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发表于 2010-5-20 23:24:12 |显示全部楼层
先占啦

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发表于 2010-5-21 13:56:21 |显示全部楼层
本帖最后由 kingwyf87 于 2010-5-22 12:27 编辑

〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓

                                                            
1010G精英组】E小组第19次作业

〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓

Argument209

The following recommendation was made by the Human Resources Manager to the board of directors

of the Fancy Toy Company.

"In the last three quarters of this year, under the leadership of our president, Pat Salvo, our profits

have fallen considerably. Thus, we should ask for her resignation in return for a generous severance

package. In Pat's place, we should appoint Rosa Winnings. Rosa is currently president of Starlight

Jewelry, a company whose profits have increased dramatically over the past several years. Although

we will have to pay Rosa twice the salary that Pat has been receiving, it will be well worth it because

we can soon expect our profits to increase considerably."

●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●

                                 写作样式模板

●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●

===========
  Logical Chain
===========


===========
     论点提纲
===========


===========
     习作正文
===========


=======================

Revised By

=======================   


●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●

拍文顺序

1-->7

7-->1

●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●
Nothing is so mild and gentle as courage, nothing so cruel and pitiless as cowardice.

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发表于 2010-5-21 13:56:37 |显示全部楼层
本帖最后由 kingwyf87 于 2010-5-25 23:30 编辑

===========
  Logical Chain
===========

1 In the last three quarters of this year our profits have fallen considerably under the leadership of Pat Salvo
2 1 à we should ask for her resignation
3 Rosa is currently president of Starlight Jewelry, a company whose profits have increased dramatically over the past several years
4 3 à we should appoint Rosa Winnings
5 Although we will have to pay Rosa twice the salary that Pat has been receiving
6 5 à it will be well worth it because we can soon expect our profits to increase considerably.

===========
     习作正文
===========


In this argument, the author suggests that the company should appoint Rosa Winnings (RW) and ask Pat Salvo (PS) for her resignation. To strengthen his recommendation, the arguer points out that the company’s profits have fallen considerably during the last three quarters under the leadership of PS, while the profits of RW’s company have increased dramatically for years. This argument suffers some critical flaws that seriously undermine the author’s conclusion and accordingly is not thoroughly well-reasoned. The main flaws of the letter will be discussed respectively.

To begin with, the major problem with this recommendation is that the arguer does not give the firm evidence that it is the PS directs correlation to the falling profits. It is entirely possible that there are other factors causing the fallen of the profits, such as the economic depression. We may assume that the whole local area suffers the finical crisis which leads to the profits of all the companies in that area have fallen considerably. Maybe, thanks to the PS, the profits of Fancy Toy Company have not lost than that of other companies. It is also possible that the PS has helped the company make huge profits, while only “recent”—three quarters of this year—the profits has fallen. That is to say the company may also make large profits which are merely not as much as before but the situation may become promising in the near future.

In addition, the manager provides no evidence to affirm the assumption that RW has been primarily reason for the increased profits of the Starlight Jewelry Company. As we know, enhancing the profitability of one company cannot be a one man job as there are many compiled reasons in business. It is possible that there are innumerable business elites in RW’s company who do the excellent job keeping the profitability for the company. RW, however, do nothing but to employ such distinguished staffs working for him. Maybe the Starlight Jewelry Company is a family enterprise and RW inherit from father who decides to let his child ran the company. Although it seems that the profits of the company has increased under the leadership of RW, the well business relationship of RW’s father and his supervision of the whole company are the true reasons responsible for the development of the company.   

The last but not the least, even if PS does not do a good job for his company, and RW is responsible for the increasing profitability of the Starlight Jewelry Company, it is doubtful that RW’s management experience is applicable to the Fancy Toy Company, which apparently belongs to a different industry. The author provides no evidence that RW is good at the new job and capable to dramatically bring the Fancy Toy Company profits. What’s more, the manger also fails to consider that there is no one else could do better job than the RW. Even if RW is the best candidate for the present of the company, the arguer also lacks the evidence that the company’s profits would increase considerably soon. Absent additional information about PS and RW, the author’s assentation is not credible to support his recommendation.

To sum up, this argument, while seems well-supported at first, has several flaws as discussed above. Hence it is unacceptable and not persuasive as it stands. Yet, it could be substantiated by provide more detailed information about the real objective reason why the company’s profits have fallen considerably. I would also need to know much more information about RW, whether she is the very person that can increase the company’s profits, which I can evaluate the Human Resources Manager’s recommendation more efficiently.

=======================

Revised By nanfeng25899

=======================



批改标注:
1。红色,表示“错误”
2。洋红,表示“用法欠妥当”
3。蓝色,是我的批注
4。绿色,表示“很精彩的文字”


In this argument, the author suggests that the company should appoint Rosa Winnings (RW)【一般加上as~】 and ask Pat Salvo (PS) for her resignation. To strengthen his recommendation, the arguer points out that the company’s profits have fallen considerably during the last three quarters under the leadership of PS, while the profits of RW’s company have increased dramatically for years. This argument suffers some critical flaws that seriously undermine the author’s conclusion and accordingly is not thoroughly well-reasoned. The main flaws of the letter will be discussed respectively.

【第一段的结构很清晰~】

To begin with, the major problem with this recommendation is that the arguer does not give the firm evidence that it is the PS directs correlation to the falling profits【语法问题。改成the falling profits results from the lack of PS’s leadership.】 . It is entirely possible that there are other factors causing the fallen of the profits, such as the economic depression. We may assume that the whole local area suffers the finical crisis which leads to the profits of all the companies in that area have fallen considerably. Maybe, thanks to the PS, the profits of Fancy Toy Company have not lost【than和比较级搭配。改成 have declined less】 than that of other companies. It is also possible that the PS has helped the company make huge profits, while only “recent”—three quarters of this year—the profits has fallen. That is to say the company may also make large profits which are merely not as much as before but the situation may become promising in the near future.【感觉上有些问题,P的公司最近3个季度还是亏损了啊,没有利润。。。为什么还说有巨大的利润?】


【本段攻击的谬误点比较清晰,理由也比较充分】

In addition, the manager provides no evidence to affirm the assumption that RW has been primarily【修饰名词用形容词。Primary】 reason for the increased profits of the Starlight Jewelry Company. As we know, enhancing the profitability of one company cannot be a one man job as there are many compiled【?】 reasons in business. It is possible that there are innumerable business elites in RW’s company who do the excellent job keeping the profitability for the company. RW, however, do nothing but to employ such distinguished staffs【staff是集合名词】 working for him【him/her】. Maybe the Starlight Jewelry Company is a family enterprise and RW inherit【及物,加上it】 from father who decides to let his child ran【run】 the company. Although it seems that the profits of the company has increased under the leadership of RW, the well business relationship【好的商业关系?应该说广阔的人脉吧】 of RW’s father and his supervision of the whole company are the true reasons responsible for the development of the company.   



【本段的逻辑和原因比较清晰,就是错误相对多了一些】

The last but not the least, even if PS does not do a good job for his company, and RW is responsible for the increasing profitability of the Starlight Jewelry Company, it is doubtful that RW’s management experience is applicable to the Fancy Toy Company, which apparently【题目中没有明确指出不是一个行业】belongs to a different industry. The author provides no evidence that RW is good at the new job and capable to dramatically bring the Fancy Toy Company profits. What’s more, the manger also fails to consider that there is no one else【加上who】 could do better job than the RW. Even if RW is the best candidate for the present of the company, the arguer also lacks the evidence that the company’s profits would increase considerably soon. Absent【用法不对】additional information about PS and RW, the author’s assentation【?】 is not credible to support his recommendation.


【本段的谬误点攻击的比较多,我觉得真正的考试时候,选主要的谬误点,深入攻击就成~~】

To sum up, this argument, while seems【while seeming】 well-supported at first, has several flaws as discussed above. Hence it is unacceptable and not persuasive as it stands. Yet, it could be substantiated by provide more detailed information about the real objective reason why the company’s profits have fallen considerably. I would also need to know much more information about RW, whether she is the very person that can increase the company’s profits, which I can evaluate the Human Resources Manager’s recommendation【没说是HR的建议吧】 more efficiently.



综合评价:

1 整个文章在逻辑方面比较清晰
2 谬误点的选取比较全面,但是我个人的建议是抓住重点的深入分析比较好
3 语言表述上相对来说模板句子的痕迹比较重。。。
4 后面的语法错误多了一点
Nothing is so mild and gentle as courage, nothing so cruel and pitiless as cowardice.

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发表于 2010-5-21 15:40:02 |显示全部楼层
本帖最后由 nanfeng25899 于 2010-5-28 21:11 编辑

===========
  Logical Chain
===========
1 前提一:在过去3个季度里,现任总裁P的领导下,我们的利润下降明显
2 前提二:R现在是S珠宝店的头,这家公司的利润在过去几年里一直急剧增加
3 前提三:因为尽管R的薪水是P的两倍,但他会使我们的利润迅速显著上升
4 结论:我们应任命R,并要求P辞职。

===========
     论点提纲
===========

1 P公司利润的下滑不一定是因为P的领导无方,可能是因为前人留下的烂摊子或者是整体行业水平的下降
2 即使要解雇PR,也不一定能带来利润,因为行业不同,员工不同
3 雇用R所来的利润也不一定比起将同样的前用于其他的方面更加值得

===========
     习作正文
===========

The conclusion that we should fire Pat Salvo(S) who is responsible for the decreasing profit and hire Rosa Winnings(R) whose company is profitable, at the first glance, seems to be tenable and well-presented, but actually not reasonable just based on the facts in the arguments. Then, I will figure the flaws out respectively.

Firstly, the dropping profit may not result from the inability of P as it stands. P is the current president in the company, but there are no explicit evidences about the financial condition before she took office. If the previous presidents leave her a mess, which is the substantial reason of the deficit, how could we blame in her? In addition, in many cases, although the president plays a vital role in the management of a firm, whether the employees devote themselves to their work will largely determine the future of a company. Therefore, without considering all this alternatives carefully, we would better not rush to the decision of firing P.


Also, even if we replace P with R and even pay twice salary to the new leader, the disparity of the industry and the morality of the employees in both companies are bound to make great difference to the outcomes. R, as the incumbent presidents of the Starlight Jewelry, perhaps masters the skills about how to increase the sales of the Jewelry and have a well- round comprehension of the Jewelry industry, whereas no evidences about she have the same understanding and insights in other industries. What' more, if the rich profit is attributable to the high morale of the stuff in the Starlight Jewelry rather than the leadership of R, we cannot confirm that R will bring our company the identical profit.


Finally, is the twice salary which will paid to R well worth? We should throw doubts on this opinion. If the industry recession is the criminal of the deficit, this twice salary will not only increase the considerable cost but also make he financial condition worse. Moreover, currently, to help a company get rid of the trouble, building the culture of a company has been an effective strategy. Give the employees a reason to care about their customers, their colleagues and about how to do business right. If we really put the same sum into these aspects, it is more likely that the profit of our company will increase in a faster rate.


Overall, before we make the decision to fire our incumbent president P and let R take office, think twice. Without digging into the real reason for the declining profit in the last quarters and thinking over the question that whether there is better way to cope with this trouble, changing the presidents is definitely not a sensible idea.


=======================

Revised By Finn

=======================   

语法问题 批注 精彩表达

The conclusion that we (用第一人称合不合适?我觉得第三人称好一点) should fire Pat Salvo(S) who is responsible for the decreasing profit and hire Rosa Winnings(R) whose company is profitable, (前一句话已经完整,使用句号) at the first glance, seems to be tenable and well-presented, but actually not reasonable just based on the facts in the arguments. Then, I will figure the flaws out respectively.

Firstly, the dropping profit may not result from the inability of P as it stands. P is the current president in the company, but there are no explicit evidences about the financial condition before she (名字可以看出是女的啊?) took office. If the previous presidents leave her a mess, which is the substantial reason of the deficit, how could we blame in her (好像常用这个blame sth. on sb. 把某事归咎于某人)? In addition, in many cases, although the president plays a vital role in the management of a firm, whether the employees devote themselves to their work will largely determine the future of a company. Therefore, without considering all this alternatives carefully, we would better not rush to the decision of firing (感觉这个词用在这不太好) P.

Also, even if we replace P with R and even pay twice salary to the new leader, the disparity of the industry and the morality (员工道德的不一致?想表达什么呢?是不是改为素质要好一些呢?) of the employees in both companies are bound to make great difference to the outcomes. R, as the incumbent presidents of the Starlight Jewelry, perhaps masters the skills about how to increase the sales of the Jewelry and have a well-round comprehension of the Jewelry industry, whereas no evidences about she have the same understanding and insights (表达的不太好familiar concern等词或者词组) in other industries. What' more, if the rich profit is attributable to the high morale of the stuff in the Starlight Jewelry rather than the leadership of R, we cannot confirm that R will bring our company the identical profit.

Finally, is the twice salary which will paid to R well worth? We should throw doubts on this opinion. If the industry recession is the criminal of the deficit, this twice salary will not only increase the considerable cost but also make he (the?) financial condition worse. Moreover, currently, to help a company get rid of the trouble, building the culture of a company has been an effective strategy. Give the employees a reason to care about their customers, their colleagues and about how to do business right. If we really put the same sum into these aspects, it is more likely that the profit of our company will increase in a faster rate.

Overall, before we make the decision to fire our incumbent president P and let R take office, think twice. Without digging into the real reason for the declining profit in the last quarters and thinking over the question that whether there is better way to cope with this trouble, changing the presidents is definitely not a sensible idea.


小结:1、文章整体流畅,语法错误较少,但需要注意相关表达。
2、后面的训练主要集中于逻辑和句法结构的训练。

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发表于 2010-5-22 12:29:59 |显示全部楼层
帮小肯~
Nothing is so mild and gentle as courage, nothing so cruel and pitiless as cowardice.

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发表于 2010-5-22 13:12:40 |显示全部楼层
〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓

                                                            
1010G精英组】E小组第20次作业

〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓

Argument020

The following appeared in a letter to the editor of the Balmer Island Gazette.

"The population of Balmer Island increases to 100,000 duing the summer months. To reduce the

number of accidents involving mopeds and pedestrians, the town council of Balmer Island should

limit the number of mopeds rented by each of the island's six moped and bicycle rental companies

from 50 per day to 30 per day during the summer season. By limiting the number of rentals, the

town council is sure to attain the 50 percent reduction in moped accidents that was achieved last

year in the neighboring island of Torseau, when Torseau's town council enforced similar limits on

moped rentals."

●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●

                                 写作样式模板

●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●

===========
  Logical Chain
===========


===========
     论点提纲
===========


===========
     习作正文
===========


=======================

Revised By

=======================   


●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●

拍文顺序


●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●
Nothing is so mild and gentle as courage, nothing so cruel and pitiless as cowardice.

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发表于 2010-5-22 13:13:15 |显示全部楼层
占~
Nothing is so mild and gentle as courage, nothing so cruel and pitiless as cowardice.

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发表于 2010-5-22 15:46:27 |显示全部楼层
我占

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发表于 2010-5-22 23:58:55 |显示全部楼层
果断占
杀G也需用牛刀~!

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发表于 2010-5-23 11:02:03 |显示全部楼层
===========
  Logical Chain
===========
1 前提一:B的人口增加到了100000
2 前提二:为了减少事故,B市委限制当地的公司每天只能出借5030辆助力车。
3 前提三:隔壁去年这样做取得了这样的成绩
4 结论:降低租车数量,镇里的事故会减少50%

===========
     论点提纲
===========

1 人口的增长并不一定会增加事故,所以制订限制助力车数量的政策市不必要的
2 即使需要制订政策,也要考虑到出事故的助力车不一定是租来的,可能是自己的车
3 最后,就算在B实行了和在T地相似的政策,效果也不一定会好,因为两个岛的地形人口状况不一定相同

===========
     习作正文
===========


The conclusion that the moped accidents rate in the Balmer Island(B) will drop the fifty percent by implementing the similar policy of the neighboring island of Torseau(T), at the first glance, seems to be trustful and well-presented, but not completely reasonable when we think over the reasoning behind this argument. Then, I will figure out the flaws in the plausible argument respectively.


Firstly, there is no necessity to force the strict limitation on the numbers of the rental moped because of the roar population. The newcomers may not be a sign of more accidents due to the facts that it is considerably possible that the awareness of the local people in the safe aspects are surprisingly high and the government has put a large amount of money into the construction of the traffic system to decrease the accidents. In this way, although the population have increased, it is necessary to carry out the limits on the moped.


Also, there are no explicit facts to inform us that all the mopeds involved in the accidents come from the local moped and bicycle companies. There are the odds that the "criminals" which should be responsible for the accidents are the personal moped, which means that putting the limitation on the company will be not only useless to reduce the accidents rate but also possible to bring about the new complains of those firms because of the decrease of the profit. As a consequence, without illustrating the proofs to substantiate that the origin of the moped involved in the accidents, the council would better not rush to make the totally unfair decision.


Finally, there is false analogy between the T and S when it comes to the accidents involving the moped and pedestrians. There is dozens of factors that will have a great influence on the ultimate result of the policy. For instance, there is a good chance that the terrain and the population in the both islands are thoroughly distinct which result in that the strategies are not suitable for B. In addition, although the council in T attained the 50 percent reduction, it is possible that after this decrease the accidents in T still are far more than those in B. Therefore, under this circumstance, the policy carried out in B may make the situation worse.


Overall, before the council makes their mind to adopt the policy enforced in T to limit the rental mopeds, they might as well think twice. Without taking into consideration the relation between the population and the accidents, the date about the origin of the mopeds involving in the accidents and the disparity of these two islands, the council cannot convince the local citizens that this policy will make a significant contribution to the reduction of the accidents.


=======================

Revised By

=======================  

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发表于 2010-5-23 19:38:21 |显示全部楼层
本帖最后由 kingwyf87 于 2010-5-25 18:44 编辑

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【1010G精英组】E小组第21次作业

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Issue138

"Only through mistakes can there be discovery or progress."


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Nothing is so mild and gentle as courage, nothing so cruel and pitiless as cowardice.

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发表于 2010-5-23 19:39:04 |显示全部楼层
本帖最后由 kingwyf87 于 2010-5-28 16:56 编辑

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The issue of that only through mistakes can there be discovery or progress is a complex and controversial one. Different people hold different opinions due to their respective ways of looking at an issue. In my point of view, I agree with the speaker’s assertion that mistakes, to some extent, could be beneficial for our discovery or progress. However, the speaker ignores to concern that we can still learn the discovery or progress from predecessor or other ways. Making mistakes sometimes may result in severe consequences that we cannot afford.

Admittedly, no one is immune from making mistakes. People learn to accomplish new tasks primarily though learning mistakes they have committed. When we are infants, we learn how to walk by failing down again and again. When we are grown up, we learn social skills by the way of suffering innumerable awkward social encounters. By making mistakes, we can figure out the most efficient scientific method. For example, Edison, who is one of the great inventors, invents the electric light, the most useful thing to human being in our daily life. Whereas, people may not know it is the trail-and-error that contributes to the invention of electric light. The crucial component in the light is the lamp-wick which can make the light more brightness and have a long life. Edison tired lots of lamp-wicks made by different kinds of materials, but after many failures he finally found that the tungsten which is the most suitable material and eventually brought the light to the dark world.

However, people can have a progress without necessarily making mistakes. To learn from mistakes is just one way for us to improve ourselves. We still have many good choices to have a progress by learning from history, from ancestors, form books, and from our friends. For example, when we study in a particular area such agriculture, we can learn from the experience which passed down by the predecessors. As we know, one of the most influential factors of raising crops is the weather that determines which crops are suitable for the local area and when or how to plant them appropriately. Some place is suitable to plant wheat, while others to plant rice. And some areas’ crop could be planted many times in one year, while others’ planted only once a year. All the framing experience that we learned from the predecessors can make sure that we are going to have a heavily foison for a coming future.

In addition, sometimes that we may assume that discovery or progress can be obtained only by making mistakes is because of education system. In China, the key concept of traditional education is frustration, that is to say, we learn through mistakes, failures, and even catastrophes. Educators believe that such miserable experiences would make people well-aware of what’s the right thing and how to correct their misbehaviors or mistakes. And people mistakenly think the more mistakes they make the more progress they will have. It is, however, deviating from the real aim of rules the real educators, avoiding mistakes instead of making the same again. What’s more, making mistakes may lead to a disaster. For example, considering a scene that many students do some chemical experiments in the school lab, one of these students fails to follow the instructions hanging on the wall. And an exploding may happens, causing many students death, because of improperly using the dangerous chemicals. Of course, the student, if survive, must a learn lesson from his faults, but we cannot allow people to do so at expenses of losing people’s lives.

To sum up, basing my conclusion on the illustrations and exposition mentioned above, accordingly, I hold opinion that mistakes, sometimes, could be good for people who can discover or progress thought them. But, usually, people can have the discovery or progress from our predecessor, not only from mistakes. Even worse, the mistakes may result in severe consequences, which people could not afford.

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Revised By 小肯0113

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The issue of that only through mistakes can there be (a) discovery or (a) progress is a(去掉) complex and controversial one(去掉). Different people hold different opinions due to their respective ways of looking at an(去掉) issues. In my point of view, I agree with the speaker’s assertion that mistakes, to some extent, could be beneficial for our discovery or progress. However, the speaker ignores to concern that we can still learn the discovery or progress from predecessor or(改成and) other ways. Making mistakes sometimes may result in severe (?)consequences that we cannot afford.

Admittedly, no one is immune from making mistakes. People learn to accomplish new tasks primarily though learning mistakes they have committed. When we are infants, we learn how to walk by failing down again and again. When we are grown up, we learn social skills by the way of suffering innumerable awkward social encounters. By making mistakes, we can figure out the most efficient scientific method. For example, Edison, who is one of the great inventors, invents the electric light, the most useful thing to human being in our daily life. Whereas, people may not know
(that) it is the(去掉the)
trail-and-error that contributes to the invention of electric light. The crucial component in the light is the lamp-wick which can make the light more brightness and have a long life. Edison tired lots of lamp-wicks made by different kinds of materials, but after many failures he finally found that the tungsten which is the most suitable material and eventually brought the light to the dark world.

However, people can have a progress without necessarily making mistakes. To learn from mistakes is just one way for us to improve ourselves. We still have many good choices to
have a (去掉,直接加progress做动词)progress by learning from history, from ancestors, form books, and from our friends. For example, when we study in a particular area such agriculture, we can learn from the experience which passed down by the predecessors. As we know, one of the most influential factors of raising crops is the weather that determines which crops are suitable for the local area and when or how to plant them appropriately. Some place is suitable to plant wheat, while others to plant rice. And some areas’ crop could be planted many times in one year, while others’ planted only once a year. All the framing experience that we learned from the predecessors can make sure that we are going to have a heavily foison for a coming future.
(感觉这一段有点牵强,你的意思是说我们可以通过前人的经验来提高自己,也就是不需要自己去犯错误,但是说得好像有点不清,有前半句的意思)

In addition, sometimes that we may assume that discovery or progress can be obtained only by making mistakes is because of education system. In China, the key concept of traditional education is frustration, that is to say, we learn through mistakes, failures, and even catastrophes. Educators believe that such miserable experiences would make people well-aware of what’s the right thing to do and how to correct their misbehaviors or mistakes. And people mistakenly think the more mistakes they make the more progress they will have.
It is, however, deviating from the real aim of rules the real educators--avoiding mistakes instead of making the same again.(这句话很怪,感觉和上一句接不太起来) What’s more, making mistakes may lead to a disaster. For example, considering a scene that many students do some chemical experiments in the school lab, one of these students fails to follow the instructions hanging on the wall. And an exploding may happens, causing many students death, because of improperly using the dangerous chemicals. Of course, the student, if survive, must a learn lesson from his faults, but we cannot allow people to do so at expenses of losing people’s lives. (这一段来个总结的话放在段落首,更明了,像前面几段一样)

To sum up, basing my conclusion on the illustrations and exposition mentioned above, accordingly, I hold opinion that mistakes, sometimes, could be good for people who can discover or progress thought them. But, usually, people can have the discovery or progress from our predecessor, not only from mistakes. Even worse, the mistakes may result in severe consequences, which people could not afford.


我感觉例子太长了,例子里又有说理,看得有点混乱,别的都比较好了~~~
Nothing is so mild and gentle as courage, nothing so cruel and pitiless as cowardice.

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发表于 2010-5-23 20:21:39 |显示全部楼层
我占!
杀G也需用牛刀~!

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发表于 2010-5-24 07:41:55 |显示全部楼层
本帖最后由 小肯0113 于 2010-5-24 10:05 编辑

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In life, mistakes are the best way to learn. Some of the greatest discoveries are thanks to people working on differing projects and making a variety of mistakes. For instance, penicillin was found after a scientist mistakenly left a container open. This caused a mold to grow and resist bacteria, causing the scientist to research more until he found a medicine that has saved many a person’s life. The same can be said for babies. They make many mistakes in trying to speak, walk, and in trying to perform other actions.


Repetition after repetition, time after time, the baby will eventually learn from all the mistakes and start to speak, walk, and do other things properly.
If mistakes were never made, no one would ever improve and nothing would ever be discovered. Life would be dull, with everyone simply doing whatever they know. There would be no adaptation to changing environments or situations, because this usually involves making a mistaken to learn how to better adapt. The entire scientific method is based on making mistakes. A person introduces a change, observes the reaction, and then continues this process to find something new. This generally takes many trials, or mistakes, to find something new. Life is very kind to allow humans the possibility to make and learn from mistakes. Learning is a key in this process. Without learning, we would make mistakes and simply continue to do things as we always have done. This would be a tragedy, as we could not adapt or discover anything new. Thanks to learning, we can analyze our mistakes and move forward. This progression allows us to put mistakes to good use. While the act of making mistakes can be painful, it helps us learn and progress through life to a degree that other animals cannot. Thanks to mistakes, we can learn mathematics, build a building, and even go into outer space. Without the ability to make and learn from mistakes, both the world we know and humans as a species would be completely different.

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发表于 2010-5-24 20:37:11 |显示全部楼层
本帖最后由 shevava 于 2010-5-24 20:39 编辑

As an old saying goes that failure is the mother of success, discovery and progress can be made through mistakes. During the long history of the development of human being, a history full of mistakes making the evolvement proceeding continuously, great achievements have been made so that the civilization develops into such an extent nowadays.

Firstly, a lot of inventions are discovered through many experiments at the cost of failures. Before the first plane flied in the sky, the brothers of Right had failed many times and at last they succeeded for they learned a lot from the failures and modified the mistakes. And also before Copernicus asserted that the sun is the centre of the universe, while the others of that time argued that the earth is the center of the universe. As time went by, the heliocentric theory proved right. All these demonstrate that the truth appears after arguments and on the way, mistakes are unavoidable.


Secondly, the mistakes made by precedents may be of great help to the followers by providing very practical data and experiment experiences, although they may mean different things to different people. As we all know that to make a discovery or progress needs not only advanced instruments but also justful method, maybe the instruments of that time are the limits for the further development. Without those, however, the practice or the mistake they make lay fundamental basis for the following people. The example of Galio is a case in point that he got his achievement with the accumulation of knowledge by those who looked and failed to see what Galileo because to use a telescope at the limit of its powers calls for long experience and intimate familiarity with one’s instrument.

Last but not least, during the process of experiments, although mistakes are made, new discoveries or progress may be discovered, and sometimes important advances can also be made when current ideas are shown to be wrong. A classic case of this occurred early in the 20th century, when the German geologist Alfred Wegener suggested that the continents were at one time connected, a theory known as continental drift. At the time, most geologists discounted Wegener’s ideas, because the Earth’s crust seemed to be fixed. But following the discovery of plate tectonics in the 1960s, in which scientists found that the Earth’s crust is actually made of moving plates, continental drift became an important part of geology.

To sum up, some people may stop their studying for fear that mistakes may take expensive failures, but without mistakes or being afraid of making mistakes, people will carry out things
short of confidence and a little progress be obtained. Always, discoveries exist only in the place that common people cannot reach, so that great discoveries are only prepared for the brave. Furthermore, they sometimes may be rewarded by the "beautiful scenes" on the way to discovery or progress. Through advances like these, discoveries and progress is constantly added to and refined. As a result, they give us an ever more detailed insight into the way the world around us.

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RE: [1010G精英组] ISSUE&ARGU 习作 by Group Energy [修改]

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