[1010G精英组] ISSUE&ARGU 习作 by Group Energy

小肯0113UID: 2590901

占~~~~！！！~~

kingwyf87UID: 2457409

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                                                             【1010G精英组】E小组第12次作业

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Argument169

The following appeared in a letter from a department chairperson to the president of Pierce University.

"Some studies conducted by Bronston College, which is also located in a small town, reveal that

both male and female professors are happier living in small towns when their spouses are also

employed in the same geographic area. Therefore, in the interest of attracting the most gifted teachers

and researchers to our faculty and improving the morale of our entire staff, we at Pierce University

should offer employment to the spouse of each new faculty member we hire. Although we cannot

expect all offers to be accepted or to be viewed as an ideal job offer, the money invested in this

effort will clearly be well spent because, if their spouses have a chance of employment, new professors

will be more likely to accept our offers."

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拍文顺序

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kingwyf87UID: 2457409

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1 both male and female professors are happier living in small towns when their spouses are also employed in the same geographic area.
2 1-> we at Pierce University should offer employment to the spouse of each new faculty member we hire
2->3 their spouses have a chance of employment, new professors will be more likely to accept our offers

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     论点提纲
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1 Bronston College的调查是否可信
2 Bronston College的做法是否同样适用于Pierce University
3 对于Pierce University是否有其他更好的方式吸引the most gifted teachers and researchers

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     习作正文
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In this letter, the chairperson suggests that in order to attract the most gifted teachers and researchers, the Pierce University should offer employment to the spouse of each new faculty members they hired. To strengthen his recommendation, the chairperson cites a study to show that professors teaching in Bronston College, which has the similar situation of Pierce University, are happily living in small towns with their spouse also working in the same area. This argument suffers some critical flaws that seriously undermine the author’s conclusion and accordingly is not thoroughly well-reasoned. The main flaws of the letter will be discussed respectively.

To begin with, the arguer ignores to indicate the study that conducted by Bronston College can be trustworthy. On the one hand, the study may involve only the small size of professors in the university which obviously cannot illustrate the real results as the samples are not sufficient enough. On the other hand, the study may be viewed the young proffers working in the university for just few years as key respondents and specially targeted, which evidently cannot represent all the professors in the university as the young may dissatisfy the working place and regret for their decision after living in the small town many years later. Thus, lacking such information about the professors and their spouses, the creditability of the study is open to doubt.

Yet another problem in this letter is that even if the study do indicates that professors in the Bronston College are satisfying with both teaching in the university and feeling happiness as their spouses living in the same area, the arguer false to think the same measures taken in Bronston College are also suitable for the Pierce University. It is quietly possible that it is because the fine weather and wonderful view surrounding in the area of Bronston College, which the Pierce University is not, that make the professor couples happily living in that small town. Maybe, expect graceful environment for local people, the small town in Bronston also provides with low rising housing costs and convenient transportation for going to the big cities, which are also attractable for professors working in Bronston College rather than the Pierce University.

The last but not the least, even if the two small towns are in the similar situation, arguer provides no evidence that the money invested in that effort will clearly be well spent and there in no other ways to attract the good teachers. The Bronston College may has good financial status, while for the Pierce University, the money spent in offering employment to the spouse of each new faculty member maybe as much as the university cannot afford. However, there are another ways to attract the excellent professors, such as increasing the salary paid for the professors, placing good equipment for their study, providing more chances for their promotion. The arguer fails to offer such sufficient reasons and consider other alternative possibilities for appealing the most gifted teachers and researchers, which make his recommendation unpersuasive as it stands.

To sum up, this argument, while seems well-supported at first, has several flaws as discussed above. Hence it is unacceptable and not persuasive as it stands. Yet, it could be substantiated by provide more detailed information about the professors and why they decide to live in the small town. I would also need the evidence that the measures taken in the Pierce University is as effective as in the Bronston College, and whether there are another ways to attract the gifted teachers, in order to reevaluate the author’s recommendation more appropriate.

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Revised By  shevava

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蓝色：结构句
红色：问题
绿色：好词句
橙色：段落总结

In this letter, the chairperson suggests that in order to attract the most gifted teachers and researchers, the Pierce University should offer employment to the spouse of each new faculty members they hired. To strengthen his recommendation, the chairperson cites a study to show that professors teaching in Bronston College, which has the similar situation of Pierce University, are happily living in small towns with their spouse also working in the same area. This argument suffers some critical flaws that seriously undermine the author’s conclusion and accordingly is not thoroughly well-reasoned. The main flaws of the letter will be discussed respectively.

To begin with, the arguer ignores to indicate the study that conducted by Bronston College can be trustworthy.(如果不可信，作者应该不会应用吧，是不是就像第一次说的，要反驳他的逻辑，即使他是对的，也推不出结论；或者要说，就写这个调查本身的问题…是吗？) On the one hand, the study may involve only the small size of professors in the university which obviously cannot illustrate the real results as the samples are not sufficient enough. On the other hand, the study may be viewed the young proffers（prefer） working in the university for just few years as key respondents and specially targeted, which evidently cannot represent all the professors in the university as the young may dissatisfy the working place and regret for their decision（s） after living in the small town many years later. Thus, lacking such information about the professors and their spouses, the creditability of the study is open to doubt.

Yet another problem in this letter is that even if the study do indicates（s） that professors in the Bronston College are satisfying(satisfied) with both teaching in the university and feeling happiness as(后面应该加句子或者改用for) their spouses living in the same area, the arguer false（fails） to think(consider好点儿？或者speculate; think好像缺少比较的意思) the same measures taken in Bronston College are also suitable for the Pierce University. It is quietly possible that it is because the fine weather and wonderful view surrounding（surrounded） in the area of Bronston College, which the Pierce University is not, that make the professor couples happily living（live） in that small town. Maybe, expect（besides） graceful environment for local people, the small town in Bronston also provides with low rising housing costs and convenient transportation for going to the big cities, which are also attractable for professors working in Bronston College rather than the Pierce University. (两点理由，fine weather and wonderful view和low rising housing costs and convenient transportation；可以试着长短句多结合一下，都是长句就多了)

The last but not the least, even if the two small towns are in the similar situation, arguer provides no evidence that the money invested in that effort will clearly be well spent and there in no other ways to attract the good teachers. The Bronston College may has（have） good financial status, while for the Pierce University, the money spent in offering employment to the spouse of each new faculty member maybe as much as the university cannot afford（may be as much as that the university cannot afford）. However,(不是转折吧，更进一步说吧) there are another ways to attract the excellent professors, such as increasing the salary paid for the professors, placing good equipment for their study, providing more chances for their promotion.（很好的理由） The arguer fails to offer such sufficient reasons and consider other alternative possibilities for appealing the most gifted teachers and researchers, which make his recommendation unpersuasive as it stands. (两点理由，lack of money和other ways to attract professors)

To sum up, this argument, while seems well-supported at first, has several flaws as discussed above. Hence it is unacceptable and not persuasive as it stands. Yet, it could be substantiated by provide more detailed information about the professors and why they decide to live in the small town. I would also need the evidence that the measures taken in the Pierce University is as effective as in the Bronston College, and whether there are another ways to attract the gifted teachers, in order to reevaluate the author’s recommendation more appropriate.

结构很好，条理清楚，逐级让步…（我觉得让步这事儿是不是得有一定的安排顺序，是吗？一直没找着答案…求讨论）；
内容在批注中都说了…对论点的发展也比较充分；
小的错误要稍微注意一下，注意长短句的结合；
总之是一篇不错的文…特别是一些高级词汇的运用，还有结构的组织，都增色不少。
   

nanfeng25899UID: 2629871

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  Logical Chain
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1 前提一：由B大学的调查表明，当他们的配偶也在同一个地区工作时，男女教授都会更快乐地生活在小镇上
2 前提二：尽管不可能所有位子都被接受或是看成理想的选择，花在这上的钱也会很值，因为如果配偶有工作的机会，新教授会更愿意来我们这儿。
3 结论：为吸引最有才能的老师和研究者来我们学校并提高整体员工的士气，我们应该给每位新员工的配偶提供工作机会。

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1 Study的可信度不能保证：调查人群？即使study可信，B的情况也不一定适用于P
2 花在为spouses提供动作这方面的钱，不一定能招来很多新的教授
3 即使通过这个方法吸引来的教授也不一定是最有天分的,士气也不一定会提高

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In the argument, the conclusion that the Pierce University can capture the most talented professors and enhance the morale of the whole stuff by providing their spouses jobs seem, at the first glance, to be trustful and tenable. However, before taking this plausible suggestion, we should think twice because there are a few flaws in this argument.

Firstly, the arguer does not offer us the enough information about the sample of the study thus making the conclusion ungrounded. There is a possibility that the professors involved in the study are just those in Broston College. If that is the case, how could we claim that the same outcome that if their spouses are employed in the same area the professors will lead a happier life goes for the Pierce University? Moreover, even if the consequences are reliable, there is also a false analogy between Bronston College and Pierce University because their disparity such as the reputation and geographic location will have a great influence on the attraction to the professors. Without informing us the specific information about the professors in the study and taking the difference of Bronston College and Pierce University, the advice is basically worthless.

Also, investing money on supplying jobs, to be honest, is not a sensible idea. For most professors, of course, if their spouses can have a chance of getting a job, they will be more likely to choose that university, However, in reality, whether they will accept universities' offers largely depends on many other factors such as the surrounding of the campus, the infrastructures, the reputation even the condition of their students. If the same amount of money is to be put into those aspects, the returning, that is the number of the new professors may be better than expected. Therefore, clearly the money put into this effort will not be effective as it stands unless we can confirm that compared with other factors their spouses’ jobs are the key ingredient to make their ultimate decision.

Finally, even if we indeed attract the professor eyesight on our university, it is more likely that they are not our target---the most gifted professors. The reason why those professors with poor ability come here is to help their spouses get the job rather than devoting themselves into the study and teaching. In this way, it is possible that they will not only make no contribution to improve the quality of teaching but also undermine the morale even bring a bad reputation. So in order to avoid this tragedy, we should be paid more attention to other sides instead of their spouses’ work.

Overall, the reasoning behind appears to be logic and persuasive. Without amplifying the quantity of the sample and offering more details about the essential introduction of Bronston College and Pierce University, the reliability of the study and the analogy between the two are really questionable. Without considering the best way to use the money and what kind of professors this program will bring to the university, we would better not take chances to waste the money on the feckless plan.


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Revised By

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星雨夜UID: 2780868

:loveliness::loveliness:

CypherUID: 2793818

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嗯...没啥用...有空再写...

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     论点提纲
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1.不一定是因为生活在一个地区所以高兴的, 故非充分条件
2.B和P错误类比, 不一定成立
3.建议不一定成立, 因为能否发充足的资金视条件而定
4.高兴不一定士气高, hasty generalization

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In this letter, the author recommends that we at Pierce University (P) should offer employment to the spouse of each new faculty member we hire in order to attract the most gifted teachers and researchers and improve the morale of our entire staff. To bolster his recommendation, the author asserts that professors in Bronston College (B) are happier living when their spouses are also employed in the same geographical area. Although it is ostensibly credible, closer scrutiny and consideration would reveal the hidden flaws in the line of reasoning.

To begin with, the author unfairly attributes the professors' happier lives to the mere fact that their spouses are afforded positions in the same town. The author overlooks many possible factors which might result in professors' happier lives in Bronston. Perhaps the academic conditions and atmospheres as well as wages are satisfactory. Or perhaps the environment in small town is peaceful and easy thus relieving them from the pressure got in metropolis. Without considering and eliminating these and other possible factors, the author could not convince us that it is because their spouses are employed in the same town that the professors are happier.

Yet, granted that it is due to their spouses' employment in the same town that these newly-hired professors are happier, the mere fact is scant evidence that P will achieve its goal by simply imitating B's example. The two universities might not be comparable in many aspects such as research condition, nationwide reputation, welfare, climatic condition, and so forth. Lacking evidence to verify that P and B are similar at least, the recommendation made by the author is nothing but a meaningless talk.

Furthermore, the author fails to provide details of the suggestion and estimate the feasibility. It is entirely possible that P University is a locally sponsored one and possesses no enough funds to ensure each new professor's spouse a job in the same area. Or perhaps it would exorbitantly high to seek positions for these professors' spouses. In short, without taking the university's financial ability into account and appraising the feasibility of his suggestion, the author could not guarantee the effectiveness of his suggestion.

Finally, even if P is able to ensure newly-hired professors' spouses jobs in the same area, the author fails to explain how it would improve the morale of entire staff. First, he does not provide any data concerning what proportion new professors takes in all staff. Second, the there are many elements determining the morale of staff, such as teaching and research condition, welfare and wages, the perspective of university and so on. Thus, the regardless of these factors, the author couldn't prove his method's effectiveness in improving the morale of entire staff.

In sum, the recommendation given by the author is untenable as discussed above. To support his recommendation, the author should provides detailed information to substantiate that it is because new professors' spouses are employed in the same area that they become happier. To better assess the suggestion, I would need to know whether P and B are comparable and how the method could improve the morale of entire staff. I would also need to know more evidence to confirm that the recommendation suffices to attract new gifted professor to our university.

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Revised By SHEVAVA 0.0
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批改标注:
1。红色，表示“错误”
2。洋红，表示“用法欠妥当”
3。蓝色，是我的批注
4。绿色，表示“很精彩的文字”

In this letter, the author recommends that we at Pierce University (P) should offer employment to the spouse of each new faculty member we hire in order to attract the most gifted teachers and researchers and improve the morale of our entire staff. To bolster his recommendation, the author asserts that professors in Bronston College (B) are happier living when their spouses are also employed in the same geographical area. Although it is ostensibly credible, closer scrutiny and consideration would reveal the hidden flaws in the line of reasoning.


本段的模板痕迹感觉比较重，最后一句虽然很好，但是应该是模板吧，现在尽量少用，最后创造出自己的

To begin with, the author unfairly attributes the professors' happier lives to the mere fact that their spouses are afforded positions in the same town. The author overlooks many possible factors which might result in professors' happier lives in Bronston. Perhaps the academic conditions and atmospheres as well as wages are satisfactory. Or perhaps the environment in small town is peaceful and easy thus relieving them from the pressure got in metropolis. Without considering and eliminating these and other possible factors, the author could not convince us that it is because their spouses are employed in the same town that the professors are happier.
个人感觉这段的谬误有点问题。。。题目中只是说他们的spouses被提供工作的话，他们的生活会开心，并没有说是因为他们的S有工作才开心。。。

Yet, granted that it is due to their spouses' employment in the same town that these newly-hired professors are happier, the mere fact is scant evidence that P will achieve its goal by simply imitating B's example. The two universities might not be comparable in many aspects such as research condition, nationwide reputation, welfare, climatic condition, and so forth. Lacking evidence to verify that P and B are similar at least, the recommendation made by the author is nothing but a meaningless talk.

Furthermore, the author fails to provide details of the suggestion and estimate the feasibility. It is entirely possible that P University is a locally sponsored one and possesses no enough funds to ensure each new professor's spouse a job in the same area. Or perhaps it would exorbitantly high to seek positions for these professors' spouses. In short, without taking the university's financial ability into account and appraising the feasibility of his suggestion, the author could not guarantee the effectiveness of his suggestion.

Finally, even if P is able to ensure newly-hired professors' spouses jobs in the same area, the author fails to explain how it would improve the morale of entire staff. First, he does not provide any data concerning what proportion new professors takes in all staff. Second, the there are many elements determining the morale of staff, such as teaching and research condition, welfare and wages, the perspective of university and so on. Thus, the regardless of these factors, the author couldn't prove his method's effectiveness in improving the morale of entire staff.【有点中国式，不知道改成 whether this method works in terms of improving morale of the entire staff会不会好点】

In sum, the recommendation given by the author is untenable as discussed above. To support his recommendation, the author should provides detailed information to substantiate that it is because new professors' spouses are employed in the same area that they become happier. To better assess the suggestion, I would need to know whether P and B are comparable and how the method could improve the morale of entire staff. I would also need to know more evidence to confirm that the recommendation suffices to attract new gifted professor to our university.
【最好把后面的3个句子合并一下，有点分散】

综合评价：
1 没有什么语法的错误，真的很厉害
2 模板的痕迹比较严重吧，不是很好拿高分，ETS的范文很少用模板什么的~~~
3 感觉你攻击的谬误有点偏。。。尤其是第一个，有点问题
4 我个人认为选3个谬误即可（ETS范文一般是3个），关键是把他们展开说（个人也在学习中）
5 第一段可以用题目中的内容，但最好转换称自己的话不要照抄；最后一段的表述在精炼一下~~

shevavaUID: 2574709

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Argument:
1\Bronston College, both male and female professors are happier living in small towns when their spouses are also employed in the same geographic area
2\ attracting the most gifted teachers and researchers to our faculty and improving the morale of our entire staff
3\ Although we cannot expect all offers to be accepted or to be viewed as an ideal job offer, the money invested in this effort will clearly be well spent because, if their spouses have a chance of employment, new professors will be more likely to accept our offers.
Conclusion:
We at Pierce University should offer employment to the spouse of each new faculty member we hire

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Structure:
1\给配偶工作跟happier直接没有必然关系；
2\地区之间是有差别的，两个地区之间地理位置，公共设施，交通情况等都会造成这种差别
3\这些钱不一定能被充分利用

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     习作正文
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In this letter, the arguer suggests that Pierce University should offer employment to the spouse of each new faculty member it hires for the purpose of attracting the most gifted teachers and researchers to its faculty and improving the morale of its entire staff. To support his point of view, he cites the results of some studies conducted by Bronston College which is also located in a small town. From my perspective, there're several logical flaws in this argument.

Firstly, the arguer fails to establish the causal relationship between the professors' being happier and their spouses being employed in the same geographic area. There may be some other reasons for their increasing happiness. For example, lives in the small town are quiet and uninterrupted, or the people there are friendly and helpful, etc. Without ruling out these possibilities, we can't just say that they are happier on account of their spouses' employment. Even if their spouses' employment is the reason, the arguer still mistakenly equates being happier and high morale of staff. That a professor is happier doesn't necessarily mean that his morale to work is higher. Maybe he just feels more at ease at school. And the professors' being happier has nothing to do with the whole staff's being happier and high morale.

What's more, the experiences of Bronston College might not apply to the Pierce University, because there might be quite a lot of differences between the two schools, such as the fields they are best at. Even if it can apply to Piece University as well, when a professor or researcher, especially a gifted one, selects universities, there will be quite a lot of factors he will take into account, such as the academic level and the experiment equipment of the university. It will be hard for Pierce University to attract new professors only by the way of offering to their spouse employment.

Even if Piece University do attract some gifted professors and researchers with this policy, we have no guarantee that the money invested in this effort will be well spent, because by doing this, there may be some other costs, such the high salary the university have to pay for the new faculty members and their spouses. And gifted professors and researchers do not necessarily mean breakthroughs in academics. So whether the new faculty members can contribute to the progress and profits of the university is open to doubt.

In conclusion, the arguer cites the results of some studies in Bronston College, but fails to notice the possible differences between the two schools and other possible reasons for the results, so the argument is not so convincing.

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     REVISED BY  HEBILL
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In this letter, the arguer suggests that Pierce University should offer employment to the spouse of each new faculty member it hires（这个有点罗嗦） for the purpose of attracting the most gifted teachers and researchers to its faculty and improving the morale of its entire staff. To support his point of view, he cites the results of some studies conducted by Bronston College which is also located in a small town. From my perspective, there're several logical flaws in this argument.

Firstly, the arguer fails to establish the causal（fail to 是没能。。。的意思，那这句是说论者没能建立这两者的因果关系，而实际上，他就是这样建立了因果关系啊。建议改为established。。。by mistake） relationship between the professors' being happier and their spouses being employed in the same geographic area. There may be some other reasons for their increasing happiness. For example, lives（ing）
in the small town are quiet and uninterrupted, or the people there are friendly and helpful, etc. Without ruling out these possibilities, we can't just say that they are happier on account of their spouses' employment. Even if their spouses' employment is the reason, the arguer still mistakenly equates being happier and high morale of staff. That a professor is happier doesn't necessarily mean that his morale to work is higher. Maybe he just feels more at ease at school. And the professors' being happier has nothing to do with the whole staff's being happier and high morale（这块儿要不要展开一下，没太看懂）.

What's more, the experiences of Bronston College might not apply to the Pierce University, because there might be quite a lot of differences between the two schools, such as the fields they are best at. Even if it can apply to Piece University as well, when a professor or researcher, especially a gifted one, selects universities, there will be quite a lot of factors he will take into account, such as the academic level and the experiment equipment of the university. It will be hard for Pierce University to attract new professors only by the way of offering to their spouse employment.

Even if Piece University do attract some gifted professors and researchers with this policy, we have no guarantee that the money invested in this effort will be well spent, because by doing this, there may be some other costs, such the high salary the university have to pay for the new faculty members and their spouses. And gifted professors and researchers do not necessarily mean breakthroughs in academics. So whether the new faculty members can contribute to the progress and profits of the university is open to doubt.
In conclusion, the arguer cites the results of some studies in Bronston College, but fails to notice the possible differences between the two schools and other possible reasons for the results, so the argument is not so convincing.（嗯结尾有点简单）

SandraShanUID: 2753079

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  Logical Chain
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1. professors are happier living in small towns when their spouses are also employed in the same geographic area-> offer employment to the spouse of each new faculty member we hire
2. their spouses have a chance of employment-> new professors will be more likely to accept our offers

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     论点提纲
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1调查的可信度
2配偶不一定接收工作
3未考虑教授考虑的其他因素



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     习作正文
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Grounding on a study which shows that Pierce University can attract more gifted teachers and researchers by a well arrange of the job of their spouses. As to the interesting way of attraction talented faculties, it was the conclusion drawn by some studies conducted by Bronston College. In the process before the chairperson say that offer to professor will be easier accepted exists many flaws.

First and foremost,when we take the use of some specific surveys’ results, the vital conditions of different environments should have something in common. For example, the premise of the application of the result is the two places are both small town and the professors they want to attract are have same thoughts as who received the survey. There is no fixed data to show the population or the areas about the so-called small town. It is easier for us to think that the town where Broston university located in is not a small town as the place where Pierce College in without any specific data. In addition, we are doubt about the levels or ranks of the two universities. The reasons why we need to consider it is that it is related to the professors they want to attract. In a high level of scientific, what they focus maybe more than the company by their families.

Besides, the arguer regards that teachers and faculty’s spouses will receive the job if it is fitful. Has he/she thought over that their spouses maybe teachers as well and they have make their decisions to devoted in the education field. If so, what will Bronston University do? What’s more, the action to create job opportunities and do not choose the best to these jobs will do harm to the development of the town. And weather the money invested into this is well spent or not is not judge by the arguer but by the space of the boost of local economic.

Last but not least, the arguer has made a mistake that he/she is lack of concerning about other factors affect their chosen. If these teachers in university only care about their spouses, they may do not have some achievement after they was signed and cannot serve for the original intention that is improve the moral of other faculties. However, the teachers who already have fame and attractive must pay attention to the application of labs and the level of students they will guide. So the only way to attract professors without any other actions and preparations may not work at all.

After the discussion about the flaws made in letter, the arguer need to find a more practice way more than just care about how do arrange their spouses only. With a high research level and a active atmosphere of study, the university will attract more talented teachers. And a good use of that amount of money into the improvement of local applications is more worthless.

hebillUID: 2532108

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1 BC（同处于小镇子）的调查表明 配偶和自己在同一个小城工作的男女教授更加开心
2 配偶有机会工作，这些新教授就会更愿意接受我们的offers。
3 结论：为吸引更多优秀人才，鼓舞士气，我们应该给每个新教工成员的配偶安排工作。

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1  some studies,概念模糊，什么时间，对该校多少名老师进行了调查，是否值得本校借鉴，除了同是在小城，两所学校还有什么不同点，气候？就业率？生活便利度？Presumptuous analogy
2  诚然调查可信的情况下，若新教授配偶全部安排工作，老员工配偶怎么办？没有配偶的单身教授怎么办？会影响公平原则。这样又如何鼓舞士气呢？二，经费能否支撑？学校是否需要这么多教工？效率低下。
3  如果P大学的大多数教授的配偶在本镇上都有较为满意的工作，这一提案就是一种浪费，这个需要调研，另外，对于P大学教授来说，很有可能令他们感到更加快乐的因素也和BC不尽相同，可能更好的社保医保实验室条件是他们更迫切需要解决的问题。都需要调研。
4  学校吸引最优秀教授的根本还是提高学校硬软件实力，这样做是可以表达学校求贤若渴的诚意，但需要更多的调研再看是否可以采纳。
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The argument shows us a letter from a department chairperson to the president of Pierce University which contains a well-prepared proposal, yet not a well-reasoned one. In the letter, the chairperson argued that Pierce University should offer employment to the spouse of each new faculty member we hire for the sake of attracting the most prominent teachers and researchers to P University and improving the morale of the entire staff. Then the chairperson raised some studies in BC to demonstrate the suggestion’s reliability. Nevertheless, the reasoning is not so convincing as the chairperson ignored the fact that problems with complexity usually lied in factors of various aspects.


To begin with, from the letter, we learn that BC is similar with P University with regard to locations. Yet a presumptuous analogy should not be adopted only on the basis of locations. On one hand, as to the studies in BC, the chairperson ignored that timing was a crucial factor in a social survey. Did the survey take place a few months ago or several decades ago? How many faculties involved in the interviews? Were the majority of respondents young or aged? Beside the similarity of the locations of two Universities, on the other hand, they are likely to be two quite different towns with diverse climates, traffic, demographics etc. Therefore, it is incomprehensive to compare P University with BC, merely because they are located in small towns.

Hypothetically, the studies are convincing and applicable to P University, it still has a long way to go to fulfill this proposal. First, if P University offers jobs to the spouses of each new members of the faculty, what about the spouses of each incumbent faculties? It is also crucial for them to reunite with their spouses happily. What’s more, in order to improve the morale of the entire staff we should not omit the happiness of single faculties who are the majority of young teachers. In addition, the money invested in the project may be immense, thus we should make a detailed investigation and estimate the profit and the cost exactly. For instance, it is likely that most of the spouses of P University own satisfying jobs in the same town, which make this proposal a waste. Besides, with regard to faculties and the new ones in P University, maybe better health-insurance, wages and laboratory conditions are more attractive rather than merely family reunite. In this condition, the president in P University should make efforts to improve these fields.

Admittedly, the letter from the chairperson of the department reveals the strong will of P University to enroll the most genius teachers and researchers. However, this significant proposal lacks indispensable investigations and surveys to demonstrate its reliability and feasibility. More reasons for this suggestion should be put forward further.

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kingwyf87UID: 2457409

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Issue153

"Students should bring a certain skepticism to whatever they study. They should question what

they are taught instead of accepting it passively."

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kingwyf87UID: 2457409

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1在质疑的过程中，可以加深对知识的认识，在解决问题的过程中，学习能力、查资料的能力、思考能力不断提高
2 应该鼓励学生的怀疑精神，不但对自己有利更对国家的发展有利
3 对于年龄小的儿童，有时被动接受是必要的，因为他们还缺乏辨别是非的能力，缺乏对一个问题的全面的认识。

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The issue of whether students should question what they are taught—a certain skepticism to whatever they study—is a complex and controversial one. Different people hold different opinions due to their respective ways of looking at an issue. In my point of view, however, I do not agree that students should question whatever they study. Rather, I hold the opinion that students should be encouraged to think critically about what they have learned rather than accepting it passively. My view will be greatly strengthened by the following discussion.

To begin with, a skepticism, or critical thinking, helps us uncover bias and prejudice and distinguish between opinion and fact. During the questioning, students would learn well on the knowledge what they are studying, and also have a well sense on how to use them. For example, when we studying on the course of kalman filter, it is better for student themselves to question and figure out the scope of application of kalman filter by putting it into practice within various situation rather than being passively told by teachers. Only in this way can students really master this technology both in theoretical analysis and in practical application for different senses. What’s more, the critical thinking could be helpful for students to enhance other abilities of future study, such as the ability of learning, thinking and finding information effectively.

Moreover, students should be encouraged to think critically which benefits not only themselves but also the whole country. What’s the aim of education? Generally speaking, the education is a means to foster the individual’s, society’s, and even humanity’s future development and prosperity. And without critical thinking, the individuals can do nothing meaningfulness let alone creating a better life for human themselves. Chinese students have earned good reputation of smart and working hard as their obtaining innumerable prizes for solving the math problems in worldwide competitions. However, the education has full of problems in china. One of the fatal flaws is that most Chinese students just passively learn from their teachers. Studying like machines without further deeply thinking. Compared with the Chinese students, the American students have received much practice for their critical thinking. Therefore, although the American students are not as smart as Chinese ones, they have well-learned abilities and strong sense of innovation, which make US national strength and international competitiveness stand out of world.

However, accepting the knowledge passively is sometimes necessary. We are not to be born with the ability of critical thinking. We should better to take advices from such as parents, teachers, and elders especially at very young. Supposing that children are told by the teachers in preliminary school that it is not right for them to watch the TV shows which involve the contents such as blood, violence. If the children does not listen to the children and decide to find out why the teachers ask them not to do so, it is highly possible that they may suffer the bad influence from the TV shows as the immature ability of self-discrimination, self-control and self-discipline. Similarly, parents usually not allow their children to date with others as they are too young to deal with their feelings. If the children question their parents and decide to go against them, just because their curiosity, they may be hurt eventually. Even worse, such painful experience may make them lost and have bad influence on their future life. In both two cases mentioned above, the students should passively take the adults’ advises for good, and avoid putting themselves in trouble.

To sum up, basing my conclusion on the illustrations and exposition mentioned above, accordingly, I hold that students should be encouraged to think critically about what they have learned rather than accepting it passively. But in some circumstance thing become more complicated, students especially when they are very young should take advises from such as parents and teachers without much questioning as they always wanting helping us from outside harm.

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Revised By  nanfeng25899  

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1。红色，表示“错误”
2。洋红，表示“用法欠妥当”
3。蓝色，是我的批注
4。绿色，表示“很精彩的文字”

The issue of whether students should question what they are taught—a certain skepticism to whatever they study—is a complex and controversial one. Different people hold different opinions due to their respective ways of looking at 【treating比较好】an issue. In my point of view, however, I do not agree that students should question whatever they study. Rather, I hold the opinion that students should be encouraged to think critically about what they have learned rather than accepting it passively. My view will be greatly strengthened by the following discussion.

【有点感觉这几句话来会说，可以简化一下~~】

To begin with, a skepticism, or critical thinking, helps us uncover bias and prejudice and distinguish between opinion and fact【感觉opinion和fact不算是对立的两部分吧，不能用 distinguish】. During the questioning, students would learn well on the knowledge what they are studying, and also have a well sense on how to use them. For example, when we studying on the course of kalman filter, it is better for student themselves to question and figure out the scope of application of kalman filter by putting it into practice within various situation rather than being passively told by teachers. Only in this way can students really master this technology both in theoretical analysis and in practical application for different sense【没见过这个词组】. What’s more, the critical thinking could be helpful for students to enhance other abilities of future study, such as the ability of learning, thinking and finding information effectively.

【感觉最后加的这个论点还应该加上些事例，要不感觉这段好像没有完】

Moreover, students should be encouraged to think critically which benefits not only themselves but also the whole country. What’s the aim of education? Generally speaking, the education is a means to foster the individual’s, society’s, and even humanity’s future【虽然明白你的意思，但是这样表述有点怪】 development and prosperity. And without critical thinking, the individuals can do nothing meaningfulness【meaningful】 let alone creating a better life for human themselves【去掉】. Chinese students have earned good reputation of smart and working hard as their obtaining innumerable prizes for solving the math problems in worldwide competitions.【as为“因为”的意思时候加句子，建议吧as改成for】 However, the education has full of problems in china. One of the fatal flaws is that most Chinese students just passively learn from their teachers. Studying like machines without further deeply thinking. Compared with the Chinese students, the American students have received much practice for their critical thinking. Therefore, although the American students are not as smart as Chinese ones, they have well-learned abilities and strong sense of innovation, which make US national strength and international competitiveness stand out of world.【改成 which is the reason why US outstands in the fierce and international competition.】

【写美国人不聪明，他们会不会生气哈~~~】

However, accepting the knowledge passively is sometimes necessary. We are not to be【去掉】 born with the ability of critical thinking. We should better to take advices from such as parents, teachers, and elders especially at very young【不确定是否可以这样表达】. Supposing【suppose。 Supposing一般是当做现在分词，后面是有句子的】 that children are told by the teachers in preliminary school that it is not right for them to watch the TV shows which involve the contents such as blood, violence【有点中国英语，尤其是blood】. If the children does not listen to the children【写错了吧】 and decide to find out why the teachers ask them not to do so, it is highly possible that they may suffer the bad influence from the TV shows as【错误如前面所说的。改成because of/due to】 the immature ability of self-discrimination, self-control and self-discipline. Similarly, parents usually not 【do not】allow their children to date with others as they are too young to deal with their feelings. If the children question their parents and decide to go against them, just because their curiosity, they may be hurt eventually. Even worse, such painful experience may make them lost【upset】 and have bad influence on their future life. In both two cases mentioned above, the students should passively take the adults’ advises for good, and avoid putting themselves in trouble.

【感觉这段的例子比较牵强，尤其是家长的那个】

To sum up, basing my conclusion on the illustrations and exposition mentioned above, accordingly, I hold that students should be encouraged to think critically about what they have learned rather than accepting it passively. But in some circumstance【加s】 thing【加s】 become more complicated, 【加上and】students especially when they are very young【改成定语从句】 should take advises from such as parents and teachers without much questioning as they always wanting helping us from outside harm. 【as还是前面的问题，后面的表述有点中国式英语】

综合评价：
1 语法错误相对比较多，注意as的用法
2 例证的说服力比较弱，有的例子不太合适，缺少真正的例子
3 语言表述方面还需提高。尽量减少中国式英语；尽量精炼语言

nanfeng25899UID: 2629871

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1质疑是深入思考的结果，被动的接受是不能真正理解知识的
2质疑是追求新知识的起源，会带来真正的进步
3 真正的质疑是不是盲目的而是有原则的

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In the long history, masses of great achievements results from the skepticism of those thinkers who are the ones to make considerable headway in all fields. However, accepting passively what the teachers teach in the classes has been a routine for the students. Therefore, in order to give a real shove to our development, it is the high time for us to advocate the issue that the students should learn actively and question what they are taught.

First of all, Skepticism is the ultimate result of thinking one thing thoroughly and deeply. Einstein once said: coming up with a question will be more crucial than solving a question. The real think always begins with the realization of the questions, because those "why", "what" and "how" would let think about it at all levels so as to figure them out. On the contrary, no doubts are more likely to mean that you just consider what you have gained superficially. Nowadays, dozens of graduates with high GPA and degree can not apply what they learned into the practical work because in the courses they barely recite the knowledge in their notes rather than apprehending them, not to speak of raising some questions about them. Therefore, always suspecting about what they are imparted to is a obvious sign that they really think it and master the knowledge in the real sense.

Also, Skepticism is the origin of pursuing the new knowledge.
The majority of the accomplishments start with the purposes to work out the difficult questions. The time that we have no question about anything perhaps means no room to enhance ourselves. David Hilbert, a Germany mathematician, put forth a list of the 23 unsolved questions during the course of the Second International Congress of the Mathematics. In this meeting, since then many mathematicians aims at solving those problems thereby propelling the development of math. For learning, as a result, the skepticism is not the end but the beginning of a new stage which waits for us to explore.

However, even if we should throw doubts on the knowledge, those questions must be on the basis of the fact that we have made a study of and thoroughly think about it. To be honest, if we just put up some questions and wait other to supply the answers, there will be no difference with accepting it directly. Only by studying the materials about the issue and forming your own unique opinion can you master the knowledge hidden behind it. Or you are just like a naive child wondering about everything around him/her, whose questions are mostly worthless because most answers of them can be found in the elementary school books.

Overall, skepticism is the indispensible element in the process of understanding the knowledge deeply and creating new ideas, thus pushing our world towards a better future. But like what I have stated, the skepticism is ought not to be blind, otherwise doubts before thinking and studying is no better than accepting it passively.

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shevavaUID: 2574709

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The method of studying, in our modern society, is in the centre of controversy. As the ability to study is regarded as one of the measurements of the individual's personal ability, more and more attention are attracted to relevant topics, from the accepting knowledge passively to learning by curiosity, from the evaluation only by grade to cultivating the ability as the main purpose. Recently, skepticism is granted as a necessity for students to make progress and formula his own thinking, for critical thinking weighs much more nowadays.

Skepticism is the motivation for and wells of the individual progress. During the process of studying, when you question what you are taught, questions will turn out continuously, and if all these questions are understood, your accumulation of knowledge will have you apply them in your practical life more smoothly. On the other hand, if some of the questions are open to doubt, you should deal with them through referring to books or learning from others or looking for the answers in the nature and what the process brings to you will be a great contribution. The book and knowledge taught by teachers are the inspirations. After a student has raised a question, he will search for data to support his or her point of view, and it is where the thorough investigation from which real understanding comes is based.

Critical thinking can be cultivated by the spirit of skepticism. Without skepticism of what you are taught, you are conditioned by the conventions of the old frames, and in the era of innovation, you will lag behind definitely. And on the other hand, by the time when you face a problem which has no definite and correct answer, students won't freeze regarding what to be done. After stepping into the society, there may be some results from other people's research, but the results are usually not complete and accurate enough. If one takes these results for granted, he or she will never achieve anything original.

Additionally, skepticism can also promote the progress of humanity. A lot of new discoveries and truths of nature are found by people who are open to doubt. Galileo is a case in that point that when he learned that the falling speed of objects had correlation with its mass, curiosity arose in his mind. Therefore, he climbed the Leaning Tower of Pisa, and dropped various weights from the top; and lately, he rolled balls down from the inclined planes. With all these experiments, Galileo generalized all the results into the famous law of free fall. Without the skepticism of Galileo, nobody will know when this important law of nature would be presented.

In conclusion, critical thinking is an indispensable part of our education. The students should be ready to doubt and challenge what they learn, and this experience makes a deeper impression in their minds. The atmosphere of skepticism is needed to be created by the educational system.

小肯0113UID: 2590901

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1、赞成这个观点， skepticism make passive go away, more activeabout study
2、skepticism可以让既定的知识跟随时代发展的脚步
3、但是有些学科用这样的方式不合适，比如语言学习类，语法规则等是前人总结经验skepticism的眼光学到新东西

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The issue relates to shouldbring more skepticism to their own study is important which people has variousopinion on it. I agree with the statement. It is obvious that the statement isintend to encourage students to think independently and inspire them to findand create new things.

First, skepticism is agood medicine for passive attitude. In studying, students need moreself-motivation than people’s enforcement in order to truly understand theknowledge. Skepticism should be considered as a good method to motivate people.You have a question, you will want to find the answer, that’s human nature. Skepticismalways means question and answer procedure, which is an active attitude tostudy and human life. On the other hand, passive attitude always relate tolazy, procrastination and fail. If we can use it in the right way to improve ourselves itwill finally become part of our personality which will benefit us in the future.

Secondly, knowledgedoesn’t just means rules, model and other stationary ideas but also means howto use them in real life. Skepticism help people to use the knowledge themlearned from the class to solve real problems. For instance, people createpressure cooker to cook food under low-pressure condition after they found outthat some place water cannot be boiled under 212F, even the Physics axiom saidso. Similar instance are numerous, and it is accepted by a lot of educationalistsand college professors that skepticism seems to be one of the most importantquality of a successful students and researchers.


However, skepticism maynot as useful as acceptation when comes to certain area study like language. Itis not efficient to ask question about why the grammar of a sentence is showingthis way because knowledge like grammar and idiomatic usages are more likepredecessors’ experience than a provable formula. Still, skepticism as part ofour mode of thinking can help you use these formulas correctly and appropriately.

My college professorsaid, education is not telling you something but inspire you to find your ownanswer. I believe this is the true meaning of education and skepticism wouldhelp a lot to complete this task.

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hebillUID: 2532108

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1 质疑是学习中很重要的品质，它带来了创新的原动力，它调动起学生思考的积极性，没有了质疑，社会不能进步，只能固步自封.一个例子，原子模型的例子。
2 无论学习什么都要质疑吗？举两个例子证明不是这样的
3 要保持质疑精神，同时也不能忘记，作为学生，我们要先站在巨人的肩膀上。
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The issue with related to whether students should bring a certain skepticism to whatever they study rather than accept what they taught passively is a controversial yet important problem. As a student myself, it is time for me to figure out the answer to this question. I hold the opinion that it is appropriate for students to keep a certain skepticism in some fields of studies, and accept something that is fundamental or established by long-term usage somewhat passively. My view will be intensified by the discussion that follows.

First, skepticism is, on one hand, an indispensable characteristic that brings the motivation of innovation and urge students to think more positively. Without skepticism, a society will be unable to make any progress. On the other hand, not just in the field of study, the ability of critical thinking has far-reaching meanings in students’ lives in the future. Only with this feature, can a student stick to his/her own opinions rather than following up others’ views randomly. A famous story in physics history illustrates my point. In 1904, the physicist, Thomason, acclaimed that electrons should be arranged evenly in an atom just like plums embedded in the cakes. After his theory on the atom model, scientists with strong skepticism continued the research and in 1908, experiments by the physicist Rutherford established an overwhelming structure of an atom, that is, a dense nucleus of positive charge surrounded by lower-mass electrons. As stated above, skepticism leads to progress. In 1913, Danish physicist postulated that electrons resided in quantized energy states, with the energy determined by the angular momentum of the electron's orbits about the nucleus. Research on this subject is still going on nowadays, which indicates that people can recognize the world better with critical thinking.

However, study with skepticism does not mean that students need to doubt everything they have learned. For example, when our Chinese students begin to study English, it is always confusing the sentence “I am at home” rather than “I at home” as in Chinese there is no link verb “be”. Under this condition, instead of teaching a pupil the structure of sentences, teachers always instructed us to recite this sentence passively. Therefore, as stated above, long-tern usage or accumulation are vital for language studies. In this case, skepticism is likely to lead the students in a puzzled way. Another example is from the experience of my advanced mathematics study. Because of the random skepticism, at very beginning, I misunderstood a lot of elementary concepts and theories and then was unwilling to study the course further. At that time, with the help of the mathematics teacher, I realized skepticism must lie in the basis of theories that had been testified true. As I was a rookie in this field, I should pay more attention in accepting, not doubting. Finally, at the end of the semester, I did a good job in this course, what is more, I learned the better way of thinking. From these cases, it is obvious that skepticism to everything a student learns may be harmful for the study sometimes.


To sum up, as said above, the student should bring a certain skepticism in his/her study, however, in the same time, they should not ignore the importance of knowledge accumulation. As Newton said , students should “ stand on the giants shoulders”. Otherwise, one will stick in the mud of countless doubt and can not move a step toward the truth.

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