. Oppositely, the lecture says the limitless space of network is great, so it could contain a large number of topics as far as people could without concerning the space problem at all.
这里还有一点是 可以truely reflect the communal interest
In conclusion, to the communal online encyclopedias, the reading and lecture have totally different opinions.

很简洁 太简洁了 有点
结构什么的都很好啦

estopUID：2864494

独立：
2009.2.21　　
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement:　　
Newspapers and magazines are the best ways to learn about a foreign country. (Media)

How to understanding a foreign country is sure to be widely concerned, and which way is better is a long-term topic. In my opinion, reading newspapers and magazines, for its narrow limitation, can only do a little to learn about a foreign country.

To begin with, these mass media, newspapers and magazines, play an important role to understand other countries. Admittedly, the newspapers could offer some latest news in a country about its social events, international hotspot issues, the thought of the residents and so forth. Besides, there are lots of opinions of the residents in the magazines all over areas as far as people cared. There is no denying that people can gain enough information from these media to learn about a country.

Unfortunately however, reading has limited effects on understanding a country because the information in these media is edited by only a few people. To some extent, the contents reflect the favors of the editors. Which parts they are more interested in or better understood are more likely to depict. In this case, people cannot receive relatively objective views. If a fashion magazine represents the latest clothes in some stages, how can people learn about the country from it?

What’s more, in my view, the best way to learn the country is to visit the museums. Generally speaking, history is the epitome of a country. We can learn the history through visiting the museum. From these actual and accurate data, it is easier for people to think about the country by themselves. Like the America, most early residents are migrated from the England, so people can guess that the culture, language, even daily habits in America is similar to in England. In addition, visiting the museum is not only to know a country easily, but also to save time for people. Only about two days does it take, can you learn about a country.

In conclusion, the issue that reading the newspapers and magazines is not convincing and visiting the museums in the country is a better way.

最近的几个题目类似，我的最近3篇几乎一样……
建议用doc版，复制过来的经常有点问题。