Daily Wringting by 蹲着的猫

wqr619UID: 3007621

修改总结(从陶太郎那里学来的，发现真是个好办法)
2月11日
陶太郎修改：
1. for both 而不是 both for
2.competitive 而不是 competenced
3.while 只能连接两个分句！！！

2月16日
阿达修改：
1.“I depend my statement on” 改成“my statement depend on”
2."food of low quality" 改成“low quality food”
3.But作为句子开头过于口语话，改成别的副词

2月17日
阿达修改：
1.statistics 用 released； survey用conduct
2.which从句不要连用
3.truth最好不要用，不然过于夸张

2月20日
阿达修改：
1.本来想表达non of one's busisness，但感觉这样讲有点口语化，就用了irrelevant这个词。。可是这个词是不切题的意思。。似乎也不对。。想改成unrelated不知可否？
2.结尾过于绝对化。。把题目都说大了
本来是年轻人有影响力，变成了有影响力的只有年轻人
By的修改：
1.take something into account
2.what's more应该用what is more

2月21日
阿达修改：
1.题目：虽然科技的发展是无止境的，但是人类的生活质量最重要的进步已经发生了。
我的论述局限在物质生活，可以扩展到精神人文关怀方面。

2月22日
阿达修改：
选择例子的问题：就此楼主写的时候也很纠结。。限定的时间里面想不出什么好的例子了。。就十分狗血地用了个小孩买面条的例子。。。T.T

2月23日
阿达修改：
1.being entangled in heavy workload 好词~~~学到了~~~
2.用might代替may
3.more accessible
4.有关论点：赶脚还是阿达的“具体问题具体分析”的论点比较好~~~
蜗牛修改：
1.注意转折词however的用法
2.论证可以用对比

2月27日（修改2月5日的作文）
阿达修改：
1.注意转折词的用法
2.电影包含现实主义元素用“movie embodied with...”
3.take sth for example太口语化
4.captivate

idealibtUID: 2667256

是1/31日的作文么？ 1/31的题目如下~

pls check

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? College or University should offer students more preparation before they start working.

wqr619UID: 3007621

2月1日Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? People who cannot accept criticism will not succeed in a team.

Critisim plays a crucial role in people’s progress. Nobody is born perfect and can make sure to avoid making mistakes. When it comes to team work or cooperation, accecpting cirtisims from others becomes even more important than self-work. Because exchanging ideas and perspectives is the essence of cooperation and team spirit. People can not improve themseves to succeed without accepting criticism.
Rejecting others critisisms and advice will simply turn a man into an arrogant and self-centered character. Once a group work depends entirely on a leader’s idea, the whole team work is meaningless and lacks dynamic power. The change of the great politician in China - Chairman Mao can illustrate this point. Mao used to be a great and talented military and politician leader and succeeded to build the new China after the civil war. His success owes moslty to his leader charisma as well as his willingness to accept different opnions. However, his leading method changed from democratic into autocratic after he became an idol of almost every Chinese citizen. He rejected the suggestions from other leaders ,such as Deng, to develop China’s economy, while depended mostly on his own will to lauch the Cultural Revolution. Even in the area of politics, where one man’s will can influence 1.3 billion people, teamwork spirit still plays an important part. Avoiding criticism can only leads to failure.
One can improve himself greatly by accepting others’ opinions and even criticism. Even at such a information time, no one can assure to master the knowledge from all fields. When a team aims at building a factory ajacent to a city, social science student probably concerns more about cultural and societal effect, while an engineer cares about the cost of the building. A environmentalists may critisize the architect of his neglect of factory pollution. It is the criticism from different aspect that makes a project perfect and thorough.
Team work pattern requires abundant ideas and perspectives which will naturally generate criticisms. To admit mistakes and accept difference is the first step to succeed. In no circumstances can one refuse others’ ideas and neglect opinions from other fields. Arrogance and self-centeredness lead to nothing but failure.
大求拍砖

sodapengUID: 3242849

不然咱俩换着先改吧=- =

kikyou_lrUID: 3228606

蹲着的猫.doc (30.5 KB, 下载次数: 38)

2012-2-2 10:52:48 上传

下载次数: 38

我是来响应楼主号召——狂拍的
见附件

wqr619UID: 3007621

改得好精彩啊~~~泪奔~~~大谢~~~~ 5# kikyou_lr

wqr619UID: 3007621

2月2日 110304NA Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? The most important problems affecting our society today could be solved within our lifetime. #

There’s no guarantee that the most significant societal problem can be solved within out lifetime. Usually, this kind of problem concerns the common characteristic of people in the society, which may take centuries to be eradicated. We may improve our society before death. However, as long as human hasn’t evolve into a perfectly self-less creature, this crucial problem will always exist.
It is universally admitted that people are born greedy and self-centered. Most societal problems derive from this human nature and can not be settled permanently. The economical recession, the high unemployment rate and the severe political and military conflict are all threatening problems in need of solution. Government can surely decrease the unemployment rate by adding more job positions, and assuage the financial crisis with large amount of investment. Also, the United Union can protest against the war. But can we eradicate all these problems forever? The financial crisis will burst one after another as history told us. This is caused by the rule of financial market and mostly people’s unlimited greed for wealth. There will always be gold diggers in the market ,who can sophisticatedly build stock bubbles so as to make a fortune. And when it comes to military fight, the rule is similar. Countries won’t stop care about its own profit, so politicians and military forces won’t cease fire once the countries profit is threatened. Is it even possible for countries like America and Russian to destroy their own nuclear weapon? The answer is definitely no. So a struggle for the right to possess nuclear power will continue even after we die.
Nevertheless, the basic characteristic of human can not stop us from being optimistic. It is known for all that society is getting better. Centuries ago, when slavery was legal, the African American led a miserable life and had to bear all the bullies and injustice. Now the off-springs of those old slaves can even become the president of the country. History illustrates us a lot of obvious improvement of society

In conclusion, people have to face the fact that societal problems will always exists, which will harm and threaten our living for good. But never should any one of us lose faith to improve the situation. All our effort for a better society should be recognized and encouraged.

骆嫣婷UID: 3179118

蹲着的猫by骆嫣.doc (26 KB, 下载次数: 12)

2012-2-2 16:27:38 上传

下载次数: 12

2月1日 改好了~
改慢了，希望楼主不要介意

猛龙过江UID: 3220220

昨天加班，回复晚了，望见谅，请参考！

wqr619UID: 3007621

猛龙兄修改地太专业了。。学到了不少~大谢~ 9# 猛龙过江

wqr619UID: 3007621

唉。。确实赶脚我写的文章结构不太好~~谢谢~~ 8# 骆嫣婷

nicholaseUID: 2859724

There’s no guarantee that the most significant societal（这个词牛！） problem can be solved within out（our） lifetime. Usually, this kind of problem concerns the common characteristic of people in the society, which may takes centuries to be eradicated（这个词牛！）. We may improve our society before death. However, as long as human hasn’t evolve into a perfectly self-less creature, this crucial
（这个词牛！） problem will always exist.
" ^+ O- N7 P6 A* r% SIt is universally admitted that people are born greedy and self-centered. Most societal problems derive（这个词牛！） from this human nature and can not be settled permanently. The economical recession, the high unemployment rate and the severe political and military conflict are all problems in need of solution. Government can surely decrease the unemployment rate by adding more job positions, and assuage the financial crisis with large amount of investment. Also, the United Union can protest against the war. But can we eradicate all these problems forever? The financial crisis will burst one after another as history told us. This is caused by the rule of financial market and mostly people’s unlimited greed for wealth. There will always be gold diggers in the market ,who can sophisticatedly build stock bubbles so as to make a fortune. And when it comes to military fight, the rule is similar. Countries won’t stop care about its own profit, so politicians and military forces won’t cease fire once the countries profit is threatened. Is it even possible for countries like America and Russian to destroy their own nuclear weapon? The answer is definitely no. (这句话牛) So a struggle for the right to possess nuclear power will continue even after we die.& n. m. z9 m+ w
Nevertheless, the basic characteristic of human can not stop us from being optimistic. It is known for all that society is getting better. Centuries ago, when slavery was legal, the African American led a miserable life and had to bear all the bullies and injustice. Now the off-springs of those old slaves can even become the president of the country. History illustrates us a lot of obvious improvement of society & K: U6 [& a1 K8 v; V3 p' [

2 _3 G% N+ p& f$ y& j1 NIn conclusion, people have to face the fact that societal problems will always exists, which will harm and threaten our living for good. But never should any one of us lose faith to improve the situation. All our efforts for a better society should be recognized and encouraged.

改这篇文章。。。压力巨大。。。。与其说改不如说是学习，因为我已经不知道该怎么帮你改了，受益匪浅！！
逻辑异常顺畅！ 楼主考过GRE吧？！！！膜拜！！以后天天来看你写的文章！！！

楼主有时间的话帮我改一下我的结尾吧？ 我一直都不知道该怎么结尾。
你写文章的结尾段时，遵照神马原则吗？？给一些建议吧，谢谢了！！

lovely_hippo123UID: 3209964

2月2日 110304NA Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? The most important problems affecting our society today could be solved within our lifetime. #2 r/ Z( h+ |3 R, u5 Z6

There’s no guarantee that the most significant societal problem can be solved within out lifetime. Usually, this kind of problem concerns the common characteristic of people in the society, which may take centuries to be eradicated. We may improve our society before death. However, as long as human hasn’t evolve into a perfectly self-less creature, this crucial problem will always exist.

7 d2 B3 K& ^6 y+ |9 b, B$ {: lIt is universally admitted that people are born greedy and self-centered. Most societal problems derive from this human nature and can not-不可分开写 be settled permanently.
1The economical recession, the high unemployment rate and the severe political and-两个and去一个
military conflict are all threatening problems in need of solution.2
Government can surely decrease the unemployment rate by adding more job positions, and assuage the financial crisis with large amount of investment.3 Also, the United Union can protest against the war. 4But can we eradicate all these problems forever? –一下子写出来这么多问题，很厉害，可是这样太多了。。。其实完全可以有重点的讲一个啊。你说呢？你完全可以先把经济的说完1The financial crisis will burst one after another as history told us. This is caused by the rule of financial market and mostly people’s unlimited greed for wealth. There will always be gold diggers in the market, who can sophisticatedly build stock bubbles so as to make a fortune.然后再说战争2
And when it comes to military fight, the rule is similar. Countries won’t stop care about its own profit, so politicians and military forces won’t cease fire once the countries profit is threatened. Is it even possible for countries like America and Russian to destroy their own nuclear weapon? The answer is definitely no. So a struggle for the right to possess nuclear power will continue even after we die把经济和战争分开写，跪求.


Nevertheless, the basic characteristic of human can not stop us from being optimistic. It is known for all that society is getting better. Centuries ago, when slavery was legal, the African American led a miserable life and had to bear all the bullies and injustice. Now the off-springs of those old slaves can even become the president of the country. History illustrates us a lot of obvious improvement of society # B0 m' X) P8 P$ T. g
% X" |9 U  u1 R% d5 l2 Z% C
In conclusion, people have to face the fact that societal problems will always exists, which will harm and threaten our living for good. But never should any one of us lose faith to improve the situation. All our effort for a better society should be recognized and encouraged.9 F

楼主，在段落之间最好空一行吧。。你的排版看起来好累的感觉呢。。。中间两段是主要观点，为什么文字分布悬殊那么大呢？ 楼主觉的呢？我建议楼主去看一下今天nichiolase同学写的这篇独立写作吧。。。感觉挺好的，排版，以及行文。。。觉得第二段太多内容，有点抽象的感觉。如果你能把它分好，变成了五段，那就完美了哈哈。。

我觉得楼主两种观点都写挺好的，G都这么写的吧。。因为这样比较好发挥嘿嘿。
一起加油。。。

wqr619UID: 3007621

我在限定的时间内确实不会考虑那么多结构的问题~~多谢指出哈哈~~加油加油~~ 13# lovely_hippo123

wqr619UID: 3007621

2月3日 110815NA One of your classmates needs help with some schoolwork. Which solution would you recommend your classmate should do: to ask you for hlpe or to find a professinal tutor for help. Include reasons and details to in your response. 题目真奇怪。。像口语题。。真难过要憋出那么多道理出来。。' d1 _% j+ v' ^* q5 a

I think my classmate should go straight to the tutor instead of me. As for academic problems, the tutor with abundant professional knowledge can be of great help and benefit for one’s study. My classmate can discuss the schoolwork with me first and turn to professional help later. Communication with tutor is highly recommended.

Students who consult their tutor can not only get help with schoolwork, but also obtain some thorough advice about the course study. Peers from class who share the same academical level just lack enough experience to offer beneficial suggestions. For instance, when facing a puzzle about some academic tasks, your classmates may probably recommend you to look up to some reference books with direct answers or solutions. While a tutor may encourage and even lead you to find a solution yourself. Which is a better study method? The answer is self-evident. Tutor’s help will foster independent study habit, which will benefit one’s academical abilities to a great extent. In this case, if I was the one to offer help, I simply wouldn’t want to waste time
to encourage my classmate to work on his/her own. It must be time-consuming, and my peer most likely won’t follow my unprofessional suggestion. But I believe a paid tutor would be patient and ,most importantly, qualified enough to guide my classmate.

Another problem related to help from classmates is the possibilities of plagiarism. It’s not uncommon in today’s universities that a students would copy homework of a relatively good grades classmates. Therefore, it is quite possible that when a classmate turn to a better grades student for help, he/she may not resist the temptation to copy the nearly correct answer. And as for the ‘better’ student, he/she would most likely accept that requirement , rather than bother to offer guidance. This situation is surely not encouraging.

In conclusion, as a relatively ‘better’ student, I would naturally prefer my class mate to consult a tutor, for both his/her interests and my own.